Crossed

by OneOverTwo

Mystery's Misery Maintained.

Derpy woke up.

She was in Twilight’s guest bed. Twilight herself was snoozing on Derpy’s side.
Derpy poked her with a hoof.

“No… I don’t want to leave school mommy…” said Twilight.

Derpy would’ve rolled her eyes at that if she really could.
She then tried the feathers to the nose trick on Twilight.

“Ah! Choo~!” said Twilight.

She was bleary eyed and definitely tired.

“You’re awake?” said Twilight, “Does that mean my disruptive sound theory worked?”

“I didn’t hear anything…” said Derpy.

“That means it could go either way,” said Twilight, “I’ll have to play all the sounds I played tonight over again when you fall asleep again. Tell me, was there anything on the other side that might’ve made you go to sleep?”

“I dunno, maybe?” said Derpy.

“I’ll have to postpone my sound test then. Next time you’re awake, use anything that may have caused you to sleep before you would do so naturally,” said Twilight.

“Um, okay,” said Derpy.

Twilight walked over to her bed so she could get some proper rest.

“Oh,” said Twilight, “and one other thing.”

“What?” said Derpy.

“I need you to do something that might be a bit uncomfortable for you,” said Twilight.

‘Aside from that machine?’ thought Derpy.

“What?” said Derpy.

“I’m going to need you to talk to Sunset Shimmer,” said Twilight.

---

“Holy Carpentry! Is she alright?” said Watermelody.

Derpy had passed out on the floor. Her face was flat against the ground, her head had banged against the coffee table which it was under afterwards. The vase on it tipped over, pouring water onto the ground. Her feet were pushing against the couch, this combined with how solidly her face gripped the floor resulted in her rear sticking straight up.

Despite her panic, Watermelody’s feet were still resting on the coffee table. This meant that when Derpy hit the table it didn’t get pushed ahead so much as it got turned. The wall next to the couch gained a small dent in it.

“Don’t worry your pretty little head… you,” said Derpy’s mom.

“Watermelody,” said Watermelody.

“Noted!” said Derpy’s mom, “But anyway, Derpy’s just having some sort of narcoleptic spell. She usually has them around Thanksgiving. Maybe it’s something to do with the turkey considering…”

“Derpy has narcolepsy?” said Watermelody.

“No, no, no, least not any type I’ve read about,” said Derpy’s mom.

Watermelody knit her brows.

“You should probably take your daughter to a doctor or something, miss,” said Watermelody.

---

“W-why would I want to do that?” said Derpy.

It was useless as Twilight had already fallen back to sleep.

“We’d better be talking about this in the morning…” said Derpy.

Lacking anything better to do, Derpy went downstairs and began reading library books.
Scanning the shelves she found Equestria’s version of Provoking Thoughts ‘Delusions of Reality’. Derpy decided against reading it.

‘I’m confused enough without all this psychological mumbo-jumbo,’ thought Derpy.

Daring Do turned out to be a bit too similar to the other world’s version to really hold her interest.
The Ponyville library didn’t seem to have its own comic section, at least not one that Derpy could find.
Finally she settled on a book called ‘Pepper Pie’s Big Adventure’.
The book looked fantastical enough that she thought it would make her forget about her confusion.

---

Derpy the human was being carried to a slightly beat up compact car by her mother and Watermelody. Watermelody was walking on her heels; It took seemingly hours to place Derpy in the car’s back seats.

“So… think she’ll be alright like that?” said Watermelody.

“Don’t worry, people in our family are tough little numbers,” said Derpy’s mom.

“It’s just, I don’t think we placed her in a very comfortable position,” said Watermelody.

Derpy was sitting on her left hand. Her head was leaning against the car’s left back-window. She had her legs crossed and her left foot was touching the right back-door.
Derpy’s mom looked at her with the rearview mirror before adjusting it.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” said Derpy’s mom, “but you are right about the fact that I probably should have taken her to a doctor, figure out what exactly is off about her.”

Watermelody just nodded.

They drove to the most convenient hospital. There had been a bumpy road in the middle of their journey.

“Does anything wake that girl up?” said Watermelody.

“Not anything I’ve tried,” said Derpy’s mom, “and believe me, I’ve tried.”

---

Princess Twilight Sparkle felt well rested, though it was still a bit late. She went down the stairs to discover Derpy leaning against a bookshelf and reading.
Derpy didn’t look the least bit tired.

“Man, Twilight, this book is way~ longer than I thought it would be,” said Derpy.

“Man?” said Twilight.

“Oh, sorry, slip of the tongue,” said Derpy.

Twilight gently moved closer to her mysterious subject.

“Aren’t you the least bit tired?” said Twilight, “You’ve been up half the night.”

“Nope,” said Derpy.

“Hmmm, I wonder if that’s a side-effect of your predicament,” said Twilight.

“I bet it has something to do with all the coffee I drank,” said Derpy, who by the way thought coffee was supposed to wake you up because it was so bitter, “Sorry for drinking all your coffee, by the way.” And yes, she drank all the decaff too.

Twilight was silent for a long moment.

“...I’m still not discounting the possibility.”

---

“This girls seems to be in a deep coma,” said a doctor, “Nothing seems to rouse her.”

Derpy was in a hospital gown, lying on a bed. A doctor had been carefully examining her sleeping form. The hospital was clean and drab, as they are oft to be.

“She’s just a very deep sleeper,” said Derpy’s mom, “She’ll get up any time now.”

The doctor gave her a confused look.

“If this is just a ‘deep sleep’, I think we might just have a brand new condition on our hands,” said the doctor.

Watermelody was waiting off to one side, rubbing her feet in an attempt to make them feel better.

“Maybe I can name it,” said the doctor.

Derpy’s mom gave him a disapproving glare.

“Af-after her of course,” said the doctor, “Anyway, I’ll want to keep her here. At least until she wakes up.”

---

“I’ll do it,” said Derpy.

Twilight scrunched up her face in confusion.

“Do what?” said Twilight.

“I’ll talk to Sunset Shimmer,” said Derpy.