Story here.

Go forth and comment.

I liked it. I was a bit anxious going into it because the premise was a little tired, but it had me pretty entertained the whole way through.
There were only two real gripes I had about it.
1.) The whole "In no way was I worrying about looking like a foal in front of my lifetime idols, particularly since I already screwed up in auditions. I definitely wasn’t worrying about whether or not my advancement was just out of pity, or from the fact that I saved the Wonderbolts’ lives. Not at all." type stuff got a bit overdone. It gave me a cheeky grin reading it for a while, but I felt at some point the narration should have dropped it, before Dash's false bravado began to get worn.
2.) The way the ending played out, with Dash telling her friends she was accepted because she couldn't bear to tell them she failed, was touching and a little heartbreaking. And the way that scene played out was great, except after the reader finds out she failed it ends a little too quickly. It doesn't quite go the full length in drawing out the emotions of the moment. Also the last couple paragraphs shatter the atmosphere with a bit of completely out of place humour. It changes the atmosphere from Dash being anxious and worrying, to 'eh, well I'll do it next year.'

Okay, reading first person Rainbow Dash was... interesting alright. Certainly well-done and entertaining to read. Did get a little overdone towards the end, but I think it does show Dash's inner insecurity well.

I did think the final scene-break was a little abrupt, with no hints of her implied failure beforehand. Perhaps it was intended, but it left me with a little "wut?" moment at the end.

The final scene also felt like it was lacking in resolution. Although I liked the way you didn't outright tell us that Dash lied to her friends about the result of the try-out, we didn't really get to see the result of that lie. Perhaps you never intended to, but the scene felt like it lacked any sort of punch as a result.

509027
Um.

I had humor there? Where? I'm not seeing it. This might be like when Tactical Rainboom thought my reference to Ben Drowned was supposed to be a joke (a stance that completely baffles me).

509696
All the best short stories I've ever read have left resolution open-ended. I feel laying out an outline for how the story ends rather than a set path with its final moments lets the reader stop and think, pondering the full weight of the characters' actions. Much of writing is suggesting just enough that the reader can fill in the rest themselves (like with description), and I apply that same philosophy to writing endings.

510595
Morbid humour. With the Cake.
It may have not been intentional, but the image of someone being depressed while scarfing down cake had a slight humourous tone. Mostly because of the use of the word 'scarfing'.

>Morbid humour. With the Cake.
Made me think of this: http://youtu.be/JsTO57M3KgA