251861 hmm. i suppose. i'll continue on. see what happens. i do have a story i've thought up. this is more of a practice run of sorts. looking past the fact that it's "another cupcakes spinoff" what do you think of the writing, instead of just looking at the story?
It fails in the emotional department for me. Still thought it's... ok. Seeing pinkie being knocked out so fast was kind of a disappointment but hey - It was still pretty decent I thought. 251861 A lot of things have been done to death. Its inevitable so just get over it and move on.
251919 i could edit that part and make it longer? if you think that would improve the story? like i said constructive criticism and all that, so if you think it would improve the story, let me know ^_^, i need to work on emotions, i will write that down in my notes thing, thankyou sir :]
251948 Well I think it would make it more interesting but it is your story and that's just my opinion. If you wanted to make more chapters, I'd say just add an escape scene for Applejack to get away from Pinkie and start from there. You could probably make an adventure out of it if you wanted just with that. Just my idea but its your fic so do what you like to it. Actually, with what you have going on with Dash and Applejack you could make it sort of reflect on their memories more and make it more emotional (sad).
i can't believe this. i rewrote the whole thing. took me about three hours. and when i clicked save it said it had, then i clicked refresh, and it had signed me out, and deleted my work. WHY?
Gee, another "Cupcakes" side-story as a first story......
SUCH ORIGINALITY!
I'm sorry, but Cupcake side story's have been done to death!
OUT OF SAD EMOTICONS
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
251861 hmm. i suppose. i'll continue on. see what happens. i do have a story i've thought up. this is more of a practice run of sorts. looking past the fact that it's "another cupcakes spinoff" what do you think of the writing, instead of just looking at the story?
I'm sorry, but i stopped reading after the 3rd line. These stories are not compelling in the slightest.
It fails in the emotional department for me. Still thought it's... ok. Seeing pinkie being knocked out so fast was kind of a disappointment but hey - It was still pretty decent I thought.
251861 A lot of things have been done to death. Its inevitable so just get over it and move on.
251919 i could edit that part and make it longer? if you think that would improve the story? like i said constructive criticism and all that, so if you think it would improve the story, let me know ^_^, i need to work on emotions, i will write that down in my notes thing, thankyou sir :]
251877 Quite a few mistakes, but at least it's somewhat well written.
251948
Well I think it would make it more interesting but it is your story and that's just my opinion. If you wanted to make more chapters, I'd say just add an escape scene for Applejack to get away from Pinkie and start from there. You could probably make an adventure out of it if you wanted just with that. Just my idea but its your fic so do what you like to it. Actually, with what you have going on with Dash and Applejack you could make it sort of reflect on their memories more and make it more emotional (sad).
That was a pretty good Cupcakes side-story.
Finsh. Now.
252315 finish it now? is it that bad? O_o
...*sniff sniff* i think im goin to have bad dreams...
here is a tribute to rainbowdash---
may she be with us...always...
i can't believe this. i rewrote the whole thing. took me about three hours. and when i clicked save it said it had, then i clicked refresh, and it had signed me out, and deleted my work. WHY?