Crossed

by OneOverTwo

Bad Things Don’t Happen.

Author's Note:

Everything'll be fine, I promise.

Princess Twilight Sparkle did not like what was happening, not one bit.

“Oh no, oh no, oh no,” said Twilight Sparkle.

She heard Derpy’s wretched screaming only intensify as she heard each word Twilight say.

“The subject is suffering harshly,” said Sunset Shimmer as she gazed over Derpy’s quivering form, “She may be suffering from overstimulation due not being used to being conscious in both bodies at once.”

“This is all my fault man, all my fault,” said Atom as he sat on the floor, knees brought close to shoulders.

Sunset only rolled her eyes at his behavior and turned her attention back to the girl who seemed to be suffering from an intense pain.

Though Twilight did not hear Sunset’s guess as to what was causing Derpy such agony, her first instinct was to cast a spell that cut Derpy the pony from all sensation.

The bodies stopped their screaming.

Derpy the human got up, still shivering.

“Am I dead?” said Derpy, “You know… over there.”

“From what I heard, it would’ve had to be a mercy killing,” said Sunset Shimmer.

Derpy shivered a bit more intensely for just a second.

“I suppose you’re right,” said Derpy, tear rolling down her face as if her eyes were raining clouds, “I just wish I could’ve told Carrot Top and her family what happened.”

“Hey,” said Sunset Shimmer, kneeling down and putting her hand on Derpy’s shoulder, “It may not be the most convenient, but the portal in the horse statue will still open. You’ll still be able to tell them, you just have to wait a bit.”

Sunset Shimmer did not know who Derpy was talking about, but she felt like she had to comfort her. After all, this experiment had been her idea. If anything, she should’ve been the one doing what Atom was doing.

Sunset kept her faculties though, but even so, she felt worse than she ever felt before in her life.

“Yeah, you’re right,” said Derpy, wiping her tears and snot though clearly still distraught.

It was at that moment Twilight Sparkle decided to remove the spell she had cast on Derpy. Fortunately, Twilight made sure that Derpy was put in a place where there wasn’t a lot of stimuli. Derpy the pony was suspended a few feet in the air by a simple frame with a platform and most assuredly blindfolded. Her limbs were all held in place, but all with enough freedom to move around a bit. Twilight had decided to still magically numb Derpy the pony’s tactile senses. She had soundproofed the room Derpy the pony was in.

Derpy’s ears, however, were working at full capacity.

“Derpy, can you hear me?” whispered Twilight Sparkle.

“Princess Twilight?” said Derpy.

“What about Twilight Sparkle?” said Sunset Shimmer, “Look, I’m sure she had a good reason.”

“Should I speak a bit louder?” whispered Twilight Sparkle.

“Yes, I can barely hear you,” said Derpy.

“Um, okay?” said Sunset Shimmer.

“Is this fine?” said Twilight Sparkle, her voice now; though a tad quiet; easier to hear than a whisper.

“Yes, talk like that,” said Derpy.

“I don’t quite understand what you’re saying,” said Sunset Shimmer, “I hope you didn’t lose any cognitive functions when your other body died.”

“Is pony me dead?” said Derpy.

“No, why would you think that?” said Twilight Sparkle.

“I guess we don’t really know if that’s true,” said Sunset Shimmer.

“I lost all feeling in my pony self,” said Derpy.

“Oh, that,” said Twilight Sparkle, “Sorry for giving you such a spook.”

“It’s entirely possible that that body just entered a coma like state for some reason,” said Sunset Shimmer.

“I cut off all sensation with a spell, it was the only way I could think of to make you stop being in agony,” said Twilight Sparkle, “I’ve since stopped the spell, but I still felt that I had to hamper your senses a bit. I made sure to numb your pain still.”

“That’s good,” said Derpy.

“Well, I mean, there’s still a ch-” said Sunset Shimmer.

“Shush, Sunset! I’m trying to talk to Twilight!” said Derpy.

“What?” said Sunset Shimmer.

Atom looked up.

“Wait… so it was successful?” said Atom.

---

Two teenaged girls were walking thru the residential areas late at night.

“I’m tellin’ ya, Golden Hazel, I lost a french horn around here by Derpy’s house,” said Watermelody.

“You know where Derpy lives?” said Golden Hazel, “Are you extorting her now?”

Golden Hazel didn’t have any idea why Watermelody would want to find french horn that she had dropped, especially since she seemed to be relocating instruments to random places over the surprise break, but she did suppose that she didn’t really know what Watermelody was up to.

"Oh, just because I tried to blackmail Starlight that one time I'm always trying to do it to everyone I meet, huh?" said Watermelody, "I learned my lesson when she blackmailed me right back!"

"Don't say that as if you're proud of it!" said Golden Hazel.

An agonizingly pained sounding scream rang out thru-out the area, it continued on.

"Gads, my body hurts just listening to that. Where is that coming from?" said Golden Hazel.

Watermelody's eyes widened when she realized something.

"Oh no," said Watermelody, "that's coming from Derpy's house!

---

“Hey, a thought occurred to me,” said Atom, no longer whimpering; but still curled up on the floor.

“What?” said Sunset Shimmer.

“Shouldn’t her mom have heard her agony?” said Atom, pointing at Derpy.

“Oh mom? She’s out,” said Derpy.

“Why?” said Sunset Shimmer.

Derpy just shrugged.

“Argh! This so frustrating!” said Twilight Sparkle, “I can only hear what you’re saying, and not anything the humans you’re talking to say!”

“Gee, sorry Twilight, I just don’t know what I can do about that,” said Derpy.

“What are you apologizing to her for?” said Sunset Shimmer.

“Wait a moment,” said Twilight Sparkle, “I have an idea!”

“What?” said Derpy.

“I said why a- Wait, you’re talking to her, aren’t you?” said Sunset Shimmer.

“Okay Derpy, when I say something; I want you to say it at the same time I do,” said Twilight Sparkle.

“Just don’t use any big words,” said Derpy.

“I’ll try,” said Twilight Sparkle right before she coughed to clear her throat.

“Sunset Shimmer, this is Twilight Sparkle, I’ve gotten Derpy to speak with me synchr-” said Twilight and Derpy.

“-onously with me,” said Twilight Sparkle.

“sync- syn- chro-...” said Derpy at more or less the same time as her, “Twilight! I said no big words!”

“Oops, sorry,” said Twilight Sparkle.

“I’ve gotten Derpy to talk with at the same time as a way to speak to you quickly,” said Twilight Sparkle, “You should probably do the same.”

“Right,” said Sunset Shimmer, “Ready, Derpy?”

Derpy nodded her head.

“This is Sunset Shimmer. Now that we have opened direct communications thru the subject, what do you think our next course of action should be?” said Sunset & Derpy.

“Why do you call her a subj-” said Twilight and Derpy.

“-ect,” finished Twilight Sparkle.

“Hey yeah! why are you calling me a subject?” said Derpy, giving Sunset a bit of a glare.

Sunset Shimmer sighed and put her hand over her face.

“Force of habit, I guess,” said Sunset Shimmer, “Listen Derpy, I’m sorry. It’s technically true, but I guess saying it like that is a bit insensitive.”

“Apology accepted,” said Derpy.

“... May I please speak to Sunset Shimmer now?” said Twilight Sparkle.

“Oh sure thing Twilight,” said Derpy, who then waited just a bit for Twilight to once again speak.

“I think that you should take her to horse statue portal and see if we can do anything further there,” said Twilight and Derpy.

“Alright. You’re in for something special tomorrow at school, Derpy,” said Sunset and Derpy.

“You didn’t have to say that last part, Derpy,” said Sunset and Derpy.

“Oh, oops,” said Derpy.

Suddenly the door slammed open.

“Twilight! We heard a scream all the way across town,” said Carrot Top, “I’m really surprised there aren’t more ponies here investigating, honestly.

“Carrot Top?!” said Derpy. Not only was Carrot Top there, but her equally concerned family was with her, though Derpy couldn’t see that.

“I thought I told you to stop calling me that,” said Golden Hazel.

“Oh great, it’s Drama Letter and Watermelody,” said Sunset Shimmer.

“That’s Dodo Brain and Watermelody, thank you very much,” said Watermelody. She was promptly smacked in the back of her head by Golden Hazel.

“That’s Golden Hazel and Doodoo Brain, thank you very much,” said Golden Hazel. Watermelody just grumbled while she rubbed her head.

Carrot Top, Written Script, Amethyst Star, and Dinky all noticed that Derpy was suspended and bound with a blindfold on.

“What?!” said Written Script.

“We heard terrible screaming coming from Derpy’s house and came as soon as we could,” said Watermelody.

“I didn’t know you were like this,” said Carrot Top, making sure to cover Dinky’s eyes, “Uh! Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Though you should really invest in sound proofing.”

“Ooh, you found somepony; a princess no less,” said Amethyst Star, “Be sure to invite us to the wedding!”

“She made us stop for ice cream on the way,” said Golden Hazel.

“What?! This isn’t what it looks like!” said Twilight Sparkle.

“I would hope so,” said Written Script.

“As soon as we could,” said Watermelody.

“Everyone shut up!” said Derpy, “You’re overloading my brain with all your chatter.”

“Sorry,” said all on both sides, though the sides weren’t quite matched up with each other.

“Twilight, I can’t see a thing,” said Derpy.

“Me neither!” said Dinky, prodding her mother’s leg in an attempt to remove it from her face, “It’s butts!”

“Atom, blindfold my human form heavily,” said Derpy, “Do your best to make it so that no light passes thru to my eyes.”

Atom went and grabbed a bunch of Derpy’s shirts, favoring the ones that seemed thicker to him, and started wrapping them so as to cover Derpy’s eyes.

“Sunset, explain to Golden Hazel and Watermelody what happened, I’ll do my best to explain to my pony friends,” said Derpy, “Twilight, remove the blindfold please.”

Sunset Shimmer led the two dramatically inclined humans out of Derpy’s earshot.

“Alright,” said Twilight Sparkle, shortly doing as requested.

“What’s a human?” asked Dinky, “And who’re you talking to?”

“That’s a good question, Dinky,” said Derpy, “I can’t really describe what a human looks like well, but if it helps you can think of them as aliens that walk on two legs and have graspers on their front limbs.”

“Neat,” said Dinky, “Can you get your leg off my eyes already, mom?”

“Not until I can be sure you won’t be tainted until you’re at least thirteen,” said Carrot Top.

“This is butts,” said Dinky.

“Are you going to answer her other question?” said Amethyst Star.

“Yeah,” said Written Script, “I’m so confused.”

“Man, I’m so confused,” said Atom, “I guess that’s what I get for only being able to listen to half a conversation.”

“Shut up, Atom! I’m trying to explain things to my friends here!” said Derpy, “Anyway, I was talking to humans who are helping me with my situation. Carrot Top, do you remember all those times when I asked you if you ever wondered what’s real?”

Carrot Top stopped and thought for a bit, her younger daughter still trying to escape her grasp.

“Yes, I always answer no,” said Carrot Top.

Derpy smiled in that at least looked melancholic.

“I asked that because in my dreams I go to another world that seemed just as real as this one,” said Derpy, “The world would seem impossible from your world’s perspective, and your world seems impossible from say the guy sitting in the room with my human bodies perspective, but both worlds turned out to be real.”

“You live a ‘dual life’ then, huh?” said Written Script.

“Carrot Top, please slap your husband in the back of his head,” said Derpy.

“Can do,” said Carrot Top, slapping him with the leg not covering Dinky’s eyes.

“Aw butts, I thought mom’d need to use her right hoof to do that,” said Dinky.

“Nope, dad’s on her left,” said Amethyst Star.

“Butts,” said Dinky.

“Today we able to make our first big break-thru,” said Twilight Sparkle, “We now have immediate contact between the two worlds.”

“I hope you get to visit me there soon,” said Derpy.

“Our ultimate goal is to construct a portal that connects the worlds,” said Twilight Sparkle, “but I don’t expect that to happen very soon.”

“So… are you two in a relationship then?” said Amethyst Star.

“Sorry, I just don’t find interest in such a relationship with Derpy,” said Twilight Sparkle.

“Dang, and I really liked the idea too,” said Amethyst Star.

“I’m going to send a letter to ask Princess Cadance to send over the mirror portal today,” said Twilight Sparkle, “You’re all welcome to observe the experiment.”

“We might take you up on that offer,” said Written Script.

---

Sunset took Watermelody and Golden Hazel into the kitchen. It was small, but functional. The kitchen consisted primarily of the stove and the refrigerator. There was also a pantry and drawers next to the stove. The room was just big enough for Sunset, Golden Hazel, and Watermelody to all fit in the room without having to touch each other… if they didn’t move their arms too much.

“Okay,” said Sunset Shimmer, “We already explained most of this to Watermelon D.”

“Her name is Doodoo Brain,” said Golden Hazel.

“Watermelody!” said Watermelody, “I don’t have any Ds in my name.”

“Yeah, it’s spelt W-A-T-E-R-M-E-L-O-Y,” said Golden Hazel.

“...Shut up,” said Watermelody.

“As I was saying, Watermelody already knows most of this so…” said Sunset Shimmer.

Sunset Shimmer and Golden Hazel both looked expectantly at Watermelody.

“What?” said Watermelody.

“Tell us the thing, Watermeloy,” said Golden Hazel.

Watermelody gave her a dirty look.

“Fine,” said Watermelody, who looked to the side to help herself remember, “I didn’t really pay attention to any of the boring parts, but I think the gist of it is this: Derpy’s got two bodies or something and also there’s something about waking them, her? up. Also one of them’s like some sort of alien or whatever, maybe… Oh! and they want to build a portal from her body but can’t, but they really really want to.”

Sunset Sighed.

“I guess that really is the gist of it,” said Sunset Shimmer, “but we plan on making a portal with the help of data gathered by our research of the subj- Derpy. Not to make a portal from her directly.”

“...Cool?” said Golden Hazel.

“If you really want to, you can look at Atom and me try to compare Derpy with the horse statue,” said Sunset Shimmer.

“Cool!” said Watermelody, she smiled expectantly at Golden Hazel.

Golden Hazel let out a heavy sigh.

“I’ll go get the picnic baskets,” said Golden Hazel.

“You’re the best,” said Watermelody, smug closed mouth grin still on her face.

“I sure am,” said Golden Hazel as unenthusiastically as she could.