a Sudden Train Ride to Hoofington

by bearcat

Meeting

"I really think I'm enjoying our group vacation." Fluttershy said hopefully, pulling moss out of her mane for the tenth time this morning.

From behind her, Rarity looked up at the sky through her opaque, saddle mounted parasol. "Would that be because of the oppressive heat, dear heart, or the complete lack of roads?" Rarity finished by wiping the sweat from her brow, also for the tenth time today.

From above the group, having less trouble dodging the low hanging, moss covered branches, came Rainbow Dash's retort. "C'mon guys! It's just like something straight out of a Daring Do novel. We'll wri-" but was interrupted by the dense jungle. Dash spent a moment spitting out the cobweb she had nearly inhaled before returning to her prior concept. "We'll write our adventures down and publish it! We can call it Daring Do and the Strange Invaders."

Twilight Sparkle tried to push her fears and confusion aside for her brash friend. Summoning a little enthusiasm, Twilight said "You can't really do that because the author pony is considered to own the name Daring Do; besides -" Twilight saw Dash drop to the ground, only to jump back up beyond and behind the next low hanging limb. "Daring Do always trekked alone, but we've got a whole party with us today."

To her right, Pinkie exclaimed "And I love parties! Even if they're under false pretenses!"

A groan escaped Applejack, who was at the front, kicking at vegetation with one end and slashing with her machete at the other end. "Yer not s'posed to 'member that, Pinkie. Not ou' loud." Her enunciation constrained by the large tool in her mouth.

Rainbow Dash, her form shrouded by the foliage said, "If you ponies want to turn tail I'll gladly adventure my way aloGAH!" Suddenly Dash was visible again as she fell pell-mell onto Applejack's back, frantically brushing what appeared to be a nest of baby spiders off her face. Sputtering for the second time in as many minutes she turned to the earth pony pinned beneath her to ask "Hay do you have another of those?" eyeing the machete.

"Nuh-uh." was all Applejack managed before standing again, brushing aside Rainbow Dash who was still pawing frantically at her coat.

Free of her own freeloaders, Dash said "It's gonna take a long time to reach the beach at this rate. Any suggestions for speeding us up?"

Twilight saw Applejack cut a branch down and, now slack-jawed, drop the machete. "Don't think we'll need to go all the way to the coast to find what we're lookin' for, girls." She sidled out of sight through the path she had made, and the others scurried to look.

What Twilight found was a circle of blackened ground. No vegetation but no smell of ash or smoke, either. Perhaps three hundred hooves across, in the center there stood a three story house not unlike many thatched roof buildings seen in Ponyville. But this one was using latticed steel everywhere there was supposed to be a weight bearing wooden post, and the roof was shingled with very shiny plates that might possibly be steel except Twilight had never seen steel polished until it was white, as this roof was. It was not a mirror-finish; she couldn't see the trees, or clouds above them reflected in the roof the way a mirror finish would have allowed for.

Twilight called out with trepidation, and as much volume as she could muster. "Uhm ... Hello? Anypony here?"

The front door flew open, and a unicorn stallion the color of faded jungle moss staggered out, nearly tripping over the steps. His horn started glowing and by the taste of its magic Twilight would need a good shield spell in about three seconds. But then he squinted, and the magic faded away. Still holding her shield spell in her mind, Twilight strode forward a few paces, and called again. "Good morning, sir. My name is -"

The stallion bellowed out "Are you from around here, or not?" His horn started glowing again, but Twilight could sense this was a finding-spell. Still holding her shield in check she watched as his tangled and disheveled forelock, an unfortunate shade of deep yellow, was whipped about by his sudden head motion, his spell having directed him to the top of some trees about ninety degrees around the circle. Behind his ears, his tangled, disheveled mane was a bright blue. This time his offensive spell lashed out without warning or preamble. Something screeched in pain as the top of the tree erupted into flames. Turning to face his handiwork he shouted, magically augmenting his voice further. "I said stay home! Burning tarnation, how many of your doors do I have to close!"

Fluttershy was tapping rapidly on Twilight's shoulder. Turning to her friend, she saw a look of utmost terror on Fluttershy's face as she pointed with a hoof at the unicorn's side. It took a moment before Twilight saw what was so unnerving. Wings. The tall unicorn stallion had wings.

It appeared that a drunken and angry alicorn had taken up residence in the southern reaches of the Everfree Forest and was slowly burning it down.

Twilight cleared her throat, and was going to try again to introduce herself, but was cut off by Rainbow Dash, floating fifteen hooves above her. "That's real impressive. Do you need help chasing these things or should we just set fire to the whole forest?"

The alicorn looked blankly at Rainbow Dash. Not squinting, not magicking, Twilight thought it looked more like a thousand yard stare. After most of a minute of awkward silence, the stallion finally spoke. No longer using his angry voice but sounding like a lost colt, he said "How are you staying up there? Those wings don't look big enough to hold you."

"They're the same size relative to me that your wings are to you. Can you fly?" Dash accused the stallion.

He shook his head. Shaking his blue mane a time or two, he managed to unfurl his wings, holding them somewhat awkwardly out from his sides. They moved arrhythmically, out of sync from each other, and then stopped. He turned to look at his left wing, and watched it carefully fold itself back against his side. He then repeated the process for the other wing that was still held stiffly parallel to the ground until he folded it, watching every joint bend into place.

Twilight saw him swish his tail. It had that same unfortunate yellow and bright blue laid side by side, but much more faded than his mane. Rarity leaned over and whispered "I don't think he owns a brush or a comb. Might not even know how to bathe."

Gently pushing her friend away, Twilight Sparkle tried again to introduce herself "My name is Twili-"

She was interrupted when the alicorn noticed his house, and blurted out "Do you know how this got here?" the sound half-way between his angry- and his lost- voice.

Fluttershy tried to compliment him on his house, but Twilight guessed she hadn't spoken loud enough to be heard. Giving up on introductions for the time, Twilight asked him "Was it here when you got here?" She didn't really think it had been, but as the blank expression turned towards her, he shook his head, indicating a 'no'. "Then, I think you magicked it into place."

Perhaps something had damaged the alicorn's memory. As the pony turned to examine his house, she noted his cutie mark. It was a burning crescent shape, perhaps a moon, or just a shadow, and a twisting line attached to one point, and had two lines in the middle of it. It looked like nothing so much as a farming tool made out of a new moon, set on fire.

Finishing his circle, he smiled, and said sarcastically "Where I came from there is no magic. I'm not sure I believe it's here, either." At which point his horn glowed, and his door slammed shut and every window was illuminated. Two record players could be heard to begin an under-powered warbling of whatever tune was sitting on their turntable. Hearing the noise he looked over his shoulder, and examined his house. Shrugging, he turned back to Twilight Sparkle and his house de-energized.

By this time Fluttershy was crouching behind Twilight, peeking out between her and Rarity's mane to watch the bizarre procession. "Well, then. Good sir, as an advanced magic student, and pupil of princess Celestia herself, let me assure you that the land of Equestria, where you're standing, has magic. In fact, I'll say again that I think you accidentally spelled your house into place."

"Magic EVERYWHERE!" shouted Pinkie, seemingly teleporting a bundle of confetti into her hooves so she could throw it into the air.

"My name is Twilight Sparkle," Twilight finally said, and was moderately sure it had been heard. "And these are my friends," Twilight pointed out each pony as she said their name. She had to surprise Fluttershy by jumping aside quickly, thus exposing the brilliant pink and yellow pegasus for her introduction, but Twilight stepped quickly back into her prior spot to help shield her shy friend.

The stallion squinted at the last pony introduced, Applejack, and then he sighed. He tried to say something but then stopped, and closing his eyes he sighed again. On the third try, he said "Call me Crescent War-snath."

Nearly bouncing with excitement, Pinkie Pie said "Forgive me for being nosy, but what in Equestria does your cutie mark MEAN?"

He turned his head carefully, and examined his flank. Turning back to examine Pinkie Pie with his thousand yard stare, Applejack added "She means, what's yer one special talent. What're you really good at?"

Turning to face the farmer, he squinted, tried to speak, and failed. Again, he closed his eyes, seemingly oblivious to the sound of a burning limb as thick around Twilight's neck, finally burned through from the fire spell a moment before, and now crashing into the underbrush somewhere behind him. Its flames were doused by the fall but it charred everything it touched and the embers were still crackling. As he was almost whispering, Twilight found herself needing to lean much closer, to hear him over the sound of the local brush fire. "My skill set is no longer needed. Not at home where I came from, and not here in a land with more magic that it can shake a heuristic at." Eyes open now, he raised his head and looked around him, as if some other ponies might be just outside the circle, eavesdropping.

Speaking with his angry voice, as he had when he first staggered outside, he challenged the surrounding forest. "My mark is to be the one who modifies the argument. I cut down those I choose, and I redirect them to another place. I am the farm implement thrown into the machinations of the fight." Everyone dropped to the ground as he whipped his horn to his left and released a powerful explosion spell. "AND TARNATION TAKE YOU ALL. I LIVE HERE NOW." But his words were lost in the deep bass rumble of the explosion, which set the ground to shaking despite detonating fifty hooves above the ground.

Crescent seemed drained again, satisfied that his inner demons were not extraverting themselves right at the moment. Twilight still hadn't seen anything for him to cast a spell at. She was considering his words, when Pinkie said them out loud. "You modify the argument?"

Crescent dully turned his head towards Pinkie. "Modify?"

Applejack, standing again, said "Yeah. You said you modify the argument."

Crescent chuckled before asking "You mean I can start, or stop a fight? That's certainly unique, isn't it." Chuckling to himself, he repeated "modify the argument" under his breath before saying aloud "Would you all like to come in for some coffee?"

Before any of her friends said anything, Twilight answered with "Oh I'm afraid we sort of have a tight itinerary to keep on our vacation. But maybe we can stop by for a little longer tomorrow?" She tried to sound sheepish, but was afraid she might just sound nervous. Mostly because this whole string of events left her feeling very nervous.

Crescent turned and walked up the three steps to his front door. "I'll be here. At least I would expect so." Still staring at his closed door, Twilight guessed he was squinting again as he spoke. "Did any of you see how I opened this, before?"

Rarity graciously levitated the latch downward, pulling the curved handle outward. "Like that, I believe. Tomorrow, then?"

Crescent began to walk through the open door, and also waved a forehoof over a shoulder, meaning to wave goodbye but his wings came unfolded and he cursed when he banged them into the rather solid doorframe. Again folding his wings one at a time, he disappeared as the search party turned and began the trip back to their hotel room in Hoofington.