A Star Pony Tale

by BlondeSky

Uncertainty

Chapter 6

Uncertainty

She arrived back in the warehouse and found that North was already waiting there for her. He didn't even look as though he had moved, but had instead simply waited there patiently for her return all of those hours. He smiled at her as she stepped off of the platform in a slight daze. It was like when she had teleported down, but the opposite. Instead of feeling a sudden loss of vigor she felt empowered, like she could just keep running for forever. She regained her bearings after the spur of invigoration and returned his kind smile with her own. Still, it felt false as she already missed the colorful world below. She knew that she couldn't stay there however, even after only being down there for a few hours she had already been found out to be different from the rest.

"I expect everything went well?" he inquired as she approached.

"Yes, everything went just as it should've." she promised despite the fact that it was only a half truth. Everything had gone essentially according to plan, but she couldn't shake the feeling that saying everything was perfect was untrue. She hadn't felt that there had been any hint that she was unsure of what she said in her tone, but he must have found something. The slightest glimpse of a frown came across his face for half a second, and she was certain he'd deduced that maybe it wasn't as perfect as she had claimed.

"Excellent, you can tell me of what you have learned once we return to my home." he stated simply and without any form of connotation in his tone. She tried to convince herself that she'd imagined what she had seen in his expression, but was unsuccessful. After having worked with him for the time she had she learned that he was a very sharp stallion and was smart enough herself to recognize that if there was even the slightest suggestion of a hint that she was uncertain he would have found it.

She thought about what to tell him of what she had learned, but couldn't think of a way to do so. Yes it was different, and she could recognize these differences, but it was difficult to express these differences in words. It was less organized than her own home, but still made use of the time it had. It was certainly much more colorful and vivid, but that simply wasn't enough to describe it. Was it bright? Yes, but again there wasn't enough meaning in the word to convey just what it was she was trying to. It puzzled her that she couldn't quite place this adjective the way she wanted to. None of them, while being sufficient enough to fill the blank, quite fit at the end of the thought. Being unable to complete the description the way she wanted to she settled for a less whole explanation. When asked for her thoughts she would settle for less organized and strict, but certainly resourceful, and significantly more diverse in hue. She nodded to herself as she finalized her decision on her response.

When the two ponies approached their destination she continued to repeat her response in her head so that she could answer him with complete certainty. She was determined to hide her doubts from him so that she could possibly forget them herself. She didn't like this feeling of uncertainty inside her and hoped that it would leave her soon. If she admitted it to him however she felt that it would continue to follow her wherever she went. He sat behind his desk and she sat on the other side. Straightening her posture and summoning all of her conviction she waited for him to ask his question.

"Something tells me that not everything went perfectly well." he stated simply.

"Why wouldn't it have?" she asked in response ready for him to have said that.

"I am asking you why it would not have." he replied emphasizing the two words she had combined. Her eyes widened as she realized that she had been speaking in the surface dialect as she had started calling it in her mind. In her hurry to appear unfazed she had forgotten to speak correctly only making her seem even more confused. "It is fine, it is only natural that you would feel ever so slightly disoriented after seeing what the surface world is like. It is a lot to think of. So tell me, what stood out the most to you?"

She sagged a little bit as her doubt doubled and she realized that she didn't know the answer to his question. She thought for few moments before stating the very first thing that had come to her mind after she had arrived, "The colors that there were."

"Yes, it is certainly much more vibrant than our own plain." he agreed. A silence followed as she realized he was waiting for a different answer. In truth the largest difference she had noticed was the one that she couldn't find the correct word to describe.

"It was more… more… I-I am sorry I cannot find the right word for what it was." she admitted hanging her head in shame.

"It is fine, it is a difficult thing to describe. I cannot say that I quite know the right word for it, but I understand what it is you mean." he promised her.

"Did you visit the surface world as well?" she queried in confusion.

"Yes, when I was the same age as yourself I was sent down to learn the same things that I have just sent you to learn." he told her, "Now, if you wouldn't mind telling me of your experiences in more detail." She nodded and began the story of events for him while the doubt continued to bubble around in her mind and in her heart.

-/|\-

"I see. It seems you experienced quite a lot of interaction with the ponies there." he commented as she finished.

"Yes." she agreed worried that she might have done something she shouldn't have. She never mentioned the sudden fatigue she had experienced upon arrival, and she had left the final part where they had realized she shouldn't have been there. He had stressed the importance of not being discovered and she stumbled when it came to that in her mind. Unfortunately she had made her presence known, and not only that but the fact that she shouldn't have been present in the first place. He, however, said nothing more to her. There were no words of chastisement or congratulations.

He turned to one of the drawers in his desk and pulled out a scroll from it. She recognized it as the same one from two days previously when he had first asked her of the surface world. While she had been allowed to look through most of the documents he possessed as she learned of the work he performed there were a small number she was not allowed to see. The scroll he now looked over was one of the few she couldn't read. She easily knew it from the rest due to its age. This particular scroll easily aged past the others by a very large margin. He read over it carefully and with purpose and focus. He seemed to be trying to decipher what he read as he looked it over with complete concentration. She said nothing as he did so not wanting to break his train of thought. After an amount of time she could not measure he rolled it up and shook his head in annoyance. "An old document speaking of the world in confusing riddles." he told her, "I'm afraid I don't understand it no matter how hard I try. Maybe one day you will however."

"May I see it?" she asked hopefully thinking she might be able to help.

"I'm afraid it comes with strict instructions as to who can and who cannot read its contents." he told her simply. She didn't need to be told specifically that she was on the list of those that couldn't, it was enough that he hadn't let her read it automatically. "You have had a very draining day I would expect, so you may return to your home early today. I do expect you back at sunrise however. We can assess if you might need another period of rest then." he finished. She nodded in understanding before exiting the building to head back to her abode.

As she walked along the streets to her home she thought about the doubts she felt. She didn't like this feeling of not knowing. Would her new friends miss her the next day? What was written on the scroll and why couldn't she see it? Why had she felt such fatigue and why hadn't anypony mentioned it before or after? What was the word she needed and why wasn't it in her vocabulary? She wasn't used to questioning things and it was an unsettling feeling having to do it for once. Maybe I'll understand more if I go down again, she thought to herself. Then she realized that it was a hopeful thought. She wanted a chance to go back down again. Whatever it was that she couldn't describe, she wanted more of it, and that was a fact.

Author's Note:

I've officially finished all my tests for school now and as a result should have significantly more free time on my hands. School hasn't ended yet though and I do have a bit of a busy summer as well. I'll let you guys know when things come up and I can't stick to the every other day upload schedule. Right now though everything does look good for the foreseeable future.

^_^ Thanks, BlondeSky