We all know I always start with the description.

Taking place half a month after "How I Kissed My Waifu", follow Godson as he attempts to adjust to living in Equestria. Meeting new friends along the way, or just making himself look like an idiot, maybe both.

This looks familiar... 1
Also, inb4 no Lyra.

If only his friends back home knew what he's gotten himself into.

Then again, they probably wouldn't have even cared, anyway...

*cough* They will know soon enough *cough* 2

Okay that's enough of that. Let's move on to the chapter.

It was a bright and sunny day in Ponyville.

As always. 3

The wind howled through the near perfect trees, never blowing a single leaf off.

Can I borrow one of those for next autumn? Thanks. 4

“Shut up, Linda!” A loud voice shouted, followed by the shrill sounds of a barking dog.

You just HAD to bring your dog into this. Didn't you? 5

“It’s been a whole friggin week since I brought you to this world, and you still won’t stop barking at the ponies!”

Linda is in a world full of colorful ponies. You'd bark at random ponies as well if you were a dog. 6

“Seriously…” Godson looked out his window, then back to his dog. “What am I gonna do with you…?”

I heard there's this pony who claims to talk to animals. Who was it again? 7

Linda tilted her head in confusion, still wagging her tail as she waited for her owner to give her attention.

Dogs these days amirite? 8

“And now I gotta go to work…” He thought aloud

Have fun with that. 9

As he got closer to the door leading to the outside world, he grabbed his phone from a desk near the exit, despite not receiving calls or having internet, he still never knew when he’d need to take a picture.

Because why not? 10

As he exited his own house, locking the door behind him. He thought about the past few weeks ever since that day.

Dat period tho. 11

One Week Ago...

Oh gawd a flashback. 12

Twilight hummed softly as she was organizing her books, specifically, in alphabetical order.

Wouldn't it be more efficient to sort it by genre, then put them in alphabetical order? 13

She picked the perfect time to do this, too. Pinkie was still working over at Sugarcube Corner, Applejack had some more apples to buck, Fluttershy was nursing a baby bird back to health, Rainbow Dash was working on this week’s weather schedule, and Rarity simply had several orders to fill.

Basically, all her friends were too busy to interrupt her.

Except for...

But, suddenly, the door slammed wide open with a loud thump, catching the alicorn off guard. She yelped in fear, completely cancelling out her spell, all the levitated books now fell on the floor, some even landing on her, while the others remained on the bookshelf.

“TWILIIIIIIIIGHT!” A male voice shouted. “I JUST HAD THE GREATEST IDEA!”

Dis mofo 14

“Linda.”

“...What?” Twilight tilted her head.

“My dog.” Godson blinked. “Have I never mentioned her before?”

Obviously not. 15

“Well, remember that spell you used to bring me here?” Godson queried, pausing for a moment as he received a nod from Twilight. “Right, well, my dog kinda… noticed it, I guess.”

“Wait a sec.” Twilight interrupted. “That was your dog?”

Twilight is savage AF. 16

“Yeah.” Godson nodded, raising his eyebrow softly. “What did you think she was?”

“Uh… Nothing.” Twilight’s muzzle scrunched as she tried to dodge the question.

Just say it. You can't dodge it.

“Uh…” She uttered. “A big rat, or something…”

Rats don't f*cking bark! 17

Godson paused for a moment, taking in Twilight’s words. He took a deep breath, and sighed deeply. “I kinda expected as such, her being a chihuahua and all.” Before Twilight could ask, he quickly interrupted her. “A breed of dog. Please tell me you have different breeds of dogs…”

Twilight simply nodded in response

How the f*ck do you not know what a chihuahua is with this many books? 18

“Uh, alright.” Twilight nodded at the human’s odd request. “Yeah, sure, I could do it.”

“Cool!” Godson cheered. “So uh… when are you gonna do it?”

“Seriously?” Twilight deadpanned, looking at all the books scattered on the floor around her, then back at Godson.

I guess that's going to be no! 19

“Right, so.” Twilight began, “I can’t guarantee I can get the spell working again, it took me quite a few tries just to get you here, Godson.”

“So what you’re saying is…”

“If I get this to work again…” Her horn illuminated in a purple glow. “You’re one lucky human.”

Too lucky if you ask me. 20

Soon, the room began to illuminate in a bright purple glow as Twilight tried to focus her magic on decently powerful spell. Every now and then she’s groan as she kept her magic stable, as one little mistake could cause quite a lot of damage, she wasn’t exactly sure to what, but she didn’t exactly want to find out.

I see three errors. For that, 3 sins. 23

“C’mon, Linda… find the portal already…” He muttered to himself.

Surely enough, the portal caught the attention of a certain white chihuahua, with two large brown spots on the sides of her head. One spot covered the area around her left eye, and covered her entire left ear, as well a little extra around the two areas, creating one big circle on her left side. Another spot, while smaller than the first one, covered the right side of her face, covering from behind her right ear to just a few centimeters next to her right eye.

Brace yourself. The "rat" comments are coming! 24

“Gah! The heck is that!?” Dash pointed at the small dog.

“My dog.” Godson stated flatly.

“That’s a dog?” Dash asked, shocked by the answer she was given. “That looks more like a rat!”

Dash is also savage AF. 25

“Whew…” Twilight panted. “That was… quite tiring…”

“Wait… That was it?” Dash went wide-eyed. “You had Twilight go through all this trouble… Just to get your dog back!?”

Yup, he don't care. 26

Dash looked at the dog held in his arms, scanning every part of her, she wasn’t exactly sure to think, but then the dog reached forward slightly to lick her nose.

“H-Hey!” Dash jerked her head back, placing a hoof on her now wet nose. She looked back at the dog, and smiled softly. “...T-That was kinda cute…”

They sure did bond quite fast.

“Alright.” Twilight interrupted. “Lemme see, too.” She rubbed her head, trying to clear away her massive headache, a side-effect from keeping the portal open for so long. She walked up to the dog, analysing the dog’s behaviour, which seemed normal. Her horn illuminated once more, literally scanning the dog for any anomalies from jumping through the portal. That, too, returned with normal results.

She reached a hoof to Linda’s head, trying to pet her, only for her to retaliate and bark, spooking the alicorn mare, her hoof speedily retracting back to her body.

But not Twilight apparently. 27

“Watch it, Linda.” Godson said, stifling a chortle. “She’s the reason why you’re here.”

“What kind of name is ‘Linda’ anyway?” Dash raised an eyebrow.

“It’s Spanish.” Godson rolled his eyes, knowing he’d get another question from Twilight, he looked at her with a deadpan expression. “Let me answer your upcoming question with another question: Does Equestria have different languages?”

Nope.

Twilight simply nodded.

Damn it. 28

“She’s usually nicer than this, I’m not exactly sure why she snapped at you like that…” Godson looked at the dog as well. “Or, more importantly, why she snapped at you, but not Rainbow Dash?” He looked at the pegasus mare.

Cuz Rainbows man. 29

Then, Godson thought of something. “Y’know, it surprises me that she’s suddenly okay with you two petting her, being ponies and all.”

“Why’s that?”

“I dunno… I mean, if I were a dog, I’d be even a little freaked out to be around two ponies that are giant compared to me.” Godson commented. “But Linda seems perfectly fine with it.”

Sure, she's fine now. But you let her go outside for one second...

Once they exited the library, Linda began to bark and yap loudly at the rest of the town. She even went as far as running off to chase somepony.

This happens. 30

“Thanks, Twilight. I owe you one.”

“Oh, no need.” Twilight shook her head. “Consider this as an… apology, for having you stuck here.”

And that is how you make sh*t depressing. 31

“Well, thanks anyways, Twilight.” He placed the dog down on the floor. “I really appreciate it.”

“No problem.” Twilight’s smile formed again. “I’m glad I was able to help you. Let’s… just agree on not using the portal again, alright?”

Oh I KNOW this is a promise that can't be kept. 32

“Goddy!”

37

“Huh?” Godson snapped out of his flashback, finding himself behind the register of Sugarcube Corner; his workplace. There was a large line of ponies waiting to take their order, some impatient, some angry over the human’s random daze, and others just not caring entirely.

Oh how irresponsible of you to have a flashback while at work. 38

“What’s all the hold up for?” Pinkie asked. “You’ve been standing there doing nothing for the past fifteen minutes!”

Fifteen minutes? That's an eternity! Well in my standards... 39

“I’m surprised everyone waited fifteen minutes just to take their order…”

“They didn’t…” Pinkie countered. “I’ve been doing your job for the past fifteen minutes!”

He's so lucky he didn't get fired after this. 40

Suddenly, sounds of a ringing bell came from behind. Godson recognized the sound, being the small bell attached to the door. It’s purpose was to ring a little whenever the door was opened.

I'm pretty sure we all know what a bell is. 41

“Heyooo!” Dash cheered. “Quiet hour, huh?”

“Just a bit.” Godson answered with a chuckle. “So what are you doin’ here, Dash?”

The hell kinda question is that?! 42

“Anyway.” Dash cleared her throat, grabbing a large box that Pinkie placed on top of the counter. “We’re doin’ this at your place, right?”

“I don’t exactly have any wings.” Godson looked to his back to verify, then back at Dash. “So yeah, we’re doin this at my place.”

“You could always have Twilight cast a cloudwalking spell on you.” Dash pointed out.

“Eh. Too much work.” Godson shook his head.

Still semi-lazy eh? 43

“See ya then!” She shouted, exiting the bakery.

“‘Kay!” Godson shouted back.

And then the door closed.

“...Did she just wink at me?”

Aaaand get the bleach. 44

Two Weeks Ago…

Oh gawd another one. 45

Also, since this review is taking longer than I expected we'll just slap in 5 sins, skip the flashback and give me 10 sins for being lazy. 50

Godson walked to the door of his house, noticing how quiet Linda was, compared to how she usually is when she hears him nearby. He shrugged it off, figuring she was sleeping, or something. He lifted the welcome mat, reaching for his key, only to find nothing where the key was supposed to be.

That's why you don't keep sh*t under a mat! 51

Knowing Dash would be here soon for their movie, he made a direct trip to his bedroom, changed out of his work uniform that Rarity made, specially tailored for him. He glanced at his closet, noticing a certain pink shirt that said “I <3 Ponyville!”

There is no way he is ever going to wear that. Unless, of course, he tries to take over Equestria again. 52

He looked at the bed where Linda was supposed to be, only to find nothing in her place.

It would've been funnier if there was a random cat. What? It's just my opinion. 53

“Why would anyone want to dognap her?”

So they can sell her on the black market for a bunch of bits. She's sorta like an exotic in Equestria dude. 54

He walked into the living room, finding the light was dimmed slightly, he narrowed his eyes, analysing the room for anything that might hurt him.

Instead, a certain cyan pegasus poked her head over the couch, upon recognizing the human, she flashed a sultry smile. “There you are!” She cheered. “It’s about time you showed up!”

Of course she's here early. 55

Godson sighed in relief. “How long have you been waiting there?”

“Long enough.” Dash grumbled. “You know, you really shouldn’t keep a mare waiting…”

Gawd, such an impatient pony aren't you? 56

“So, what movie are we watching, Dash?” Godson asked curiously.

“Well, they just released the movie remake of ‘Daring Do and the Quest for the Sapphire Stone’ on DVD. And since I haven’t seen it yet, I, uh, I figured we could watch that.” Dash smiled sheepishly.

Let's be realistic, she'd still watch it even if she already seen it. 57

“I’m fine with that.” Godson nodded. “I haven’t read any of the books, so why not?”

“You’re lucky this is the first in the series, then.” Dash smiled.

Ya know what, I'm tired of Godson's luck. 3 sins! 60

“Anyway, I’mma go grab the food, go start setting up the movie.”

“‘Kay.” They both got up from the couch, Godson went for the DVD player, grabbing the movie Dash left on top of it, and inserting the disk into it. Dash made a direct trip to the kitchen, where she left the food, conveniently placed in decently sized styrofoam boxes. She even went as far as labelling the boxes, in order to avoid mixing them up.

Unless the food in both boxes are the same which in that case that was pointless. 61

She looked at today’s date, and grabbed a pen left over on the table. She drew a large circle around it, and smiled. “Today’s gonna be perfect…”

Ten bucks she circled Hearts and Hooves day!

“Hearts and Hooves Day”.

CALLED IT! 62

Dash and Godson snuggled closely as the movie played. Godson left his arm wrapped around her, while Dash rested her head on his chest, and her forelegs wrapped around his waist. For him, this was just a casual movie date, completely oblivious to today being as special as it was for Dash

Do you even calender bro? 63

For her, it was so much more than just a casual movie date, despite only being together with him for two weeks, Dash reveled in the attention she was given in those two weeks. She knew he was oblivious to the fact today was Hearts and Hooves, but it didn’t matter for her, she was gonna take this chance to spend time with him even more.

Fun Fact: The POV changed! 64

Sure, they did sleep together once, but all they really did was just make out. Nothing much really happened, despite what she was hoping would happen today. She would’ve done something like this sooner, but she figured to wait just a little bit before she’d get called out for ‘being too fast’.

She'll get called out for being too fast once you see how this chapter ends. 65

"Hm…” Daring Do placed a thinking hoof on her chin. “There must be a pattern here… What do all these animals have in common…?”

Puzzles! My favorite! 66

She barely even payed attention to the movie being played in front of her, she would continuously switch from watching the movie, then turn her head to see Godson as he watched the movie. She couldn’t help but smile whenever she saw his bright and cheery face.

Watch the damn movie! You're missing out on some important puzzle-solving skills! 67

“Aha!” Daring Do exclaimed. “These animals are all predators! Except… Rats!” She nervously placed a hoof on the tile with a picture of a rat on it.

You missed it! 68
Also, this is the third time rats are mentioned. 69

Godson reached over for the remote, trying not to disturb Dash from her trance. He turned down the movie just a bit, allowing him to focus his attention to the cuddly mare holding him. He grabbed her by the base of her forelegs, and sat her on his lap, having her face him.

“W-What’re you doing?” Dash asked. “I thought we were watching the movie…”

“We were, until you kept looking up at me.” Godson chortled, watching as Dash’s face slowly tinted pink.

Impressive peripheral vision man. 70

“So then… what are you doing?” Dash cocked her head, this wasn’t part of her plan, and she wasn’t entirely sure she’d like how this would turn out.

“Just relax…” Godson muttered, then slowly moved his head forward, pressing his lips against hers.

Godson makes a move before Dash. -1 sin. 69

Caught off guard, Dash went wide-eyed, but quickly melted into the kiss as soon as she realized what was going on. She moaned into the kiss, enjoying the feeling of the human slowly beginning to caress her, and run his hands through her mane once more. She closed her eyes, wrapping her forelegs around his neck, bringing the two even closer. While his hands wandered lower, now reaching for her back, he began kneading and caressing the mare, coaxing her to relax herself.

You know, if he ends up making a fourth story, it's definitely going to be Mature. 70

“Could you… uh, turn off the TV?”

“Oh… uh… yeah...”

Dash released the human from her grasp, watching as he grabbed the nearby remote, switching the TV off. Soon, they found themselves in a more darker room, while the light was illuminating the room just a little bit, most of it was coming from the TV in front of them. The dim room suddenly seemed like a perfect mood-setter for the two of them.

“So much for eating dessert, huh?” Dash joked, remembering she was still sitting on his lap.

*cough* 71

“You sure about that?” Godson grinned slyly, grabbing a hold of the mare once more. “I thought I was getting pretty close to dessert…”

Stfu. 72

“G-Godson?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Go ahead.”

“You know today’s Heart’s and Hooves Day, right?”

He gawked in shock. “Really?” He asked. “I-I’m sorry, Dash, I didn’t reali—”

It's hilarious how oblivious he is. 73

“Will you be my special somepony… like… for real?”

Slow down Dash! 74

Eventually, he nodded. “Yeah, Dash. I’ll be your special somepony. Only if you’ll agree to be mine.”

“Deal.” Dash smiled, lunging herself forward for a quick peck. “Now that that’s over…” Her innocent smile faded to a more alluring grin. “Let’s see what we can do about that dessert…”

Bleach! 75

Total Sin Count: 75
Sentence: Cuddling (and lots of kissing)

Sorry if there are any errors in the review. This phone is a dick when it comes to auto-correct. Also, this sin review took me literally an entire day to complete. Stupid phones!

To be quite honest, I'm semi-glad you skipped the second flashback. That sh*t's the most awkward sh*t I've ever written.

5040314 Soon, the room began to illuminate in a bright purple glow as Twilight tried to focus her magic on decently powerful spell. Every now and then she’s groan as she kept her magic stable, as one little mistake could cause quite a lot of damage, she wasn’t exactly sure to what, but she didn’t exactly want to find out.
I see three errors. For that, 3 sins. 23

Glad to see that someone else can see his fantastic grammar.

Haha, instant 5 sins for anytime "Goddy" is said. Glad to see you're still doing that.