Chapter 4
* * *
Twilight continued to prod, but the slumbering white alicorn did not budge. Exasperated, she leveled her horn at Celestia's flank, and nudged her gently. Still she did not stir, save for a low grumbling, and a faint whisper.
“..who brought the whipped cream.”
It was then that Twilight knew the utter depths of fear.
* * *
“Thank you so much gentlemen. Remember, this is all my fault. Direct orders from a ranking officer, and all that. Please do come see me at my inevitable court martial, and have a good flight!”
Laurie and his guest proceeded through the serenely decorated main hall, footsteps and hoof taps synchronizing into a rhythmic cadence.
“Okay, if you will just wait here,” Laurie tapped a seat in the Princess’s antechamber. “I will inform Her Majesty that we have arrived. Er.. Yeah. Still cant understand me, I know.”
The interloper seated himself at Laurie’s request, reclining slightly.
Laurie approached the door to the study. He took a quick inventory of his grooming, came to attention, and rapped his hoof on the door three times with perfect courtesy. There was no response, but he could hear something in the room beyond.
"Allright then,” he said to himself as gently parted the door. “Good afternoon your Majesty, I would like to present.."
Laurie stopped abruptly. What he had to say was no longer relevant to what he saw. Entering partway through the door, he caught sight of the Princess Celestia sprawled ungracefully across the floor. Her grand and massive body the lodestone against which one perspiring purple pony persistently pushed.
"Uh.."
The throw pillow slipped across the polished stone, sending Twilight sprawling across Celestia’s slowly heaving flank. She looked up angrily at Laurie’s shocked countenance. Her eyes glared with a message; not the look of “I can explain everything!” that Laurie was so well practiced with, but something more base and savage.
I Will End You.
Laurie exited the room quickly, slamming the door behind him. He stood there, breathing heavily for a moment, before turning to look at his puzzled guest.
"I will not lie. I'm going to need a cold shower after this. You still can't understand me right? Well don't worry, it's for the best."
Just then a familiar pony rounded the corner of the grand hall, striding silently towards the antechamber with the inexorable determination of an active tectonic plate. He stopped no less than a whisker's breadth from Laurie's face, his royal blue tunic sporting the indelible stains of pink frosting and raspberry glaze.
"I Will End You," He whispered.
Laurie gulped.
From within the study, came a deep rumbling sound.
“What was that?” the dark haired pony demanded, as he glanced around Laurie’s head.
“A bear, I think.”
“Get out of my way.”
“No, no, wait!”
Laurie attempted to shield the door, tripping backwards as the other officer attempted to push past. The dark haired pony tumbled on top of Laurie as they both landed, sprawled halfway into Celestia’s private study.
They scrambled to extricate themselves - pulling their heads clear as the door slammed shut. It vibrated with the distinct *thwack* of a long polished knife embedding itself in thick varnished wood.
They both faced away from the door, staring off into oblivion. After some time, one of them spoke.
“Ah.. Captain Lancaster, is it?”
“Yes, Captain Dornier?”
“We’re both fired.”
“What?”
“Medical discharge, you see. After I finish throttling your windpipe, I’ll be gouging my eyes out with the kitchen utensils.”
“Ahhh.. right.”
* * *
“Huh.. wonder what that was all about,” Applejack mused at the panicked flailing exit of one particular brown and white pony. She elbowed Fluttershy with a wink. “Yep! Definitely not the silent type!”
“Ohh.. I hope he’s not the silent type,” she responded dreamily.
Applejack found herself halfway across the room before she could speak again, torn between a sudden urge to follow the interloper out the door, a sudden urge to distance herself from any further brain melting single-entendres, and a sudden urge to chug every bottle of cider from the top shelf in the Apple family cellar.
“Love to stay and chat, ya know - but them fields ain’t gonna harvest themselves. I’ll just be.. Ooof!”
“Ach!” The dark haired pony cried, as they collided and tumbled to the floor. “Watch where you’re going!”
Applejack was already out the door, her autopilot apology suddenly drowned out by the beating of pegasi wings and the rattling cacophony of a royal carriage launching under “wartime emergency power”.
This left the dark haired pony in a state of distress. His eyes bulged, and their fierce unfocused stare seemed to be on the cusp of channeling a torrent of raw hatred into a formidably tangible manifestation. The same raw hatred that, were it to escape the rigor mortis of his lips, would erupt forth in a deafening roar of thunder, bellowing a wordless unholy curse that would rend asunder the many souls of all life in all universes.
However, he simply appeared to be choking. On air.
He turned with a snarl, steeling himself to burst out through the door in one predatory leap. It was then that he was given pause.
If there were a terrible and abrupt end to the world, this was exactly how Captain Dornier would have dreadfully imagined it; a leering pink visage with teeth bared wide, framed by two towers of sickly sweet confections stacked like the skulls of a conquered civilization; arms stretched wide to deliver a crushing embrace to all that remained good in the world; its throat warbling with the exuberant singsong malfeasance that heralded the end of time itself. It sang, “cupcakes”.
“Oh god oh god oh god KEEP IT AWAY!”
* * *
Applejack walked glumly back into Sugarcube Corner, halfheartedly tiptoeing past the frosted shrapnel and raspberry flavored ichor that one would expect if a wedding cake were to suddenly explode in a room full of crowded people.
As she sat down to finish her untouched breakfast, she turned to Fluttershy.
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d reckon you were part unicorn,” she said, patting her forehead with a hoof.
Fluttershy gasped, feeling her own forehead. “What makes you think that?”
“..Forget it.”
* * *
“We have a problem.”
“I’m looking at it.”
“No. Look around! What do you see missing here?”
“You, shortly.”
“Just shut up and listen to me!” Laurie gestured around the room. “That table needs to be turned sideways and moved to the center. Equal representation of parties, and all that. There’s no tea ready, those chairs have to be moved, we have to take up positions here, annnd here, and that flag in the corner needs to be unfurled and canted half-forward facing away from the door.”
Laurie threw his hooves up in exasperation. “And we need a second flag facing the opposite way on the other side! We don’t have much time!”
“What in her name are you going on about?” Dornier gestured towards the door.
Laurie turned and slapped the thick square deadweight in his satchel. “Chapter eighteen, section five! Protocol for official meetings between Equestrian Sovereignty and visiting foreign dignitaries, diplomats, or military officers! And I’m pretty sure that he’s all three.”
“Oh for the love of..”
“Listen! Duty comes before.. whatever it is you’re planning to do with a blunt kitchen utensil. Or what you’re planning to do to me, for that matter. Even if they’re probably the same thing. The point is, there will be a very important official meeting taking place in the very immediate future, and we can’t be standing around waving our campfire rations at each other when it takes place!”
The door burst open. Laurie and Dornier gasped, suddenly holding each other for protection in the face of what horrors were about to befall.
Twilight Sparkle stepped through into the antechamber. Her head hung in dejected frustration, the last traces of her energy directed in a glare at the two officers.
They held each other tighter, momentarily.
“Um.. okay. Right then..” The two distanced themselves, having quickly forged an unbreakable pact to never speak of this event again.
“Aaaghhh, it’s no use!” Twilight wailed.
“What is?”
“She will NOT wake up!”
“Perfect!” cried Laurie. “We can still do this!”
“Whaaat?”
“No time to explain. Here!” Laurie fetched the weighty slab of dog eared pages from his satchel, slamming it to the table in front of Twilight, and ruffling through the bookmarks until he found chapter eighteen.
“It’s all right there. Pictures and everything. I think I drew some annotations over in the corner there. But anyways! Please follow it to the letter!. I’m going to tell the kitchen staff to prepare some tea, and then I’ll be running halfway across the palace for another flag with the same size and insignia as that one!”
“But..” Twilight protested.
“Do it nooooooowww!” Laurie cried as he galloped down the main hallway, rounding the corner and disappearing from sight.
Dornier and Twilight looked at each other briefly, then to the interloper who had been sitting patiently through the whole exchange.
It raised one hand, waving it gently back and forth.
The greeting it issued sounded not unlike a wheel-less carriage plowing a furrow through a leafy compost-rich forest floor.
* * *
“Now what the hay was that all about?” Rainbow Dash wondered aloud.
They surveyed the damage caused by the dark haired pony’s sudden rush out the door. The first collision had sent Pinkie Pie flying, to say nothing of the twin plates of desserts. The next collision was not seen so much as heard, as the officer had barreled straight into Applejack a second time, outside of Sugarcube Corner.
There had been Words exchanged, followed by an indignant stream of noise that steadily diminished as it raced down the street.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders listened with eyes wide and mouths open.
“How would a whole bag of oats even fit there!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed.
* * *
Laurie returned triumphantly, brandishing the temporarily appropriated flag like a lance. The furniture of the antechamber had been moved into a rough approximation of the drawing in the Royal Guardpony field manual - even though the layout described was a few castles old.
“Are you happy now?”
“What, are you kidding me!” Laurie pointed at the tray of cups surrounding the steaming kettle. “No, no! Ahh.. Wait, perfect. Let’s move that stationary desk just outside of the room. That way when it comes time for tea, we can bring it in properly. Not have it staring them in the face during the initial meeting, or make them wait while we dash back to the kitchen. Even says so in the manual!”
“Un-rutting-believable!” Dornier turned back to Twilight. “Ah, pardon the language, Miss.”
Twilight stared blankly, barely noticing the minor impingement on her ears.
Laurie propped up the flag next to the door, before pushing the small desk out into the hallway. He motioned to the interloper with a series of quick gestures, who understood them perfectly - as he got up to push a sizable potted plant against the side of the door, and planted the unfurled flag at an angle that matched the first.
“Seriously! Where do you find time to read all this crap?”
Laurie looked up angrily. “I..”
“..well I’m lonely sometimes,” he finished defensively.
Dornier guffawed. “Pffffff.. I don’t think I’ve known anyone this pathetic since I heard of that one recruit that got caught clopping off while reading a field manual.”
“Those were two entirely independent actions!” Laurie shouted. “Err. I mean.. multitasking, you know. The section on woodland survival.. Oh go to hell!”
A malevolent grin spread across Dornier’s face. One that he appeared to enjoy immensely.
Twilight sat upright, snapping the Royal Guardpony field manual shut with a twitch of magic. Slowly, she brought her hooves up to the level of her unfocused eyes, shaking gently as she sought refuge in the portion of her mind that was not responsible for conscious thought.
“Do you have one useful thing to say? Hmm? Is there anything I could expect to come out of that horn polisher that you mistakenly refer to as a mouth that could, in any way, be helpful? At all?”
“Ahem.. yes. There is,” Dornier stiffened to a position of attention and saluted. “Good afternoon, Princess Luna.”
“Oh shit!” Laurie shouted as he spun around, snapping to attention.
“Uhh..” Luna regarded them through bleary eyes.
“Ahh. Belay my last. Good afternoon, Princess,” Laurie managed carefully.
“Oh, it’s all right. At ease gentlemen. Where is Celestia?”
Twilight shook her head.
“I see.. well don’t worry. I’ll take care of it. By the way, the room looks perfect! Good job making use of the extra time,” she smiled.
“Oh, and Captain Laurie, right? Um. Don’t worry. I like to read books too. Ahem, just not always in that way.”
Laurie stood mortified, but cocked an eye at the Princess’s choice of words.
“I mean..” her indigo face tinged with the slightest flush of red. “Twilight likes to read a lot too! You two should probably trade books sometime!”
The awkwardness in the room had manifested itself in a metaphoric three-way reach around.
Luna pushed open the door to the study.
“Huh? How’d that get stuck there?” She turned back to face the trio, plus guest. “I’ll have her out in five minutes. Be ready!”
The room was quiet, with the three ponies waiting for the arrival of Celestia.
One pony felt as if he was going to die of embarrassment.
One pony felt as if he was going to die from suppressed laughter.
One pony was in her happy place.
From behind the door, Luna’s voice could be faintly heard.
“Wake up sleepyhorn! Come on, lets go. I know you can hear me. What? No, I’m not the Phillydelphia Clydesdales! How would that even..? ARRGHH!”
There was a sound of a short running start, followed by the sound of two heavy sacks thrown together. Again. And again.
It was a very long five minutes.
* * *
“Are you okay, Miss?”
Pinkie looked up, still dizzy from her encounter with Captain Dornier. When any two ponies meet in such a manner, physics always wins.
“I invented the hippogryph!” Pinkie exclaimed, dispelling any indications of permanent brain damage.
“Ehh..” remarked the grey pony, not entirely convinced.
“Ooohh. Who are you?”
“Ahh, forgive me,” the grey pony said, turning one leg sideways and bending it into a crescent shape. “I’m ..”
“No, I mean who are you? I’ve never seen you before. Are you new here?”
He thought for a moment, letting his leg fall back into a normal stance. “Yes and no. I don’t live here, but I am visiting. I’m.. a reporter. And I’ve heard that something rather interesting took place last night.”
“Oh..” Pinkie’s bubbly smile returned. “Would you like a cupcake?”
“I would be delighted.”
* * *
Princess Celestia smoothly parted the doors to her study, her horn glowing slightly with the trivial effort as she entered the antechamber. Her body cast a gentle luminance across the room, as she stepped forward looking remarkably refreshed and envigorated.
“Captains, I see that everything looks perfectly in order. Very well done.”
Laurie allowed the hint of a proud smirk to cross his face, which prompted Dornier to respond with an imperceptible roll of his eyes.
“And Twilight Sparkle, my most talented and trusted student, I am so glad to have you here for this occasion.”
Twilight nodded weakly.
“I was having the most wonderful dream earlier. I think you might have been in it too! I simply must tell you all about it..” Celestia pondered her next words carefully. “..sometime later.”
Twilight hid her emotion behind the veneer of a smile. This was surprisingly easy, since horses and ponies lack the physiological capability to vomit.
“And now, to business,” she approached the table confidently.
The interloper stood across the table. He bowed respectfully, to which Celestia responded in turn. The alicorn extended her hoof, which was met by a firm grasp. They shook for a second time, with practiced fluidity.
“Luna, if you would please.”
Princess Luna approached the table alongside her sister. A long polished knife slid out from an ornate holster strapped across her foreleg, levitating over the table and laying itself down between the two parties.
Celestia nodded to the interloper, as she put forward one hoof. Her leg could not twist far enough to turn over completely, but the gesture was understood. The otherworldly visitor extended his hand with the palm facing upwards.
The knife rose into the air with a delicate precision, hovering directly over the outstretched palm. Their eyes locked together as the sharpened tip traced a fine line across the skin, which slowly welled up with a single drop of blood.
The interloper winced slightly, but remained still.
The knife rose again into the air between them, flipping upside down. Celestia closed her eyes, and lowered her head. It spun in a circle, coming to rest gently against the base of her horn.
It slid down the length, shaving away a glowing filament that curled into a loose spiral. The strand of Celestia’s horn floated down lazily, landing in the visitor’s outstretched palm. She braced her wings against the edges of the table, lifting both hooves to meet the interloper’s clasped hands.
They stayed that way briefly, as Celestia intoned a long and soft incantation. As she finished, her horn gently descended, pressing firmly against the crown of the his head.
There was a soft flash of light, and a brief silence that left everyone’s ears slightly ringing.
Princess Celestia returned her hooves to the floor, smiling at the visitor. The two stared thoughtfully at each other for some time, before Celestia spoke.
“Hello.”
The interloper’s eyes widened slightly, but not with alarm or undue amazement. It raised one hand, gently waving it side to side.
“Hello,” he replied.
The other ponies stared with rapt attention.
“I believe there is much we have to talk about,” Celestia stated. “But first, could I offer you tea?”
“I would be delighted.”
* * *
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Wow, that took long enough. Got a bit hung up near the end of the chapter, but I managed to get through without any awkward filler.
Actually this whole chapter is awkward filler.
ENJOY!
Looking forward to the next one.
I want some tea now..
Was...that i what I thought it was?......
....
moar please
Bueno.
13581
Which I?
The interloper sounds like the coolest looking badass of all time
I imagine the interloper to have a five o clock shadow and glasses and unkempt brown hair...
I will admit that it does jump around a bit, particularly going back and forth between Canterlot and Sugarcube Corner a half dozen times in not-necessarily chronological order. Although I felt that helped break up the two scenes without turning each into a giant ham-fisted wall of text - and revealing certain details out of sequence adds to the humor, at the slight expense of making it a little difficult to follow.
Laurie isn't really an OC self insert or anything, although I would be lying if I said I didn't have a few things in common. I think he's a pretty solid supporting character, and a wellspring of comic relief. He and Pinkie make a nice duo as the Prince of Profanity and the Queen of Caffeine.
Also, despite the reams of innuendo and subtle sauciness in CH4, that's mostly there just for the comedy value, rather than turning this into a clopfest. The rest of the story is going to be a bit more in line with the original description, now that I've finished the whole introduction of the Interloper.
First up.. "A Beautiful Derp".
Hope everyone enjoys it.
(FEED ME YOUR COMMENTS)
I have no godly idea what the hell is going on but I'm amused as all hell nonetheless. Also, Celestia's awesome.
welp, i read ch. 1-4 in one sitting and i still want MOAR.
Agreed. MOAR PLEASE!
lol I ♥love it♥
.......
HE TALKS!!!! XD
I thought he was NEVER going to speak.
Also... having fun, Celestia?
I love how you constantly bring the characters into always situations. Very nicely done! Can't wait for more!
God this is hilarious. Words cannot describe my laughter
what, with Trollestia, those awkward silences and the descriptions of Pinkie Pie by the guards.
Good news everybody!
Despite not getting a lot written on Chapter 5 (motorcycle carburetor needed some tender loving care) last night, I did manage to think out some of the mechanics behind the basis for the overall plot, and it is good.
And by good, I mean "dear christ, that's horrifying".
There will be a line somewhere in the next few chapters that a savvy physics student might notice, and declare to be an error on the part of the author. It's a feature, rather than a bug.
Thank you so much for your appreciation, btw! Love it!
Btw, was the "part unicorn" joke a bit too subtle, or just enough?
And, i haven't understood the joke at all ..
But .. I AM confused very often in this storie .. hard to read for someone who isn't native speaking english
But .. i think that's why i like it so much!
So I Googled "hippogriff myth" and... "The hippogryph is the result of the rare breeding of a male gryphon and a filly." And Pinkie Pie claims to have invented one...
Also, I loved the dialogue concerning books
Also, I loved the dialogue concerning books
14209
14203
The joke refers to fluttershy exhibiting a horn-like mannerism.
9733 do you have a set design for the interlopers armor, or a you trying to keep elements of it vague to make us the readers imagine our own versions?
14826
The interloper's suit is ostensibly designed for fixing holes in starships, but it's very good at making them as well.
The protrusions on the helmet are designed to give greater situational awareness, provide standoffs for communication transmitters, wide binocular range finding, etc. The "dragon snout" is a miniature airlock for the wearer's hand. The extra set of arms mount around the hips with hydraulic actuators mounted dorsally on the spine. Sort of a "jaws of life" in reverse.
Fluttershy's suit will be a lot more interesting.
Derpy's cutie mark describes her special talent perfectly.
14858 Damn, I was way off. So it's more of a tool. I always got a Dead Space vibe while reading about it.
That.......Wassssss......AWESOME.
Wow... just wow. This story is not only vividly imaginative, but very well written too. The jumping around might make it harder to read in some places, but I feel like it makes the work more sophisticated. Fantastic job. I'm going crazy waiting for chapter 5.....
CH5 is starting to make some headway. Took a little while to get started, since I was busy planning out Ch 6,7,8 at the same time - and how they tied together.
Also, "Green Hopper".
Nice story so far, even if a bit confusing sometimes. There's just one thing: didn't Celestia say in previous chapter she was gonna have Twilight perform the spell?
15863
Yes - currently writing out the scene that explains this. What she gave to the interloper is a passive and limited variant of the aforementioned spell, along with imbuing him with just enough magic to allow it to actually work.
So, while the interloper can talk with any pony now, it only works so long as they're discussing terms that they both have some familiarity with. The spell/artifact (do I smell a Macguffin) that Twilight gets to use would potentially feel like wiring an OC-3 directly into your brain, and trying to read large chunks of wikipedia at once.
Oh, but she wants to learn so much..
This sort of ability, despite the best of intentions, is not the sort of thing that you'd ever want your leaders to have or use. Let's see how long that lasts.
This is greatness, can't wait for more!
Found this cute Fanfic just now. I am intruiged and can't wait for the next chapter. Very well written. I can see you put a lot of heart and effort into this. Please keep going, this will get (and is already getting) epic. Congratulations. You have just found one hardcore fan from Germany.
This story lacks any serious characters. Aside from the events of the first chapter, everything has been happening in a 'zany' manner. The military soldiers, the royal sisters, the mane 6, everypony is acting silly. There's no serious characters or events for contrast. If everyone and everything tries to be funny with no seriousness (or normalcy or what have you) to compare, the story eventually stops seeming funny. I'm concerned that this story is going to start to grating on my nerves with this, which would suck because I'm really liking the premise so far.
I'm not suggesting you completely stop or even reduce the amount humor, it's just a bit jarring going from the awesome pace the first chapter set to this every-single-scene-is-loony-tunes-zany pace. For all this complaining, I really do like this so far, and I'm going to be keeping track of this one.
16362
The whole first arc has to deal with meeting the Interloper, and setting up some events for later. Admittedly this does involve bouncing around between a lot of characters, who happen to be split up between a few different areas. Now that we've gotten that out of the way, we can focus on individual interactions.
The original idea for the story started with the interloper meeting Celestia. That's obviously not the best way to start off, so I backed up a bit to consider how he would arrive in Equestria in the first place. Getting from there to here ended up filling out 4 chapters. Laurie pretty much came out of nowhere too. I figured that leaving some palace officer stuck in the middle of the woods with a broken carriage was a bit of a loose end, so I gave him a few lines, and it just steamrolled from there. Good thing too, because I really had no idea what to do with Pinkie, or the whole population of Ponyville that ended up in the forest, up to that point.
I'm glad you liked the fast and serious pace of the first chapter. Fluttershy's story arc is going to have that in spades.
16638
You asked for it!
"Are you sure you want to do this? I said I can teach you to fly, but you have to have the right motivation to really learn it. Showing off in front of your friends, or trying to impress some pony just really isn't the right reason, and it could end badly if you're not completely committed to it"
"Oh.. you're probably right," she stared dejectedly at the steel deck. "You did say it can be dangerous, and I don't think I could do that. I'm sorry."
"Hey now, don't be sad. Do you still want to take a look at it, after we came all the way out here?"
She nodded weakly, her head still hanging in shame.
"Aww, cheer up a bit. I think you'll find this to be pretty neat."
He tapped at the glass PDA, and the bay door quickly rattled open. His mouth hung open, suddenly at a loss for what he planned to say.
"Umm. Is that what people fly in?" she asked nervously.
What stood before them looked less like a ship, and more like an unidentifiable blackened husk.
"Oooh.. wow.." he breathed. "It said there was a ship. This thing looks like it got lost on the way to the smelter! Not even good for parts!"
He tapped furiously at the PDA.
"Now this is interesting. There is a flight manifest here. Hmm. No. That can't be right. It landed? Landed! Like this? Ohhh, ho ho, no. Look at this!
Engine two reports inoperative. It's practically welded into a single piece! The other engine reported FOD ingestion before losing all sensor input. That's probably why," he pointed at a jagged strip of metal running along the side. "Its not even there anymore!"
"Do you know what happened?" She asked, staring awestruck at the twisted wreckage.
"Let's see," he looked back to the glass tablet. "Hmm, that's an odd name for a dropship. Anyways, it says it landed unpowered. Still not sure how that could even happen. Manifest says.. oh holy hell, I didn't know you could stuff that many people in one of these things!"
"People?"
"its a medevac dropship. It rescues people from dangerous places, often putting itself in harms way. I think that's what happened here," he observed dryly.
"And the people?"
"Saved from whatever this thing tried to get away from."
He continued to look through the manifest.
"Oh jeez, this just gets better. Nearly every temperature sensor on the hull has been completely burned out. Mind you, not before recording temperatures over 6000 degrees.. repeatedly, I might add. The only sensors that didn't get burned out are inside the bay itself. It never got past 115. That's pretty hot, mind you - but survivable. Everybody inside there.." he pointed at the cavernous unlit space just beyond the ramp. "Probably made it out alive."
Fluttershy stared reverently, trying to take in the number of lives saved through the ship's sacrifice.
"Hmm. No ordinance offloaded. Was it armed? Ahh. Apparently it was. Code 005 here. This thing flew out armed to the teeth, and came back completely empty. Now that bird threw some punches on it's last trip!"
"Ordinance?"
"Weapons. Missiles, rockets, auto cannon rounds, chuff, chaff, flares, ECM decoys, area-effect anti-personnel clusters, flak rounds, anti-laser reflective smart dust.. the works."
"For hurting people? Why.."
"For saving lives. There's not much room for negotiation when you're fighting your way back to orbit."
She sat for a moment, thinking.
"Wow, this is just unbelievable. Aft frame members are nearly 10 cm out of tolerance. I've never seen them go past 10 millimeters! And look at this.. forward and aft RCS are completely gone. Stabilizer units.. oh, that can't be right," He ran into the hanger, past the squat bulk of the craft. "Ohh! Well that explains it! They're gone! The whole tail section is gone! What the hell! This thing landed like this? Unbelievable!"
Fluttershy slowly approached the Interloper.
"So this ship saved lives?"
"Quite a few, if this is anything to go by." He tapped the PDA.
"I think.. that's something I wish I could do," she hung her head. "But I don't think I could, and I don't think this ship can do anything either."
"Hmm? Oh, don't worry, this could be fixed up. Hell, the onboard fab could even spit out a brand new one in a few hours. But what about you, are you sure you would want to try something like that? It could be dangerous."
She looked up, nodding slightly.
"Ahh.. well that's the spirit. We would have to fix it up first. A pilot that doesn't know their ship inside and out doesn't belong behind the stick. Do you think you could take care of something like this? Down to the last detail, I might add?"
"Well.. I know I am good with animals, and how to care for each of them. Big and small. I could care for something like this, if you could teach me," she smiled.
"It would be difficult. There's a lot to know before you could even step foot - er, hoof behind the controls of something like this."
She nodded firmly.
"And I'm not going to lie. It will be dangerous. You see this? Whoever brought this thing home was damned good, damned, brave, and damned lucky!"
Her head drooped slightly, but still nodded.
"Hmm. Well, if you still want to go through with this, what do you think you'd name this piece of.. er, this bird."
Fluttershy looked back and forth across the length of the wrecked ship. After a few moments, she knew exactly what it reminded her of.
"Could I call it Green Hopper?"
The PDA fell to the deck with a clatter.
"Wait, wait, what did you say?"
"Green Hopper?" she looked confused by his startled appearance. "I keep some frogs in the swamp behind my house. I thought it looked a little bit like one."
"Ahh.. " he quickly picked up the PDA, looking back to the beginning of the manifest. He stared for a few moments, before looking back at the tortured mass of burnt metal, then back to the delicate yellow haired pony next to him.
"Is there something wrong?"
He couldn't speak for a short time. Eventually he turned off the PDA, and placed it in his pocket.
"No, no. It's fine," he gestured back up to the looming mass. "Green Hopper it is."
"Are you sure it's all right?"
"Yes," he sighed, before turning back to look at her. "It looks like we have some work to do, and I have a feeling that I can't take 'no' for an answer."
(Sent from my android phone in a Costco parking lot. Expect this somewhere in the next few chapters.)
Oh my GOD It's starcraft! I should have known! At least I think it is! I'm even more excited now!
Good/bad news - didn't get anything done over the weekend due to replacing my car's water pump, and finding a few other related bits that were almost completely rusted through. At least now my car doesn't leak coolant like an incontinent poodle in a territory marking contest.
On the other hand, fleshed out the Fluttershy / Interloper arc considerably. There's a bit of this,
some of this, 
a chapter spanning crowning moment of epic 
and a character building moment when she realizes the implications of her actions, what she's seen, and the difference she made in the grand scheme of things that leaves her a bit 
Hope I'm not spoiling anything..
17620 At first i thought it was a Halo crossover because in the first chapters there was a line that said "His armour made for making holes in starships" I was all
all of a sudden and i was like AWWWW YEEAAH SPARTAN BABY! , but after reading the other bits i found out that it wasnt Halo so i became
but now im more interested.
MOAR
(Avehand1@gmail.com)
Still coming along with Ch5. Most of the way done by now. Been a bit busy with emergency car/motorcycle repairs, beating Oracle RAC into submission, and tying up loose ends in the Fluttershy arc.
I don't want to spoil things any further.. but imagine if you will, a philosophical conversation regarding the difference between predator and prey, followed by an unexpectedly ironic twist.
A pneumatic bayonette may be involved.
Also, this is more physics homework than I ever did in college. Tactical physics homework!
18415
Yes! I enjoyed the first 4 chapters, I read them in about 50 minutes.
Sorry about the wait. I should be finishing up CH5 today.
In the meantime, here's something else that you might find interesting (random excerpt from many chapters ahead).
hl=en_USEnjoy!
19773
YES!
19847
Was the excerpt pretty good btw
19851
Yeah, it was pretty good.
Sorry for the late response, but I was playing some TF2 and was away for awhile.