Rainbow's Choice

by Metaphor

Chapter 9

The rest of the day passed in a wash of blurred images and numb feelings. The intricate patterns made by the paint on the ceiling of Rarity’s spare room were so clear in her mind she could have sketched them out blindfolded. Rainbow had long since passed the crying stage now but her coat and pillow were still drenched in tears and the occasional sob and whimper still punctuated the still air in the room.

How long had it been? A few minutes? A few hours? A few days? Rainbow couldn’t tell and nor did she even care. It had been a larger hammer blow than she could have imagined. No pony had ever said they hated her before; of course some had commented on her being annoying or egotistical or too laid back but hate? No this was a new sensation for Rainbow and it was only made worse by the pony who had said it.

Scootaloo, a filly who she had always considered a friend…and over the last few months a sister. She wanted to show her the joys of flying, to help her realise her true potential…and yet. Scootaloo’s words floated back into her head. It was true, despite so many promises she had made to the young filly she could recall only a handful of them that she had actually kept. She was always thinking about becoming a Wonderbolt, had she really been ignoring Scootaloo that much? Was she so obsessed with her dreams that she was just forgetting about everything else?

No! She was the bearer of the element of loyalty! She had helped to defeat Nightmare Moon, Discord and many other threats to Equestria. And yet, these achievements seemed to dwindle when she examined the day to day life that she led. Everyday her friends were lending a hoof to other ponies. Fluttershy cared for her animals. Applejack worked her farm. Rarity was always dashing back and forth between her fellow ponies even when she had orders piling up by the bucket. Pinkie Pie was always throwing parties and making everyone feel happy. Even Twilight was still going about her usual daily business despite her now being a princess. She was even still running the reading group at the library.

And what did she do? Sleep, eat and occasionally bust a few clouds. A weather pony, something that practically any Pegasus could do in their sleep. The more she thought about it the more she came to realise; when she wasn’t working on her own goals she didn’t do anything. She barely helped out, slept through most of the day, bragged at every possible opportunity and played pranks on any pony she could. Tears began to return to her eyes as a quiet knock on the door snapped her attention back to the real world.

“Rainbow darling?” called Rarity, “Are you ok in there, please let me in.”

Rainbow didn’t reply, instead choosing to roll onto her side and face away from the door. She scrunched up her face, trying her best to flush the fresh tears from her eyes. As she heard the door open she pulled the blankets around her even tighter than before. She listened as a set of hoofsteps approached and a pony sat down at the edge of her bed.

“Rainbow,” questioned Rarity calmly as she lay a hoof on Rainbow’s covered shoulder, “Come now, you can’t stay here forever.”

“Leave me alone,” replied Rainbow as she curled up even more beneath her blankets.

Rarity gave a short sigh and removed her hoof, “I know you’re upset my dear but you can’t stay in bed forever. You’re been up here nearly seven hours.”

“Why does it matter? Everypony hates me!”

“Everypony does NOT hate you Rainbow! Don’t exaggerate, its most unbecoming of a lady.”

“Like you don’t…”

There was a moments silence and Rainbow felt a pang of guilt race through her body as she realised what she had said.

“I’m sorry Rarity…” she whimpered quietly as she slowly turned onto her back and looked up at Rarity.

The unicorn looked a little forlorn and thoughtful, a small but sad smile resting on her lips.

“It’s alright deary,” she replied after a moment, faking a large smile as she did, “No harm done.”

“Rarity…what am I going to do?” asked Rainbow with a sniff.

“About Scootaloo?” replied Rarity, “I’m sure she will come around in time my dear. That little filly has been through a lot in her life and she’s got so many insecurities due to her lack of flight. I’m sure if you give her some space for a while you’ll be able to talk to her about your decision.”

“Do you think I’m a good pony?”

Rarity didn’t respond immediately, she sat staring at the wall and Rainbow could almost see the cogs of her mind turning over as she tried to formulate her response.

“Yes, yes I do,” replied Rarity at length, “You’ve always been there for us when we needed you…well apart from that time you got Discorded…but then none of us where right in the head back then.”

“But I don’t do anything. You’re always helping ponies out…I mean you even gave me a room to stay in even though you don’t agree with what I’m doing.”

“Rainbow just because you don’t do anything directly doesn’t mean you’re not helping. You’ve inspired a lot of ponies I know and let’s not forget that little fan club of yours. And your confidence is well…something I envy.”

“You…”

“Let me be candid with you Rainbow, I will never be a great fashionista in Canterlot high society.”

Rainbow blinked hard, had she just heard the unicorn correctly.

“There are some barriers that even talent and hard work cannot breech Rainbow. It hurts to admit it to myself and it hurts even more to admit it to others. All my life I’ve aimed for that goal but I know it’s not a goal I can never reach. Oh I can try but even if I get close it will be pulled away from me, there is no way that those in power would allow a common pony such as myself to reach stardom.”

“Rarity…”

“Let me finish Rainbow or I may not be able to!” snapped Rarity, “However, when I look at you I see a fiery determination. You’ve always been a pony who never gives up, never backs down and always strives to be the very best she can be. When I think of you I can’t help but think ‘maybe I can’. Oh listen to me, I sound so silly.”

Rarity jumped slightly as she felt something touch her shoulder. Rainbow had sat up, her tear soaked face looking back at her as her hoof gently gripped her shoulder.

“Thanks Rarity…”

“Oh think nothing of it darling,” dismissed Rarity, the moment of sappiness having vanished from her composure, “Now I should head off, I have a supper to prepare. You really should come down, you never did finish lunch and I know you need to keep your strength up.”

“Rarity, wait…” interjected Rainbow as she applied a little more pressure to the unicorn’s shoulder, “Can I ask you a personal question?”

“Um…I suppose so my dear, what is it?”

“Have you ever wanted foals?”

Rarity gave a small smile, “Yes I have, many times to be honest. But life just hasn’t gifted me with that yet. I’m always so busy I hardly have time to sit down and relax never mind take time off to entertain some stallion. Looking after Sweetie Belle on occasions is hard enough for me to slip into my schedule. That said its never a chore, do you know that I actually got her to make dinner last week without completely burning it…and it wasn’t half bad either. The cooking lessons I’ve been giving her must really be helping out, I’m so proud of her. I often wonder if mom and dad felt the same way about me when I became a fashion designer or got my cutie mark.”

Rarity let out a gentle sigh as her vision drifted across the patterned wallpaper that lined the walls. For that brief moment Rainbow caught a glimpse of a life that could be. It was hard to imagine Rarity as a mother but in that instant she saw past the prissiness, the drama and the uptight reactions. She saw a caring mother and a loving family. She could hear the cries of joy as the foals played and charged around. In that moment Rainbow could feel something inside her change.

“Rarity, what should I do?” she asked quietly.

“That I can’t say my dear, it’s for you to decide…but don’t feel as if you have to decide alone. Talk to us, to all our friends and don’t make any rash decisions. This is a life changing event and you have to be sure you make the right decision…not just for yourself but for everypony.”