Had to · 9:21pm Mar 2nd, 2021
Ever since I was younger I built up a wall to hide behind always keeping everything to myself. My wall has stood for almost 7 years now and I feel like it is crumbling. I'm feeling things that I don't think I should. I have hidden behind that wall for so long I forgot what most things feel like. But I think the worst part about it is I don't remember feeling most of it. I remember how to laugh, how to smile [even tho I don't do it most of the time] I remember sadness, but I don't remember what it's like to be happy all the time. I have shut myself down and brought others up for so long I don't know what it's like to be brought up with them. Every little thing I do wrong I feel like I failed and it hurts me. [Hehe another thing to add to the list] .sigh. I'm sorry if I wasted your time with you reading this. I'll try to keep It to myself next time. I just had to get this out. Maybe me saying this will take a burden off of my chest. But I doubt it.
Well
I know how you feel. I really do.
Also, Devonus used his blog posts to help get things off his chest for a year or so, I think. I've used it before. It's a great tool.
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I may do the same...