EA New Dawn

• MLP: FiM
• Sad
• Slice of Life

I thought you knew how much we loved you. So why did you leave?

• Luna
• Royal Guard

Zontan · 1.2k words  ·  90  4 · 1.8k views

Zontan’s A New Dawn is an incredibly concise and compact story, yet its execution is flawless and the emotions it appeals to are visceral and real: resulting in a piece that almost does a hit and run on your feelings. This piece, like much of what I end up reviewing here, is a speedwrite, yet not a single word or moment is wasted and every piece of it hits you right in the feels. 

The plot is actually a fairly unique one, something that I personally haven't seen much of. Following Luna’s banishment to the moon, Celestia disbands the night guard. The story follows two members of said guard, Dusk Flare and Flash Sentry Shadow. The dynamic between these two is fascinating, but we’ll get to that in a second.

Ultimately, the story explores the immediate aftermath of Luna’s banishment and how it affects these two characters in particular. The framing and focus works again to this story’s favor: even if we only interact with two minor characters, their actions and voicing is implicit of much more complex and global feelings and emotions, resulting in a story that not only is relevant for its context, but applicable to many of us as well. 

So to reiterate: the plot is tight, compact, and concise. Yet it’s surprisingly versatile as well, and we can all probably plug it into our own lives at some point if we haven’t already. So bravo! 

The story features two OC’s as members of Luna’s soon-to-be-defunct Night Guards. Both have very different motivations for being there and both contrast and reflect each other incredibly well. 

First we have Dusky Flare, who is clearly the more amicable of the two. Dusky in my mind reflects the type of people who are just in jobs to get by. Which is acceptable! Not everyone can get their dream job out the gate or even at all, so Dusky isn’t too shaken up that the Night Guard is breaking up. 

But in contrast, we have Flash Shadow. Flash’s entire life has been building up to serving Luna in the Night Guard: all of his ambitions and dreams involve it. But now the goddess he loves and swore his duty to is gone. 

The character dynamic here is utterly superb: Dusky isn’t ignorant to what all of this means to Flash, and does his best to be there for him, even offering him support as Flash tries to figure out what he’s meant to do now.

And Flash’s section is visceral as well. We really see that Flash loves Luna, and above all he can’t understand why she would leave. The entire piece cements itself around this idea: that there were dozens of others like Flash who loved Luna, and who are now devastated by her departure. 

Flash probably isn’t alone in this regard either. I’m sure there are hundreds of people out there who reached their dream position only to have it taken away, by factors often out of their control. The best we can do is to be their Dusky’s, and give support and help to those who need it. 

In short, the character work is fantastically crafted. Both OC’s have life and depth to them, and the emotions they show here add to the meandering, lost feeling that is present for the entire story. It really makes me want to read more about Luna’s banishment but from the perspective of characters like these. If I had to nitpick, I suppose some physical descriptions would have been nice, but the work in every other aspect is so strong I can overlook this. 

The prose was solid and flowed incredibly well. I noticed no grammar mistakes or things to comment on. Well done! 

All in all, this was an excellent story that proves short tales can pack a punch. The plotline, while simple, is nonetheless refined, and the characters are engaging and draw empathy from the reader even while being OC’s. Stories like these are honestly hard to come by and this one did not disappoint. 

If you like stories with OC’s and stories set in the time of Luna’s banishment, I’d recommend this fic! 

Very strong showing. Your writing is always solid and this one’s no exception, I really enjoyed reading this piece!