Twilight Sparkle Commits Suicide for Science

by AlesFlamas

To Hell and Back

Twilight and Dread had been walking in awkward silence since the memories of Twilight's adolescent years. Every step taken since then had been hurried, mostly because neither of them wanted to keep the walk going any longer than it absolutely had to. As they approached the exit to memory lane the pony princess and the reaper let out a simultaneous sigh of relief. This was definitely an experience they were both eager to leave behind them. Dread took the first step into the room on the other side of the exit, a blank white space, the only contents of which were a chair clearly designed for thinking in and an elevator door. Dread stood in front of the chair and motioned for Twilight to sit. And sit she did, trying as desperately as she could to avoid any kind of eye contact. Dread, in stark contrast, was staring at her with a gaze loaded with judgement and loathing and disappointment.

"You're reading into it a little to deeply. Honestly, I'm just trying to shame you."

"And why would that be?", questioned Twilight.

"I saw some things in there that I'm not going to be unable to unsee, Ms. Sparkle. And I've seen some pretty disturbing things in my time, so that's saying something."

"I told you not to look!"

"It's my job to look!"

"Is it your job to be a pervert? Because that's the impression I got, with all the staring you did."

"I was frozen in horror! I was alive during the first era of Discordian Chaos, Ms. Sparkle; I've seen things that would literally curdle the blood of most ponies, yet what you did still somehow manages to rank pretty high on my list of traumatizing experiences."

"Yeah, well... whatever!"

"Whatever indeed."

The two sat in loaded silence, Twilight's cheeks flushing a magenta sort of color. She'd hoped to leave that particular episode of her youth behind her and had all but forgotten about it up to this point. The shame of the newly recovered memory burned hot in her mind.

"Good. You should be ashamed. Now that that's out of the way, we can get going. Out of the chair, please."

Twilight was confused. Had they really stopped all that time, just to shame her for something she'd done on a dare when she was twelve?

"Well, normally, Ms. Sparkle, this room is used for reflection, to look back on a creature's life and decide where they belong in the afterlife. But in this, yes, we did just stop to shame you. Come now, to the elevator."

"Why though? I mean, what reason could you possibly have to... you know what? I don't care."

"Exactly. Now get in the elevator."

Twilight, as she was growing accustomed to doing, did as she was told and stepped into the elevator. There wasn't anything particularly special about it. Although, there was something eerie about the bright red button at the bottom of the floor panel. Especially since it was removed by the equivalent of at least four or five rows from the other buttons. But other than that, a normal elevator.

"Hey, Dread?"

"Yes, Ms. Sparkle?"

"What exactly is this elevator?"

"I'm pretty sure it's just a plain old elevator. It goes up, it goes down. If you meant something else, you'll have to be more specific."

"You know exactly what I meant."

"Yes, I did. But I find joy in your frustration. To answer your question, this is the After-vator. Or at least, that's what I call it. It's a portmanteau of afterlife and elevator. Get it?"

"Yeah, it's really clever."

"Never a more sarcastic statement has there ever been spoken. I could almost slip on your sarcasm, Ms. Sparkle. Anyway, it's basically an elevator that takes you wherever you want to go in the afterlife. Of course, you can't use it without the aid of a reaper."

"Of course."

Twilight watched as Dread scanned the button panel, as though searching for something. He stopped at the bottom button, the one several rows removed from the rest. He pressed it and chuckled to himself. The glow it gave off was sinister. Twilight looked at the needle that was supposed to indicate what floor you were on, just in time to see it fall past the border and disappear from sight altogether. Just where was this elevator going?

"You'll see soon, Ms. Sparkle. Very soon."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Only that we'll be arriving at our destination shortly. Tell me, Ms. Sparkle, can you feel it?"

"Feel... what?"

"The drying of the air and the oppressive heat surrounding us? Can you feel the burning in your hooves and the weight of a thousand sins on your soul? Can you hear the despaired screams of the innocents who have found themselves unfortunate enough to find themselves here? Can you, Ms. Sparkle, feel the burning hatred and anger flowing forth from the nightmare-scape that is Hell!?"

Punctuating his sentence with the wave of a hoof and a throwing back of his head, Dread stood aside from the door and seemed to want Twilight to walk through. But the doors weren't opening. So, what exactly was Twilight supposed to do here?

"Is... Is something supposed to be happening?"

"Just give it a minute."

And so she did. But the minute passed and the doors were still closed tighter than a vice grip.

"Are you sure the doors aren't broken?"

"Yes, Ms. Sparkle, I'm sure the doors aren't broken. Please be patient."

Twilight was very patient. She sat quietly on the floor, finding various ways to entertain herself while she waited. But the minutes passed on and the doors did not open. And there's only so much one can do to entertain themselves in an elevator.

"Are you sure they're not-"

"Yes, Ms. Sparkle, I'm sure. But they are stuck. Entirely different situation."

Twilight rolled her eyes. So far, her journey through the afterlife, aside from that unpleasant trip down memory lane, had been underwhelming. She wasn't sure whether this was because her guide was simply incompetent, or if she'd caught the Reapers on a bad day or what, but all in all, she was regretting killing herself if this was all she was gonna get.

"How exactly do you plan on getting the doors unstuck?"

Dread sighed in frustration. Sitting down and placing his right hoof to his temple, he closed his eyes. When he opened them about five seconds later, they'd rolled back into his head. Twilight could feel the tension in the elevator rising. Or was it just the temperature? I was starting to get awfully stuffy.

"Sateen?", Dread said to nopony in particular. "You there? Yeah, it's Dread."

Twilight was confused by Dread's babbling but it didn't take her long to realize that he was communicating with somepony telepathically, likely another Reaper.

"Yeah, the After-vator's stuck again. You know, the After-vator. I don't know Sateen, how many elevators through the afterlife could we possibly have? . . . Really? Since when? Actually, never mind. I don't care. Look, could you just come pry open the doors? No, it can't wait! . . . Fine, fine. Yes, I'm sorry I yelled. Yes, yes, I know. Look, could you just try and hurry? Thanks. . .I love you too.

". . .What was that all about?"

"Don't worry about. Just be happy we're getting the doors opened soon."

"How soon?"

As if to answer Twilight's question, the doors of the elevator began to creak and moan. The door inched open slowly, and through the crack, Twilight could a monstrous heat flowing into the cabin. It felt as if a thousand suns had decided to die in the exact same place at the exact same time. And just as quickly as the heat arrived it was gone.

"Just a little elemental barrier spell; can't have you barbecuing before you get to see anything."

"The doors were forced ajar and standing at the opening was a creature unlike any Twilight had seen. A monster, blood-red in color, with terrifyingly large horns and a stare that could pierce steel. Everything about it screamed pure evil.

"Thanks Sateen."

The creature nodded at Dread, smiled a toothy grin, and slowly lumbered away.

Twilight was almost too scared to ask, but it didn't matter. Dread knew what she wanted to know.

"That was Sateen. She's the shepherd of dark souls and gatekeeper of Deadworlds zero through ten."

"Deadworlds?"

"We'll get to that. All you need to know now is that this is Deadworld zero. You might know it as Hell."

"Hell? Why did you bring me here?"

"You wanted to learn, didn't you? Well, that's what we're here for. Go ahead, Ms. Sparkle. Stick your head out the doors, but please, don't step outside the elevator."

Twilight did as she was told, peering out of the elevator doors; the sights she beheld were horrific. The source of the heat she'd felt was immediately apparent, as, so far as she could see, the whole world was drenched in flames. And in the flames she could make out the silhouettes of creatures similar in shape to Sateen, but smaller. And what in the world was all that screaming? Was it the beasts or. . . something else? Whatever it was, their screams were certainly blood curdling.

"Allow me to adjust your vision, Ms. Sparkle."

The fires dimmed as Twilight's vision was tinted. And it was then that she saw the source of the screams. In the hands and mouts and under the feet of the monstrous creatures were humans and equines and all sorts of other species. Twilight couldn't help but stare in horror as they were crushed and ground, chewed to ribbon by sadistically sharpened teeth and claws, and, on occasion, thrown ferociously at walls, to become little more than a sickening smear.

"Gaze upon it, Ms. Sparkle, and weep. For this is Hell, where those that lived their lives in a cloud of negativity and performed acts of great evil with no remorse come to dwell for the rest of eternity, among the fire and the flames."

Twilight felt like she was going to be sick.

"It's. . . it's almost too much. . . I don't care what any of these ponies or people did in life, how could it possibly warrant this. . . this torture!?"

"Oh, how naive your kind are. And besides, you misunderstand, Ms. Sparkle. This is not where the evil come to be punished; it is where the evil come to continue their evil. The true inhabitants of Hell are not the tortured, but the torturers."

"What are you saying?"

"Spirits are not brought here to be punished by demons, Ms. Sparkle; they are brought here to become demons."

". . .Wow."

"Did I just blow your mind?"

"A little bit."

"I was hoping I would."

"So, I have a question. If the demons are the true inhabitants of Hell, then who are they torturing?"

"Projections; magical copies of who they were in life. It was originally designed as a metaphor for self-destruction, to try and teach them to feel some kind of remorse. Now we do it because it keeps them calm."

"What happens if they run out of these projections?"

"They don't. Now get your head back in here, we have other things to see."

"Like wha--it's dark! Oh buck, it's dark. Why am I so cold?"

"Oh, sorry, let me fix that."

Twilight's vision quickly returned to normal and the heat returned to her body. The spells Dread placed on her must have been incredibly powerful to have had that kind of effect.

"That they were; but they had to be. Hell's a dangerous place for ponies like you, Ms. Sparkle."

"I would assume so. Now what are those other places you were talking about?"

Dread's only response was to point at the topmost button on the panel.

"Do. . . do you want me to press it?"

He nodded.

"Well, okay then."