Dark is rather common on this site as a tag. And it doesn't seem to surprise me as to why that is. FiM can often be available to everybody, but in the wide world of sports fanficiton, many might want to make things just a little more intense.

Now, I'm not here to tell you how to write Dark stories, but I just want to say a few things so you just don't overdo it.

For starts, the mature tag. If you have a dark story that's very gory, gruesome, and will most likely use the former two to create that gut feeling that you're more than well aware of is a sign that what you're reading was probably written by somebody who needs to be locked up in the looney bin, that's fine. Cheerilee's Garden is a grimdark story about Cheerilee murdering her entire school in the midst of a play and even getting...excited...about it. Was it shunned horribly? No, it actually came out to be a very popular story, most likely because of the psychological impact but also because of the attention to detail; everything is described so...elicit, that it's mortifying, yet the story still manages to be an interesting read, that is, if you can stomach it. Anyhow, it should be important to use the mature tag, because you don't want some little kid (There are a few that roam the site) stumble upon something like that.

But so many people do dark so wrong that it doesn't surprise me why they get downvoted so much. One of the problems with doing dark is that you have to actually make it leave a lasting appeal in darkness.

For example, just describing the death may be gross, but doesn't actually reach into the reader; it doesn't grip them and frighten them, give them the feeling of suspense, of fright. If you just describe a death, you can't really be empathetic with the story's flow, you'll really just be like "oh no..." and move on.

Now, having someone attack another and brutally beat them, describe in detail how they want to make them feel the uttermost pain, and slowly hurt them, gradually increasing, until they're almost in shock from how much it hurts. Messing with their heads and truly making them understand what it's like to have a feeling of hopelessness can, if it's done right, truly grip the reader like a steel vice, and give them that understanding.

Reaching across all forms of media, electronically or not, lemme connect with a video game series, one of my favorites; Metroid.

Not entirely dark, but shown how one of Samus' archenemy Ridley torments her constantly is done well to illustrate this. Notably in the game's manga, the alien constantly alludes to Samus' mother's death, what he had to do to survive on the ruins of her colony K-2L (Eating the flesh of dead humans), and leaving her with a feeling of hopelessness, of defenselessness, and slowly rip her apart mentally before going in for the kill. Does he succeed? Nearly. But he doesn't completely make it.

Understand that it's important to toggle a dark feeling within the reader to make something dark. You must grip them with suspense and with a foreboding sense to get them to truly wonder, "What else could happen? What's their fate? Will they be all right? Will the bad guy win?"

To create a feeling of darkness, you must blot out the sun, and create a shadow of fear and empathy with the reader.

Was that all right? I've been gone for so long, my lecture-skills are a little rusty and we're slowly covering whatever things out there. I'm trying to be more active as a professor but it's hard with school and everything (As well as parents who still don't know I am a brony, so, it's tough).

IMHO, dark stories shouldn't be dark for the sole purpose of being dark (like Sweet Apple Massacre :^D); instead they should retain a general theme (adventure, slice of life etc) while being dark at the same time.

Having dark stories just because you want to write about gore and edginess and stuff shouldn't be My Little Pony.

2110179 Dark for the sake of dark isn't really a good idea whether ponies are involved or not, IMO.

2109918

I write many war-fics. By nature, most of them tend to be dark. The best thing you can do for a fic like this is not to focus on the dark itself when writing the story. The dark will come on its own.

Although the story may be bleak, disturbing, or sad, it is always good to have lulls in the action, so to say. These are great times for plot development, and for constructing the characters to be tailored to the story.

It is also beneficial to give the protagonists or whoever is the main character, some kind of goal to accomplish or a hope, or something to keep them going. In a dark fic where bad or scary things may happen, characters will need something to give them purpose to keep going.

Death and gore are effective weapons of dark genres (if used with proper marksmanship and not just spray and pray) but eventually you'll run out of ammunition for them. Another tool you can use is character depth. Write how they feel about the dark events or atmosphere, and how they respond to it. Maybe they are traumatized, maybe they are frightening out of their wits, and maybe some are even driven to fight back. Maybe a character is jaded from the dark events, including the element of their eroding character maybe useful as well.

An awesome weapon I like to use is slowly turning a really dark fic into a fic about hope or "there is a reason to fight and survive" and messages like so.

These are just gateway things though. It is up to the authors to arm themselves with these weapons.

Your friendly arms dealer.

AK-47's for EVERYPONY!

Silver out!

Ahh, bravo! I always get a tad bit annoyed when I see the Dark tag on a story with a weak sense of character development and mainly exists to point out a roll of a featured villain, who may be barely engaged within the story. Hopefully more people will take this to heart as it will be nice to take tags seriously for once.

2109918 Now, would you consider this Dark for the sake of Dark? It's a story that's been floating around in my head for awhile, and it describes a significant event in the timeline of my story universe. Short version: Humanity was at war with ponies, nobody won the war, so the humans stick to their own towns and such. (Please note, this takes place millenia before the events of MLP.) But Discord comes along to a human town and binds a young man's soul to the soul of a wolf, making him into a lycanthrope, a werewolf. The story goes on to describe his descent into madness, not focusing on his jaunts as a werewolf, but rather the aftermath of his transformations. Eventually the torturous dreams and visions force him to kill the girl he loves, and afterwards Discord considers his experiment in lycanthropy a success. Thus begins the Wild Hunt.

2111233

That certainly is quite interesting, not an approach I've observed before. However, you must bear in mind that his descent into madness should be subtle and gradual (No need for boring exposition), and it should also be shown how it affects his family, peers, etc.

2111233
So...
where are the ponies?

2113104 Hey, a wolf's gotta eat...

2112909 Of course, at first he thinks that its all a bad dream, then it gets worse over time.

2113104 They find him in the woods and mercy kill him after he slaughters most of his family and friends.

2111233 That's quite an evil take on Discord. Not that this is a bad thing, just saying.

What you should think about though is whether you really want your protagonist to be just the victim (if you consider this an idea for anything more than a one shot, that is). Some people may identify with victims, but most'd like a hero, so you might want to give him some way of fighting back (possibly even fighting that evil Discord of yours). He needs a chance. If you look at all the good tragedies out there, the hero usually goes a long way in defeating his obstacles before ultimately failing. Letting the hero be ignorant of what is happening to him is acceptable up to until roughly the 50% mark, at which point you'll have enough of the misery and the helplessness, since you, the reader, know.

Also, I'd like to object to your explanation of lycantrophy. I for myself don't believe in souls, but wolves are gentle, social creatures, not some raging monsters that go berserk for no apparent reason. The alloying of those souls then really isn't enough of an explanation for the behaviour of a run of the mill werewolf. Since you've brought up madness before, maybe a perception shift that is also a side-effect of lycantrophy might serve as explanation for the killings. Finding yourself in a body you don't know, with sensory input you can't handle might make you think of people as a threat, as creatures you don't even recognize. Just an idea, but thought I'd come up with something so I'm not just a nay-sayer.

2116021 Allow me to explain. His consciousness has been partially melded with that of a wolf, and thus he has to share his mind with aforementioned wolf. The wolf is a creature to whom human thoughts are both alien and frightening. Every few nights its consciousness is suddenly dragged out of the depths of some kid's alien mind and dropped into a confusing reality where it is in a strange form and in a place that it normally associates with danger. A human being in such circumstances would likely attack the first thing that made strange gibbering noises at it. The wolf spirit (sorry I have to say it like that, but spiritualism and souls are a decently large part of my story writing) isn't truly evil, but confused more than anything. That being said, the greater portion of the madness derives from the desires of the wolf-entity to override the human part of its mind and exist in a way that is more comfortable and well known to the wolf-entity, e.g. eating meat raw, hunting for its prey, and generally behaving in mannerisms more akin to a wild wolf. But the wolf is a logical creature, while many things that a human mind is driven to do are illogical; madness is a human flaw, not a flaw of nature.

And the merciful death was only an optional ending. The real way I want to end it is by having the werewolf make a decision to fight alongside ponies and such against the other lycanthropes made by Discord's experimentation.

Not to mention, Discord was the Satan of my story-verse. At least in the early years; interacting so much with human minds is a double edged sword, and we're the reason why he's closer to fruit-loops than actually being dangerous.

2117205 Alright, alright, you got me convinced with your wolf spirit thing. However, I'd like to dispute your very last two sentence in that paragraph:

But the wolf is a logical creature, while many things that a human mind is driven to do are illogical;

The wolf is more an instinctual creature than a logical. Indeed, its logical powers are far below that of any type of ape, corvid, dolphin or pig. Also, you draw a line where there is none; even animals have beliefs and superstitions that have no logical reason at all. One experiment confirming that was done with birds. These birds were in a cage with a button which, when pressed, sometimes activated a food dispenser. If the button yielded food or not was totaly random.
After a few days, the birds in their different cages all had developed rituals associated with the button-pressing. One would scratch a spot under its wing, another would hop 360 degree in a circle... all before pressing the button, in superstition that their behaviour had any effect on the mechanism. (I'm sorry I can't provide sources for this claim; I've seen this one in a documentary)

Madness is a human flaw, not a flaw of nature.

Again, there is no line. Humans are a product and a part of nature, therefore all their faults can be found in other animals, too. If you want to read up on the issue, psychology today has an article about animal madness. (Edit: Turns out it's rather an article about the pharmaceutical research going on in that field, but you can check out the papers in the cited sources if you're interested.) While I detest those that dismiss animals as lesser beings, like wide parts of christian theology that, in contrast to humans, do not ascribe them a soul, the depiction of the moral superior, noble animal that is unspoiled by human shortcomings is equally laughable, although more likeable.

The real way I want to end it is by having the werewolf make a decision to fight alongside ponies and such against the other lycanthropes made by Discord's experimentation.

While this is certainly more appealing than the victim-only line, I still think it's not an alltogether good solution. You have the hero emerge from victimdom to join alongside ponies to defeat... yet other victims. Even though this might be unavoidable to eliminate the threat the other lycantropes pose, it is a sorry business. If your hero does not try to fight the prime villain, maybe does not even know that there is one, I fear it will leave a hollow aftertaste and unsatisfied feeling in your readers.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to be a know-it-all here. From skimming through your stories I've got the impression that you have certain... biases... to my kin. I'm just trying to be helpful.

2118729 Yeah, I went through a phase there for a while, deep deep depression and what have you. I was going to completely rewrite some of my stories, but as I feel a somewhat normal state of mind coming over me, I've burned out.

And "biases against your kin", would that be biases against humans, or against wyverns?

2120091 I was indeed refering to the wyvern story. The description doesn't make us look good. Then, again, maybe we aren't!

2122545 It's odd, but every time I write a story about something, I become fascinated by that thing. Wyverns were just something I wanted to pick on, but then I became fascinated by the predatory possibility of such a creature. I'll have you know that the wyvern in the story I wrote manages to kill a fully grown dragon.

I've always wondered... Would crime drama featuring a serial killer be able to be considered Dark? I'm having trouble deciding (And yes, the murders drains the main character's psyche, almost driving him into madness)

2200486
yes.

A good article. I'm in the planning stages of a pretty dark fic, and there were some good tips here.

but it's hard with school and everything (As well as parents who still don't know I am a brony, so, it's tough).

I know that feel, bro.