Drakness. I’m aware of how I spelt it; it’s a word we’ve most likely encountered at one point or another, and says leagues about the genre as a whole. “Let’s have Twilight meet an evil monster!” the faceless masses cry, and proceed to churn out pages of Twilight doing nothing but running, sobbing and screaming. Today’s feature has no nonsense of the sort, and is a nice taste of [Dark] done right—where the tone is soaked, permeated with it, not just Full Black OC McOCson.

Flashgen excels in building up, by first creating a perfectly normal base to work from. Seemingly unimportant side notes, an indicator of an unworried Twilight, aid in strengthening contrast; the book of combat spells, disregarded so cheerily initially, is turned to for solace later on, a reflection of how susceptible our minds are in the face of the unknown. And the author takes his time in preparing, because the payoff is worth it. Throughout the fic, Twilight’s voice is very well-controlled; the descent is slow but sure, and it is that creeping surety that gives birth to true horror. There is also a gimmick at play; I won’t spoil it for you, but when you do find it, think about what it means. Can you feel the weight of those implications?

Now, in terms of emotional response or shock, this elicited little more from me than a shiver. But in terms of pacing, sequence of events, characterization, and above all, entertainment value, A FLEet|ng L|ght |n thE DArknEsS has won my full respect.

If Happy Birthday to You was sad done right, then A FLEet|ng LIght |n thE DArknEsS is fear done right. Why? Because I don’t care about the specifics of the monsters in this story, at all. I’m not supposed to care; the monsters are intentionally an unknown. If you went to a haunted house this past Halloween and had random guys in rubber masks jump out at you, that wasn’t fear. You were, if I may quote Randy Marsh, startled. Most of us have grown beyond this. Now, on the other hoof, fear of the unknown? If you don’t know it, you can’t be prepared for it. Fear of helplessly watching your safety slowly erode? By definition, if you’re helpless, then you’re powerless to stop it. Fear of watching your friends suffer, not in the cheap-o Saw or Final Destination way, but emotionally? One of the reasons FIM resonates so well with all of us is because of how character-driven the series is. Flashgen captured that essence, and gave us a horror tale where the fear is largely derived from how the mane characters are reacting to their circumstances.

Also of note, the story makes an effective use of the oft-maligned journal format. Right at the onset of the story, it is revealed that somepony wrote this journal, and somepony else found it and analysed it. Because of this triple-layer of narration, the journal itself, moreso than the journal’s writer or reader, serves as an unreliable narrator, which adds a delicious amount of mystery and suspense into an already suspenseful story. Those of us who are not clever ponies (such as yours truly) may benefit a second readthrough to catch all the nuances contained within. Now come, unravel the mysteries of this journal.

((My points about “feeling startled versus feeling fear” notwithstanding, it is worth mentioning that I read this story late at night, and turned off the lights in this room shortly after finishing it. At that exact moment, the AC vent directly overhead decided to kick on, blowing cold air onto my neck. Flashgen, my dry-cleaning bill is in the mail.))

REMEMBER, KIDDIES, THE DARKNESS IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!

To quote Lovecraft: "The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown."

This fic has taken this concept and run, cackling, into the night with it. This is true horror—not the sort which jumps out of the sock drawer and goes “Blarg! You are now scared!”—but the sort which builds up slowly and terribly, filling its reader with an inexorable dread. The plot, to describe it without spoilers, is relatively straightforward (dark happenings overtaking Ponyville, innocent townspeople disappearing, etc.), but where it shines is in its presentation and compounding atmosphere. The descent into ever-deepening darkness is made all the more disturbing by how it affects our heroines; this is not a fic to read if you’re looking for a happy ending.

If you are, however, looking for one last horror fix after Halloween, look no further than this fic. You will be disconcerted, you will be unnerved, and you will enjoy it. And if you keep your eyes open, you’ll find the mystery is even more impenetrable than it appears at first glance. Really—even I’m still trying to figure it all out!

I looked outside, and the sky was dark. No sun, no clouds, not even any stars, or the moon. It was just black.

Fictional journal entries are—by their very nature—filled with telling. Oftentimes, showing then takes the form of “not telling” or: showing by omission, which can be a powerful tool if used correctly. If nothing else, A FLEt|ng LIght |n thE DArknEsS manages this quite well. It is a true horror story, and it manages to establish a “monster” that—while never truly revealed, merely hinted at, and even then, vaguely—plays on one of our most basic fears: darkness.

At its most basic level, A FLEt|ng LIght |n thE DArknEsS is about Twilight and her friends dealing with this fear, and being driven to madness because of it. Watching their slow descent into insanity, especially Fluttershy’s, is like being Alex from A Clockwork Orange. We are forced to watch the characters we know and love fall apart before our eyes. Initially, it’s fun. Seeing them deal with disappearing foals and mysterious sightings is entertaining, and it provides an intriguing mystery. Then the dynamic changes. Fun becomes horror, as we see Twilight begin to lose her mind, and watch as Fluttershy struggles with being separated from her animals. Like riding the Br’er Rabbit water-slide at Disneyland, the tension builds with each new journal entry. Higher and higher it rises until, at the very peak, we see what these ponies have become. Spike is left speechless, unable to let go of Twilight. Rarity shuts herself away, Fluttershy screams from her prison, and Pinkie patiently waits. Then... it ends, with one final, cryptic note from Twilight.

This is a fic that rewards you for paying attention to the narrative, and even makes subsequent readings well worth your time. It's likely that you'll miss some stuff the first time through, but it's so short and so good, you won't mind multiple readings.

I heartily recommend that anyone interested in real horror—and journals—give this a chance. At a little over eight-thousand words, it’s well worth the short time it will take to read. So go read it, seriously, Flashgen could use the views.

It is really good; thanks for bringing it-


-to light.

Well, I guess this is the part where I say "thanks for giving me the courage to submit this to EqD," cause it got in.

Also,

489397

I'm watching you...

ljtrlkwqnflknve I loved this fic qpifhnovicpvqpi

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Nice!
Well, I'm glad that we were able to feature this before it became disqualified by being on EqD.
Congratulations, man.