"Didn't you finish this already?"

"Why continue this review? You already ended it a long time ago."

wELL APPARENTLY GODJORGECUBANSON AND HIS MINIONS DECIDED TO SPAWN IN A NEW ARC and another one afterwards. (To be fair, Godson did hint towards Arc 3, so it was going to happen anyways)

"So why bother even doing this when you're probably farther behind everyone else who read?"

i blame procrastination for causing me to be as slow as internet explorer

also i was obligated to do this

ANYWAYS SO, SINCE THE STORY HAS NOT YET ENDED, THIS REVIEW HAS NOT YET ENDED EITHER.

I HEREBY DECLARE A REVIEW REVIVAL!

Note: The millions of sins will not be revoked because f*ck it.

Second Note: This might be a once every week/2 weeks thing

Also, I'm doing a new thing with the sins. What is it? You'll see in a second.

The Tantabus then proceeded to block out the sun in blackness as it did when it first had rein over her nightmares. As black rays shot down through the broken window between the two thrones Luna floated up into the air. Transforming into Nightmare Moon once again. She floated down while cackling evilly.

Well, Arc 3 just went from 0 to 100 real fast.

(SINS ARE NOW IMAGES :d)

“So, Shadow… Marriage.”

Skip!

“Exactly, but I don’t know why she wanted us to co—” Shadow was immediately interrupted as he fell over, bumping into a tall, white stallion wearing his purple-gold captain’s armor.

The worst part about this was the fact that Shadow didn't say "Sorry" or "My bad" after bumping into Shining Armor.

“I have not.” Shining shook his head. “I’ve been dealing with more important things.” He sighed. “I assume you’re still as retarded as ever?”

"MLP:FIM Behind The Scenes - PG 13"

“Believe me, if I wanted to steal Philomena’s feathers again, I’d ask Celestia first.”

“Okay, fine, I did.” Jorge rolled his eyes. “I’m bored. What do you expect from me?”

“As long as you don’t decide to play ‘The Price is Rice’, again.” Shining shrugged. “I suppose it’s fine.”

That moment when you realize the game has yet to make rice as a prize and is already being abandoned.

Jorge slowly got up, ignoring the small pain he felt from being thrown at the floor. He grabbed his glasses, noticing part of the lens was cracked, and the handle was missing.

“Aw man.” He groaned. “This is the… uh… twentieth time they’ve broke, now?”

I don't recall ever reading about the other 19 times.

“I’m just gonna… go see where Celestia is…”

“Why?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.

“I wanna see if she’ll feed me another banana.”

Oh she'll feed you a banana. A lot more than you think.

“...Why would she do that?” Shadow curiously asked, his head tilting as he tried to understand.

“Don’t ask.” Jorge and Twilight both deadpanned at the Canadian, leaving him even more confused.

Only a Jorge would forget to tell a Canadian about his banana shenanigans.

Shining sighed, then walked up to his little sister. “So… When am I gonna meet this fiancé of yours, Twily?”

Shadow immediately widened his eyes, and slowly began walking away backwards in a sad attempt to leave the area.

The shame shuffle.

“I did. But... it’s Ish. He’s going to show up anyways.” Jorge replied calmly.

“Well did you make preparations for when he does?”

“Why do you think I have this?” Jorge spoke as he lifted up a baseball bat, “The bush is also ready to receive a very unconscious Ish.”

Bush exploitation and Ish abuse.

“I heard you sh*ts mention me,” Ish spoke from behind Jorge, scaring both him and his Canadian friend. “Do you need me to meme something?”

“QUICK! DO IT NOW!”

“Wha—” Before Ish could even say another word, Jorge firmly grasped the baseball bat, swinging it against the asian’s head. He immediately fell to the floor, unconscious once more.

^That's Ish btw

“You let this idiot be your best man?” Shining raised an eyebrow towards Shadow. “...Seriously?”

the cuban was the last option

“Yeah. Well. He’s a lot better than the idiot currently unconscious in the bushes outside.” Shadow replied.

Shining blinked. “What?”

Not only do Canadians slip on ice frequently, they slip up on their words as well.
(ayy)

Jorge shrugged. “So, Shadow. Twilight.”

“...What about her?”

“How often have you banged her?”

How to change topics and make things slightly worse like a Jorge.

Jorge immediately shrugged. “Fine. At least I didn’t make love within the first five days in my relationship.”

“What?” Shining went wide-eyed, nearly instantly shifting his view at the also shocked stallion next to him.

“Um...I plead section 13 of the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms.”

rip Shadow

Shining’s attitude slowly shifted from a mix of confusion and anger to a more calmer attitude. “Heh…” He chuckled, looking over to the Canadian next to him. “Now I see why he’s your best man.”

“You do?” Shadow blinked. “Cause… I don’t.”

Well one of these two are missing their glasses. But which one?

“Hiya, Goddy!”

“No, wait… You changed your name…” She then shook her head rapidly for a good second, then returned back to normal. “Hiya, Jorgie!”

“That’s right!” Pinkie stated. “You’re Shadie’s best-man!”

“Another!” Dash spoke loudly, slamming her cup down on the table.

“Lady, that’s your fifth cup already, don’t you think you’ve had enough?” The bartender raised an eyebrow.

“No!” Dash slammed a hoof against the table. “Not until I freakin’ pass out!”

That is an extremely bad place to draw the line.

“I’ve already had enough alcohol for the night.” Jorge chuckled. “It’s fine, just leave it there.”

Romance for them, wasted drinks for the bartender.

[Insert several quotes with romance and wing rings here]

“Well, she’ll probably have brought at least one, just because it’s me get—” Shadow started to say but was cut off as he tripped over air, bumping into a tall, pink alicorn on his way down.

It takes skill to trip over air.

Soon enough, he found one. “So, uh. Cadance… I, uh, I’m curious. Is that offer for that gift you mentioned a long time ago still available?”

“Huh?” Cadance blinked, then quickly shook her head. “Oh. Yeah. Um… Are you sure?”

“As sure as I’ll ever be, I guess…” Jorge scratched the back of his head. “I still need to go grab something else later today…”

As he was finishing his sentence, he had already noticed Cadance’s horn glowing, he raised an eyebrow, looking around to see if anything was levitating closer to them, or if she was creating an object out of thin air. But, to both Jorge and Shadow’s surprise, nothing happened.

“There ya go.” Cadance winked. “Have fun!”

“Cadance!” Shining shouted. “We forgot to pick up that gif—” He immediately cut himself off once he ran into their room, finding the soon-to-be groom in that same room. “Uh… That thing, from that place, from that place with the thing.”

How not to pretend that you forgot to get your gift.

“Define a ‘few’”.

“A good seven hundred bits. Maybe more.”

“Welp.” Jorge deadpanned, immediately looking over to his best friend, patting him on the back. “Heyyyy—”

“I’m f*cking broke, Jorge.”

I spy with my little eye an error.

As Shadow continued his self-lead tour around the castle, he ended up walking into Celestia’s room, as he walked, in he noticed her phoenix. Jorge followed him in, and hit a banana, held by a thin string, at just the right height for it to hit his face.

o sh*t jorge totally just got BANANA'd

“So… Celestia.” Shadow pestered.

“Hm?”

“Can I have a sword?”

“Hmmm...” Celestia placed a hoof on her chin. “Lemme think abou—No.”

“But whyyy?”

“No.”

“Bu—”

“No.”

What could possibly go wrong? I say give the soon-to-be prince a sword!

But, then, she went wide-eyed upon seeing something significant. Something that had reminded her of her recent nightmares.

His cutie mark.

“‘TIA! Stand back! He is a follower of Nightmare Moon!” Luna shouted,

Shadow's [true] love accused him of being evil. Rough.

Shadow broke the hug, looking up at Celestia with a curious look.

“So… What’s with the bananas?”

[Insert detailed and well-done description of wedding scene here]

Celestia blinked, then quickly shook her head as she attempted to focus on the main event. “Well. Unless anypony has any objec—”

“I OBJECT!”

Who the f*ck invited Phoenix Wright to the party?

In an instant, Ish found himself being pushed by his cuban friend, who, on the way out, Jorge reached out next to the door, and grabbed a conveniently placed baseball bat, ready for whacking unsuspecting Ishtabas.

And then, the doors closed.

”So, Jorge. What is it you need to show me?”

”...Jorge? What are you doing…?”

”WAIT JORGE NO!”

”JORGE NO!”

*THUMP!*

More Ish abuse.

Shadow smiled, quickly looking over to his new brother-in-law. “So… Shining… about that sw—”

“No.” Celestia interrupted, walking past the two of them as she casually went to do something else.

Shadow and the tales of the unobtainable sword.

Shadow simply blinked, wondering what Celestia had in store for that poor, defenceless banana.

The c in defenceless is triggering me. I want to say it's wrong but it's apparently correct. Anyways three sins for the banana.

“What am I supposed to do with this?” Dash raised an eyebrow, glaring at the banana in his hand.

“I dunno, you could either eat it, throw it away… beat up a princess with it…”

“What?”

“What?” Jorge blinked.

I'd pay good money to see someone beat up a princess with a banana. Heck, did you know there was a guy who tried to rob a store with a banana? okayofftopiciknow

He decided to look as his marefriend once more, wondering what she was planning on doing with that banana, but, the minute he looked at her, she jumped up, and stuffed the banana into his mouth.

jorge got banana'd TWICE

But at that very moment, him breaking the kiss so soon had meant nearly nothing.

Because now, she had half a banana in her mouth.

Disgusting payback. I like.

Jorge simply nodded, and walked off to a nearby exit, where Rarity stood, waiting for him.

“Right. So… That ring you wanted me to get?” She raised an eyebrow. “It’s done, darling.”

Hey look, it's one of the few times Rarity appears in the story.

“If he does anything stupid he’s all yours, Shining.”

“Deal.” Shining smirked evilly, quickly earning a nudge from his wife.

“Oh yeah, make sure his meals consist of bananas though, they’re his favourite if you couldn’t tell.” Shadow added.

“Noted.”

In an instant, Shining went wide-eyed as he heard a whisper, and watched as a banana was slowly being placed on the table.

“The Price is Rice.”

Sweet f*ckery this is a lot of bananas.

Not a minute later, the doors opened again, revealing a dark red pegasus stallion, his mane was laid out on the top of his head, with five black-tipped spikes poking out, then spread out to the back of his head and neck, with black-tipped large spikes poking out as well. His tail was a lot smoother and shorter, as it followed a red and black stripe pattern, with a couple of small spikes, poking out from the edges. His eyes were a very light blue, and, despite Shadow’s best efforts, he couldn’t seem to make out the cutie mark all too well.

Jorge should've been discovered immediately if the ponies were actually paying attention. Then again, us readers already know it was Jorge... But still, isn't it already a dead giveaway that this mystery pony is Jorge considering that he came back in after Twilight (who went back to her seat with a "spring" in her step)? Maybe I'm overthinking.

Twilight shook her head. “Actually, he’s a good friend of mine.”

If that last one didn't give it away, surely one of the ponies who had partially watched them would know that's Jorge, right? RIGHT?
the answer was no.

Instantly, Shadow was able to make out the mark, which was a box with multiple objects, the handle of a sword, a quill, and a lenny face.

Partial swordsmaster, writer and slick with the ladies.

“You still have yet to answer my question, Dash…”

Dash looked down to the ring, then back at him again. She closed her eyes, trying to fight back the tears building up, despite her best efforts, her tears were too strong for her to hold back, and they swiftly begun their path down from her eyes, and falling off her face.

”...Yes…”

Jorge raised an eyebrow, still holding on to his loving smile. “Hm? What’d you say?”

”Yes…”

“I still can’t hear you…”

“Yes! Yes, Jorge, Yes!” Dash immediately went in, wrapping her hooves around her now fiancé.

F*CKING FINALLY

“Three weeks.” Twilight bluntly stated.

Jorge raised an eyebrow, placing a thinking hoof on his chin. “But… Three weeks ago was…” His eyes immediately shot wide-open.

“...The ‘dat ass’ incident…” Shadow finished Jorge’s thought process, his own eyes widening as well.

And I quote from a previous chapter:

“I mean, dat ash of yours is pretty great Dash, not that I would know or anything...But Twi’s is better…” Shadow casually spoke. Trying as hard as possible not to look at his enraged marefriend.

Jorge turned his head back. “FLY, SHADOW, FLY LIKE THE WIND!”

TSC: 3,348 (Writing errors will skyrocket sin counts)
Sentence: Bananas, Weddings, and an abused Ishtaba.

I was gonna make a "Godson's seal of approval". But inkscape crashed on me and made me lose all my progress on it.

...And my patience.

5670490 rest in pepperoni godsen's seal