200 Followers Celebration! Part 2. · 3:20pm Jan 15th, 2021
Thanks again for 200 Followers!
Chapter: Unwanted guest.
BIZARRO POV
…
But something was… wrong. That’s the only way I could describe it, it was like a fog of dread filled the air as I got out of bed.
…
I smiled as I lifted the pancake to my lips to savor the delicious food before it suddenly turned into glitter and crumbled away. Everypony stared at me wide eyed as I looked at my breakfast, the rest of the food around me turning into wind up toys that were walking away from me. We all backed away from the table as more food changed into random objects. The apples that sat in the bowl turned into balloons and floated into the air, the bananas turned into miniature race cars and drove off of the table, and the silverware turned into snakes that slithered off of the plates.
“What’s going on?!” Twilight yelled in alarm as the chaos of our breakfast spread like wildfire, causing the tablecloth to turn into pudding and the chairs to sprout wings.
“Sister, this must be Discord!” Princess Luna shouted out as an somewhat familiar laughter filled the air. I knew this voice, I had heard it on tv and in movies back on Earth. It was one of the few actors I actually recognized because of their iconic voice, their oh so debatably annoying voice.
“Heeellllooo whate’va the heck this place’s called!” The voice said cheerfully before a flash of light enveloped the table.
We shielded our eyes as the flash burned out, revealing a three-foot-tall humanoid creature with a large head, needy eyes, and a purple suit with a matching bowler hat stood proudly on a stack of pancakes on the table.
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“Bizzarro, do you know him?” Twilight asked as she looked up at the fifth dimensional imp.
“GASP! Biz-Boy, did’ja really not tell them about me? Your besets pal, yer amigo, the peanut butter to yer jam?” He asked while I continued to glare at him.
“You am not Bizarro friend. You am meanie.”
…
"Allow me to introduce myself. I am Mister Mxyzptlk of Earth 28.
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"Me and big blue have a love hate relationship. I just love hating him. HA!" He joked as he summoned a drum set and player a comic rimshot.
"Stop talking. Voice am annoying."
…
"Well, I was going through the multiverse looking for a good match to go against Supe's. Imagine my surprise when I found a multiverse of a different dimension next to mine that had a Bizarro in it. So, a hop, skip, and a jump through a wormhole later, I came here to see if there really was a Bizarro here." Dear god make him stop talking…
"So, what da ya say big guy. I need a good flunki-I-I mean, ‘partner’ to help me annihilate Superman!"
"No.” I told him firmly.
"No? Oh right, I need ya ta ‘hug him’ if ya catch my drift?”
“Me know. Me say no.”
“… No? Bizzy, baby, if this is about some deal another me made wit'cha then I'm sorry about that. I'm a good guy. Besides, don't you want to take Superman down? You'll be a hero to everyone in Metropolis.”
"Answer am no. Buzz off."
"Wha... wait, wait, wait. Hold up! The heck's wrong with you Bizarro? You hate Superman!"
"Me hate you more." I told him as I tried to walk past him before he appeared in front of me yet again.
"Come on big guy, you know you don't mean that. Everybody loves me! And they'll love you when you replace big blue." He told me as a trophy and two supermodels appeared next to me. "Think of the fame, the glory, the sweet revenge!" He shouted in joy as confetti appeared out of nowhere.
"Answer am still no. Go before me make you say Shazam." I told him. The fifth dimensional imp gave me a befuddled look, as did everypony else.
"What?" He asked.
"You name. Me make you say name backwards so you am go away." I explained to him.
"Wait, what does that have to do with Captain Marvel?" He asked.
"Because you am need say Shazam to go away." I told him as I crossed my arms and tried to look more intimidating.
"What? No. You gotta make me say my name backwards."
"Right. Me need you say Shazam."
"No! I don't need to say Shazam you idiot! I'd need ta say kltpzyxm you dolt!.. … oh fooey..." He said before he popped out of existence. I'll admit, I had a mischievous grin on my face after I tricked him.
"Is... Is that it?" Twilight asked.
"Yup. We am no worry about him for 90—“
*POP*
"Guess who's back!" An obnoxious voice rehotorically asked. I begrudgingly turned around and was met with a glare from a certain fifth dimensional prick.
"So. You think you're clever, don't cha?" Mister Myx asked rhetorically.
"Why am you back?"
"Well, if you must know I didn't set the rules yet. So your little trick only made me go back for 90 days in my dimension, not yours. Ha! Not so smart now are ya?"
"So, wait," Rainbow Dash interjected. "If you say you're name backwards, you go away? What kind of lame weakness is that? It's like being weak to a rock." I'll admit, I cringed a little at her remark about the rock seeing as how that was one of my two weaknesses.
"Right on the nose, Skittles." Mister Myx told her as he popped a bag of skittles into existence and started eating them.
…
"Huh... Ya know, this world feels... off. Like it's energy is..." Mister Myx said before he trailed off and looked towards Canterlot.
"Oh! Oh! Another 5th Dimensional resident, lucky me! Even if Bizarro won't help, I'm sure Superman couldn't handle two of me!" He said gleefully.
"5th dimensional..." Twilight muttered before her eyes popped wide open. "Discord?!" She screamed.
"Oh, is that his name? Well, I'm gonna make friends with Discord while you all just pal around over here. M'kay? M'kay." He said before he popped out of existence instantly.
…
"You Fathercuddler!" She screamed.
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“Oh pah-lease. You think you're anything compared to me Mister Shamalamadingdong?"
"It's Myxy!"
"Mix what?"
"Mxyzptlk!”
"Really? And here I thought it was..." Discord trailed off as he pulled a tape player out of his Mister Myxy's threat and hit rewind. Mister Myx’s own voice repeated his name in reverse two consecutive times.
…
“It’s simple really, I took your magic away. No more dimensional hopping for you, my little pest.” Discord said as he patted Mister Myx on the head like a foal.
…
LUNA POV
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“What the Heck’s a Displaced?”
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“Ha! Ya think ya know Bizarro but’cha don’t! No matter what Earth, he’s always the laky, the idiot, the monster.”
…
“Aw, don’tcha wanna know how to… ya know, ‘take care’ of him when he finally snaps?”
…
“Please, the multiverse where I’m from is full of Bizarros. Heck, a version of me got him ta kill an entire planet and then slaughter dozens of people on another one. How long before someone says just the right words ta make Bizarro putty in their hands?” He rhetorically asked with a devious smile plastered on his face.
“I will not listen to your words, Trickster. I have seen Bizarro’s past life and I know he means our Ponies no harm. There is no way he would have done something as apprehensible as destroying a planet.” I argued.
“Really, and what proof do ya have?”
“The love he felt for his sister.” I responded. A long silence befell us as he digested my words before he spontaneously bursted out into a guffaw of roaring laughter.
“BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! HAHAHAAHA!”
“Pray tell, what is so amusing?”
“B-Bizarro doesn’t have a sister! I mean, Power Girl could be considered his cousin, but no sister; not in this Dimension or any other, Lady. I dunno what you saw but I can tell ya that he never. Had. A. Sister.” He told me confidently. I gritted my teeth in anger as he continued to prattle on.
“Can’t believe Bizarro of all people tricked you, that he tricked anybody. That moron couldn’t convince a scientist that the sky was blue if he tried. Though it’s not your fault ya got played like a fiddle, you’re probably not used to liars, or your just really stupid. But, considerin’ that your using big girl words and not ‘me am dumb-dumb’ like Bizarro, I’ll give ya the benefit of the doubt. I’ll also give ya a few more benefits, help me help you.” He said as he held out his freakishly small hands to me.
“And yet, he seemed to deceive you easily.” I said to him. My condescending remark caused his smile to falter as his right eye twitched.
“I had a bad day, sue me. But, yer gonna have a bad life if ya don’t take my offer.”
....
Chapter ?…
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“She’s a Changeling! She lied to us!” Twilight angrily said.
…
“If you can’t accept me for who I am then I don’t think we can be friends.”
…
“I couldn’t be honest with you about who I am because we live in a world where self-Identifying as a Changeling is a threat to one’s life. When I came here I was told Equestria was the land of Equality, Friendship, and Happiness, but I didn’t get any of that until I changed who I was.”
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“Hello, Bizarro. My name is Mrs. Rich, you may call me Mrs. Rich.”
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“Well, I was out of town for a bit relaxing in Manehatten, so I missed the little assembly this town had. So, imagine my surprise when I found out you were a freak!” She said happily which caused me to scowl at her.
…
“Listen, you do as I say and nopony in Canterlot will hear your dirty little secret.~”
“But Princess—“
“Yes, yes. I’m well aware of that little order. But what do I care? You’re my meal ticket out of this Hick-town, Beast.”
“Bizarro.”
“I know what I said.” She said with a snooty tone. “So, be a good colt and do what I say, and nopony has to know.”
“Go on, tell. Me am dare you.”
…
Mr. Rich? I thought to myself as I remembered where I saw him before. Wasn’t he the villain of the third Equestrian Girls movie? What’s he doing in Ponyville?
…
“Um… Thank you?” I said as a question. The Filthy Rich I knew from the movies was a downright bad guy, so for a bad guy to openly congratulate me was a little unnerving.
“I heard about your plan for Big Macintosh to run for mayor, and I’ve come to show my support for your project.” He explained.
…
“We… We lose?” I asked in disbelief as Mayor Mare took her place at the podium.
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“You did great work, Bizarro. Even if Big Mac lost, this is still a big step forward for stallions everywhere.”
…
“Well, if at first you don’t succeed, try try again. And you know what, I think it’ll be easier to win next time with stallions getting their vote too.” Twilight reassured me.
Chapter ?…
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“It am not about being scared, it am about being happy.” I told her, causing her to scoff at my remark.
“Please, what joy is there to derive from this night?” She asked as she looked away from the crowds.
“There am lots. There am candy, and pranks, and bestest of all am costumes!” I said excitedly. “They work hard to look fun. See over there, there am pony dressed as pirate.” I said as I pointed at a young colt who incorporated his crutches into his pirate costume.
“So?” Princess Luna asked me.
“So, he am work hard on costume to have fun. He go around as thing he not to play and laugh. Over there am filly dressed up as firefighter, awww, and doggy am dressed up like fire wagon.” I said as I noticed Applebloom dressed her dog up in a little red cardboard box with a garden hose tapped onto it.
“… I’ll admit, that is somewhat cute…” Princess Luna said slowly.
“Yeah! And look, there am astronaut, robot, knight, and… and…” The smile on my face slowly melted away as I looked at a colt with complete disbelief. Tears welled in my eyes as I looked at his blue costume and the red pillow-sack that was used as his makeshift cape. He had on two large yellow rainbows that were painted red, a pair of solid red boxers that were on the outside of his costume, and a backwards S on the chest of his costume that was drawn on with a red marker.
I moved my hand to my mouth as my breath got caught in my throat, my heart sank to my stomach as I kept looking at the young pegasus colt who was flying with a group of fillies that were dressed up like the Elements of Harmony, each one wearing a paper-mache version of the elements. I swallowed thickly as the tears continued to build up in my eyes
…
“I… I think I understand somewhat. This night is about being something you want to be, what you hope to be and sharing that with your friends.
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“Thank you, Bizarro. This night has been… Enlightening.” Princess Luna said as she walked away.
…
Chapter ?: In Honesty... And Loyalty.
(I wrote a long clop scene that was about a chapter long, and I’m not going to post it here. If you really want to see it then I could PM it, but I’m not putting it here since I’m kind of ashamed of writing it.)
BIZARRO POV
3, 2, 1.... annnnnd, boom. The infamous migraine. First sign of a hangover, a headache that made me crave death.
Oh hello pain, nice to feel you again.
I wasn't one to typically get drunk on a Monday night, let alone any night. I always hated the bitter taste of alcohol, but the Cider Applejack was serving tasted great. I'm wasn’t sure if Apple Cider was supposed to taste like apple juice and I quite frankly didn't care.
So, after having alcohol that actually tasted good for once, I decided to say "Fuck it" and drank as much as I could. Which was a pathetic amount if I'm being honest with myself.
Heh. Guess that means Superman can drink everyone under the table. I jokingly thought to myself as I started to lift myself up.
But, as soon as I got up I heard a woman's voice let out a groan. Oh god did I pick someone up while I was drunk? Shit! Pleasepleaseplease tell me they weren't drunk!
Looking over to my side quickly I saw the sleeping body of Applejack lying right next to me. As my eyes traveled down from her face to her body, my worst fears were realized, I had slept with Applejack. But that wasn't as nearly as shocking as the soft snoring on my left side.
Slowly turning my head, I saw Rainbow Dash nuzzling my left arm as she let out a few more quiet snores. While both of the Mares in the bed were peacefully sleeping, I was having a miniature panic attack in my mind.
FFFUUUCK!
Many emotions raced through me. Regret, nervousness, fear, anxiety, and a just a small hint of pride which was instantly buried under more fear.
Fuck!
And then there was even more fear, doubt, and panic laced under that idiotic sense of pride as I looked at my two friends.
…
I didn’t know what to do, I had never had sex with my fiends before, I never even had sex period!
Fuck! I had sex with two of my friends, and by extension one of my other friends’ sister! Sleeping with your friends, definitely awkward, sleeping with your friend’s sister on the other hand is an entirely different can of worms.
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“Bizarro… Me never do that…. before.” I admitted causing Rainbow Dash to nearly choke on her coffee.
“What? Biz, you’re a virgin?”
“I believe the term is ‘was’, Darling.” Rarity added on.
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“Nopony is going to get pregnant Bizarro, after all the heat season isn’t for a few more weeks.”
…
I still had no idea what was going on. Were we friends, friends with benefits, was there anything more to it than sex? Would it happen again and did I want it to happen?
“Um… So, we am still friends, right?” I asked hesitantly as everything seemed to freeze in place for a second.
RAINBOW DASH POV
Friends… FRIENDS?! I rocked Bizarro’s world and he wanted to be friends?!
It took everything I had to not explode at Bizarro. I mean sure, we didn’t do the three-date rule, and sure we never even asked him out, but everypony knows that when you buck you’re pretty much together until you break up. What, did he think it was a one-time thing and there wouldn’t be more?
I just didn’t get it, I mean Bizarro was much more enthusiastic than some Stallions are. I mean, he didn’t even need any coaxing to stick it in my flank! Not to mention that he seemed happy when I was sucking him off. I knew Stallions usually didn’t like that stuff and I was stoked that Bizarro wasn’t only okay with it, but he seemed to love it since he grabbed my head and pushed me down on his crotch again and again.
My throat ached after that, but I felt so empty without his cock filling it up.
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“You know, ponies used to say Bizarro were disturbed, that me am monster. And me believe them.
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Ch. ?. Bizarro Abridged. A.K.A. American Idiot.
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“Helllllllo Equestria!” Discord said as he popped up in the middle of the room.
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“Allow me to introduce myself. I am Discord, Master, King, Spirit, and God of both Chaos and references. And I’ve come bearing gifts.” Discord introduced.
“Gifts?” I asked the once imprisoned god.
“Yes, you see I had a lovely one sided conversation with myself and I figured, ‘why not change up the story? Why let what I read in those silly journals dictate my life?’ So, after that whole thing with that other reality warper happened there was enough chaos in the air to allow me to escape my prison and I decided to do something nice for the Elements of Harmony.” He said before snapping his claws and summoning the elements on the necks and head of their respective bearers.
“But only for them, sorry you two, but I’ll think of something to get you both.” He said as he glanced over at me and Trixie. “For the rest of you however I’ve devised a list of gifts for each of you. For Applejack an extra hundred acres or land for your apple trees along with dozens of employees who will work for dirt cheap costs but still put all their effort in, and contracts with several companies making it so they can only use, eat, and sell Sweet Apple Acres products.” Discord said as he snapped his tail and gave Applejack a dozen legal documents.
“For Pinkamena Dianne Pie I have also increased her family’s rock farm and employee count, as well as created the infinity cook book. A cook book with infinite recipes of any desert ever created or imagined.” Discord snapped again, this time using his tongue to do it, giving Pinkie Pie her infinity cook book which she surprisingly backed away from. I didn’t notice it earlier, but Pinkie Pie was glaring at the strange creature and kept her hand on her element, almost as if she was ready to use it with the others at any second.
“The next one is a twofer. Fluttershy and Rarity will become gods of the fashion industry with Rarity using the rarest materials on Equis to create stunning outfits for Fluttershy to wear as she struts down the aisle with a newfound sense of confidence given to her by this nifty little meddle. It belonged to a very brave lion before I got it. Oh, and speaking of animals you have already been signed up to donate a large sum of any profits earned to go directly to each and every animal charity in Equestria.” Discord finished as he snapped his talons, putting the meddle the Cowardly Lion got from the movie The Wizard of Oz. Fluttershy seemed to stand a bit taller as the meddle was placed on her new green dress, which also appeared when Discord snapped his talons.
“What do I get?” Rainbow Dash squealed with joy.
“Oh, not much, Captain Dash.”
“Captain?” Rainbow Dash asked as she tilted her head.
“Yes, Captain of the Wonderbolts. Captain Dash, fastest flyer in all of Equestria~. So fast that you should be able to congratulate Scootaloo on miraculously learning how to fly out of nowhere. I wonder how that happened…” Discord said innocently as if he had nothing to do with it.
“Really!? I gotta go and—“
“Up-up-up. We still have one pony who hasn’t gotten a gift. Twilight~.” I really don’t like the shifty eyes he gave Twilight.
“For you I have decided to unlock my library. I have quite the collection of books from stories my old friend Phantom told me. Different histories that had yet to pass, different types of magic that I took and… ‘enhanced’, along with books about an entirely different universe. Just use this key on any door and you’ll get there.” He said as he pulled out a key from his chest and handed it to a wide-eyed Twilight.
“And the last gift for you Twilight is friendship.” He said before snapping his lion’s paw with a menacing grin on his face. The next thing I knew, my vision completely faded as I blacked out.
TRIXIE POV
“BIZZARO!” The girls and I called out as Bizarro passed out.
“What did you do?!” I yelled at Discord.
“Oh, nothing much, I just tweeked his personality a bit. Now he’ll be able to actually hold a conversation, and he’ll be nicer to look at too. Anyway, now that that’s done I need payment for my gifts. After all, nothing is free in this world.” He said as he pulled a calculator out of his mouth and started adding numbers.
“But that’s the entire point of gifts!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed with a strange sense of anger building up in her voice as she held onto her new cookbook.
“Well, I’m the Spirit of Chaos, what did you expect? At first, I was going to torment you all and make you into opposite versions of yourselves but Phantom’s books taught me how stupid that plan was. Plus, if she predicted it, then there’s no WAY I’m doing it, that’d be boring. Besides, her old journals taught me something very important. Friendship is magic, and exploitable~.” Discord said mockingly as he as he held up a sticky note with the word “Bill” written on it, along with crude drawing of the Elements of Harmony on it.
“You want your presents, I want your elements. But, instead of just taking them I thought we’d make this a fun game. Rainbow Dash is the Element of Loyalty,” He said, pointing at Rainbow Dash. “and she would do anything for her friends, much like Bizarro. But would she be willing to betray her friends to help dear Scootallo?”
“ARE YOU THREATENING SCOOTS!?” Rainbow Dash yelled at Discord.
“No, no, no~. I’m just wondering how sad she would be to suddenly lose the gift of flight after she just got it. But, she can keep it, and you can all keep your gifts if you hand over one Element each. But there’s a caaaaatch.~
“It MUST be taken from one of the other Element Bearers. I won’t accept the Element of Loyalty from Dash, but I will accept it if Applejack gave it to me, allowing her to keep her precious gift and help her family. I mean, all that money could do wonders for her dear old aging Granny.” Discord said as he ran a finger down Applejack’s cheek. She pulled her fist back and attempted to punch him but Discord’s face just opened a hole big enough for Applejack’s fist to pass through.
“An what if we refuse yer gifts? Or if we jus use the Elements on ya now?” Applejack asked angrily after Discord used Granny Smith’s health as a weapon against her.
“Oh, well you all go back to your ordinary lives. Fluttershy won’t be brave, Scotallo will lose her flying, Rainbow Dash will be kicked out of the Wonderbolts, all contracts will be null and void, and I’ll take away Pinke’s infinite recipe book. But for Twilight, well that’s special! Not only will she be kicked out of my Chaos library, but she’ll never see her precious friend, Bizarro, again. So, go ahead and use the elements to imprison me, I dare you.” Discord explained as he smiled maliciously.
“YOU BASTARD!” Twilight shouted as she launched a volley of spells at Discord which he turned into rubber duckies that mooed and floated like balloons.
“Honestly Twilight, language. I’m starting to think Bizarro is a bad influence on you. Anywho, I’ll be back in a week for the elements if you decide to give them. Tata for now.” Discord said as he faded away into a dust cloud and flew out the window while laughing maniacally.
The girls stared defiantly at where Discord just floated, while I looked at Bizarro. Slowly, Bizarro stood back up a completely different Stallion. Bizarro’s skin smoothed out and turned a tan color, while his mane gained a blue tinted hue to it and was slicked back.
His spine cracked and popped into place as he straightened his posture, allowing him to stand just a few inches taller than he did before. Once he turned around we were able to see that the symbol on his suit was flipped backwards, and his costume also looked completely brand new.
His face was almost completely different, every minor imperfection completely eradicated and replaced with well defined muscles and smooth features.
“Bizarro, are you alright?” I asked in concern.
“Yes, but sorry Missy. I don’t know who ‘Bizareio’ is. I’m Superman.” Bizarro, or rather, Superman said.
“Bizarro, what happened to you?” Twilight asked.
“I already told you, I’m Superman. And nothing happened. I feel great! I still love America and Baseball, and the Democratic system America has is still the best and can still never be beaten.” (I wrote this before 2020) Superman said with pride swelling in his voice while we all stared at him with a mixture of confused expressions.
“Ummm. Is it just me or does Biz make less sense than usual?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“God Bless the U.S.A.” Superman said as he held out an arm for a Bald Eagle to land on. “Hello there my bald American bird friend, fly away and get me the President.” Superman told the Bald Eagle who just tilted its head in confusion.
“… … Go on, shoo you dumb bird.” Superman said as he shook his arm, causing the Bald Eagle to fly away.
“That wasn’t very nice.” Fluttershy chastised.
“Oh God, what are you, some sort of Tree Hugger?” Superman asked.
“How did you know my friend’s name?”
“Wait! Your friend is named Tree Hugger?! OH NO! You’re all Hippies aren’t you!? You won’t get me with your vile Devil Grass and Drum Circles, even if it’s 4:20pm on April 20th. And you should all be ashamed that you celebrate that day! Don’t you know that’s Hitler’s birthday? That makes you second hand Nazis. Nazi Hippies! Nippies!” Superman told us. No words could describe the amount of confusion we all felt.
“Wait, where am I? Is this Europe? Oh god, please tell me it’s not Canada! I can’t go back there to that backwards land of maple syrup people!” Superman said.
“Bizarro, calm down. You’re in Equestria, remember?” Twilight asked.
“Where’s that, it sounds Russian. *GASP* That’s it! You’re Communists! That’s slightly worse than Hippies! Well guess what, you’ll never steal my all-American blood you Commie Vampires.”
“Bizarro, you need to calm down. Nopony is going to hurt you.” Twilight said as she held up her hands in a calming gesture.
“You’re gosh darn right. As an American Citizen, and I hereby claim amnesty on your Communist soil. HA! Now you can’t touch me.” Superman said as he crossed his arms. “Beat that you filthy Communist.”
“I… I don’t even…Ugh…” Twilight groaned as she buried her face in her hands.
…
Pinkie Pie placed a hand on Twilight’s shoulder.
“Don’t worry Twily. I got this!” Pinkie Pie said before she bounced over to Superman as she whispered something in his ear.
“whisper, whisper, whisper, America, whisper, whisper, Cheeseburger, whisper, whisper.”
Superman’s eyes shot wide open. “What?! Not on my American made watch! I’m not gonna let some Anarchist take away my God given American freedom. Whoever this Discardo creep is I’ll make sure to kick his ass to the moon! Lead the way, pink skinned Hippie.”
“You got it boss.” Pinkie Pie saluted before she bounced away with Superman close in tow.
Applejack walked up next to Pinkie Pie and leaned over to her. “What did ya’ll whisper about?” She asked.
“You don’t know? I just said Whisper a few times and said America and Cheeseburger.” Pinkie Pie answered.
“And it was the most beautiful speech I ever heard, even if it did come from a pink skinned Hippie. MLK Junior, eat your heart out.” Superman said.
Deciding not to question… that. We followed them into the hedge maze.
“So, Bizarro, do you remember me?” I asked.
“Listen Missy, I already said Im not this Bizareio guy. I’m Superman. Who exactly is this Bizareio person anyway?”
“Trixie and Bizarro were traveling performers.” I informed him, hoping I could jog his memory.
“Ooooh. I see, so you two are bums.” He said.
My face contorted in anger at his rude comment as the others just stared at him. “We were not bums! Trixie and Bizarro made ponies happy with our performances.” I defended.
“Please. You should focus and get a real job like that Clark Kent guy. He works at an American newspaper company and does a great job. He’s an all-around upstanding American, you could learn a thing or two from him.” Super-prick told me.
“It is a real job! And both Trixie and Bizarro liked doing it! You’re just a big jerk!”
“I’m not a jerk, I’m a realist. An American realist. But not the kind in Real-estate though, believe me, I tried. Selling an underground mansion that’s in the North Pole is hard. Mostly because it’s not in America.” He said. I walked a bit faster so I wouldn’t be near that bastardization of Bizarro.
…
“Again with this Zubaz guy, I’m. Not. Him. I’m Superman, ya know, the best hero on Earth and, more importantly, America? Maybe you know me better as the living reincarnation of Jesus?”
“Who?”
“My god! How do you not know who the son of God is? No! Don’t tell me you’re an Atheist as well Twinkle.”
…
“How dare you call me an alien, I’m an American.”
“Bizarro said Superman was born on Krypton.”
“Nope. I was born in Kansas, good old Kansas America.”
“But Bizarro said—“
“That was obviously a lie, just fake news to make me look bad.”
…
“I have a plan. You all distract him and I’ll punch him in the back of the head like a real American.”
…
“You? Loyalty? HAH! Pah-lease. You’re hardly loyal.”
“Oh Yeah? I’m loyal to all of my friends!”
“Really?” Discord asked in a mocking tone. “Well, maybe you do for your Pony fiends, but where was your loyalty to your foalhood friend, Gilda, hmmm? She was clearly uncomfortable and you basically abandoned her. And Pinkie Pie, Element of Laughter making Gilda upset, for shame! Not only that, but you also refused to be nice ti Zecora until she helped you. Element of Laughter? HA! I guess you can make me laugh at how pathetic you are.” Discord mocked as Pinkie Pie’s stance faltered.
“Hey! You leave her alone!” Fluttershy surprisingly shouted.
“Oooh, why if it isn’t Fluttershy, element of Kindness. The same one who was acting aggressive towards an old dragon to scare him out of his home. Tell me, how is that dragon doing now, still alive?” Discord asked as he filed his lion claws with a red nail file.
“W-what?”
“It’s a simple question really. I mean, he’s going to sleep for a hundred years, did he find a safe spot to nap? Did you make sure he had all of his gold with him when he left? Because that would have been kind. Wait, don’t tell me… You didn’t, did you? No. You just scared him off without caring about his safety.”
…
“Rarity, element of Generosity taking advantage of Spike’s friendship so she could use him as a tool to feed.”
…
“The element of Honesty, the biggest liar in all of Ponyville.”
“Now ‘ang on there, ah never once told a fib!”
“Really? So, you didn’t do anything in Manhattan when you were about Applebloom’s age?” He asked cryptically. Applejack’s eyes widened in horror at Discord’s question.
“H-how’d you know about that?” Applejack stammered as she took a fearful step back. Discord just rolled his eyes before he blinked, turning his eyes into an infinite cosmos.
“Um, heeellllllllloooo? Omnipotent, remember?” He asked before his eyes turned back into their normal sickly yellow color.
“It’s funny really. Elements of Harmony? HAH! Elements of Hypocrisy is more like it. If you are supposed to represent all that is right with Equestria, then it’s clear things have only gone downhill since I was last here.”
…
“Oh of course. How could I forget about the ‘magic of friendship.’ bleh. Though I suppose magic of convenience is a bit of a mouth full.”
…
“Tell me, Twilight, would you really be friends with any of them if it weren’t for the Elements? Can you tell me with a straight face that if Nightmare Moon never attacked and you left Ponyville you’d still consider them your friends, the ponies you thought were rude, loud, obnoxious, and weird? Would you have really stayed behind?”
…
“Sharing is caring.”
“Those are the words of a communist, Applefritter. I expected better from an American like you.” Superman shot back.
…
TWILIGHT POV
…
It was a book written by someone called Ms. Phantom.
I distinctly remembered Discord talking about somepony named Phantom
…
The war of Sorrow, after two long years of battle, death, and rape, is almost at an end. My final siege on the Caribou Kingdom will end in one of two ways, either I shall be remembered in history as a failure, or I won’t be remembered at all. Part of me mourns for those who will fall, family and neighbors who, in their own eyes, committed no sins. But then I remember their King, and how brainwashed the Caribou species as a whole became.
To think that I once considered letting them be our friends, I could have saved so many more lives if I wasn’t so naive back then. Even after twenty-five years, that part of me that wanted nothing more than eternal friendship still clings to my conscious mind.
Marros doesn’t agree with my plan, but what else is there to do? We can’t sit in a drum circle and sing kumbiyah like this was all one big misunderstanding. The Caribou species as a whole wouldn’t accept the new Equestrian leadership once we passed it on to Celestia and Luna, they would have retaliated to preserve their ideology and force it onto us. I refuse to let out little ponies be subjected to that torture, forced to become slaves and pets to any species.
…
Chapter ?…
RARITY POV
…
But one question was the loudest in my mind. Who should I give my element to?
I hated this game that Discord had created, and I absolutely refused to steal any of my friend’s elements for something as petty as fame and fortune. But, that didn’t mean I wouldn’t give up my element to one of them. Discord had never said it was against the rules to give another Element Bearer your element, so I could in theory help one of my friends, but which one?
Giving my element to Rainbow Dash would help her and Scootaloo, I didn’t want her to gain something like flight only to lose it immediately, it would absolutely crush the little filly. But then there’s also the possibility of helping Applejack, I knew she wouldn’t say it out loud but Granny Smith does need a better income if they want to afford better medication for her. The poor dear is Applejack’s only connection to her parents, and losing her would be like losing her mother and father all over again. And then there’s Twilight, if I didn’t help her we may never be able to see Bizarro again!
Bizarro accepted me for who I am despite what he and Trixie went through, even my friends didn’t trust me. I could taste their resentment, their anger, their fear when I came out. But Bizarro, despite going through such a horrible experience with those two changelings, accepted me. Not only that but he was also practically dripping guilt for how I felt.
…
“I-I’m sorry.” Rainbow Dash said as she refused to meet my eyes. “I-I just didn’t know what to do, okay?! I… I can’t let Scoots get hurt… Here.” Rainbow Dash said as she held out her own element to me.
“I was…. I was going to leave this here for you and Fluttershy so that I could make up for taking your Element… I’m sorry, Rarity.”
…
"Well Twilight, you were Celestia's student, but who do you think was HER teacher, hmm? Discord wasn't always my name, I actually used to have a much sweeter, kinder, and boooooring name."
"What… What was it?" I hesitantly asked. A wicked smile crept across Discord's face as he looked down at me with mirth dancing in his eyes.
"I used to be Marrow Marras, the Prince of Friendship.~"
…
"Oh what? Did you think there weren't any Equestrian Princes or Princesses before Tia and Lulu? Who do you think convinced ponies to give up their magic for their friends so the sun and moon could rise?"
"N-no. No! That can't be true!"
"But it is!" Discord cheered happily. "I was the Unicorn Prince of Friendship before I learned my most important friendship lesson of all. In the end, you are your only friend." Discord smiled sadistically as he looked at me before he pointed a talon at me in a mocking manner.
"And guess what? Now you learned that lesson! In the end, when you needed your friends most, after everything you did for them all of your friends abandoned you. Face it Twilight, you're alone with only one friend in the whole world, yourself." Discord mocked as he floated around me and continued to gloat.
"Alone, alone, alone. Has a nice ring to it doesn't it? Twilight Alone Sparkle, the friendless pony protege."
…
"Do you think I was the only one to become corrupted? I was simply the third royal to be corrupted in an ever-growing line. I was a hero, a great stallion who had dozens of friends. I was the reason they were even alive, if not for me they'd never learn about the cure for Poison Joke. And do you know how they repaid me? They abandoned me! I needed them when those disgusting bugs attacked and where were they? Gone!
"After I was corrupted and subsequently frozen, Luna was corrupted. She was the Princess of Protection, defending her little Ponies from all the ghastly things that went bump in her beautiful night. But alas, nopony appreciated her. She learned the lesson that protecting Ponies is a thankless job, and so she turned into an attacker. Now I'm going to teach Celestia, princess of Hope, a lesson she'll never forget. Hope is worthless when faced by reality."
…
“So? We’re more than enough to take Disco-Ball down!”
“How?! We don’t have the Elements, my ‘friends’ aren’t any help, and you can’t even touch Discord! It’s hopeless, we lost.”
“Lost? Now you listen here, Twizzler, we haven’t lost because Losing is what losers do! And we’re not losers! Do you know what we are?” He rhetorically asked. Before I could reply with a snide remark he continued on as if my input didn’t matter. “We’re winners! This is just a set back.”
“How is this a set back? This is a complete and total failure.”
“It’s only a failure if you let it be, Twister. Just because you're alone now doesn't mean you'll always be alone. You think I was happy living in a place literally called 'The Fortress of Solitude' far away from America and my friends in Smallvile? No! It sucked and I hated it, but I wasn't alone forever.
"At first, I thought friends would just come to me because I'm so awesome, but being in a frozen tundra made that difficult. So, I left and tried to look for friends. Friendship is like patriotism, it's an effort that we all must strive towards.
"It's like my best friend, Bruce, always says. 'Dammit Superman I don't want to be friends. Now get out of my Batcave so I can brood.’ But you know what? I didn't get out. I stayed in there as long as I could, I even tore down some of the walls when I kept going back in, pounding through his defenses with ease as my fists thrusted through his walls. You see Twister, when you have friends you have to keep pushing, and pushing and eventually, you'll make great friends. I pushed Bruce more and more and got him to be more open with our team, heck I think I saw him smile a few times. And you know what, he pushed me too, I became a better friend and a slightly better American because I realized something.
“You see, despite being the reincarnation of Jesus and an American, I'm not perfect. I put my underwear on one leg at a time like every other American. Friends push each other to their limits to learn the best and the worst about themselves, and no matter how hard they push you can't fall down. So, are you going to give up and smoke some Mary Janes to calm your nerves or are you gonna get up and help me beat up an Anarchist and push people around like a real American?" Superman asked me as he held out his hand for me to grab. I was shocked by his words, despite seeming so self-centered and egotistical, he made a good point, at least it seemed like it. I still didn't know what a Mare-can was, but I understood what he meant about friendship. Friends push each other to be their best, and I'd be damned if I didn't push harder to get my friends back!
“Now, you and me might not be the traditional hero team-up types, but I'll be damned if we aren't gonna save the world. So, what do you say Twizzlepop?” Superman asked, hitting the final nail in the coffin as I grabbed his hand and hoisted myself up. This wasn’t just about friendship, it was about preserving our way of life, helping others, and doing the best we could. And he was right, we’d be damned if we didn’t save the world.
…
“Oh, and what do you think you can do? I’m the one holding all the cards here.” Discord said as decks of cards came flying at Superman from every direction. Superman flew around attempting to dodge the playing cards before an Alicorn of hearts popped out of her card and slashed Superman across his chest with her sword. Blood trickled from Superman’s wound like a leaky faucet, the red color of his blood filling in the yellows of his symbol. Superman looked at the blood with a neutral gaze before his eyes glanced up at Discord.
“Let me ask you something Discordo. As my bestest best buddy, Bruce, once said, ‘Do you Bleed’?” He asked Discord.
“Well I—“ Discord was cut off as a barrage of red energy blasts came out of Superman’s eyes.
“Because I bleed AMERICAN JUSTICE! And as long as Grade A American blood pumps through my veins I’ll fight for honor! Liberty! And Facebook likes!”
…
Superman backed away from the element of generosity fearfully.
“K… Kryptonite?! My… My weakness… Why is there Kryptonite here?”
…
“Omnipotent? Hello? Of course I could handle this little pest. It was fun playing with him for a bit, but he’s honestly lost his charm.”
…
“You’re not perfect little ponies, you’re horrible! The fact that Celestia and Luna even let you run around as heroes shows how far Equestria has fallen.”
“You’re right…” I admitted quietly. Discord abruptly stopped laughing as he and my friends all looked at me with confused expressions.
“Um. Beg pardon?” He asked with a raised eyebrow.
“We were wrong! We haven’t been the best of ponies all the time, and yes, we’ve made mistakes but we learn from those mistakes. There are many things I’ve done that I want to take back, times where I was being a horrible friend, times where I thought I didn’t deserve buy friends because I did or said something stupid or hurt their feelings. But that doesn’t make any of us terrible. I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not perfect, in fact I don’t think anypony can be. We go through everyday making at least one mistake, saying one thing wrong, or offending somepony on accident.” I told Discord as I took a step forward.
“And those mistakes, from the smallest to the largest, eat away at our minds whether we want them to or not. We all have faults, we’ve all done bad things, but that doesn’t make us bad. We may have done things that were wrong, but we’ll always strive to do our best and make up for those things. We may not be perfect, but that doesn’t stop us from trying to be the best versions of ourselves. We won’t stop helping each other just because of a few mistakes. Those mistakes push us to become better, and help us push our friends up when they need it.
“The magic of Friendship and Forgiveness!”
…
“I’m you’re worst nightmare. An American.” Superman said as he punched Discord in the face. “Feel the iron fist of American brand JUSTICE!”
…
“Gah! What’s happening to me?!” Superman asked as his skin began to turn white. “M-my Posture… Changing… Face…. turning less beautiful… Me fell…. less Patriotic. God…. Bless…. Ugh….”
“BIZZARO!” We all screamed as Bizarro fell over.
When we rushed over to him, we turned him over and laid him on his back. His costume was back to normal, tears and all. His face… His beautiful chiseled face was back, and his blue eyes weren’t as powerful as they were when he wen’t crazy.
“Ugh… Bizarro am feel… Weird… Why mouth am taste like Cheeseburger?” He asked. The girls and I all hugged him tightly.
…
“You betrayed me, you. You… Where were you?!” Marrow asked as he fell to his knees. “I-I, y-you said you’d be there. T-that I could trust you two. I-I believed in you.”
“We are so sorry, Marras.”
...
Chapter ?…
BIZARRO POV
…
“I think proper introductions are in order now, Mr. Luthor. My name is Marrow, Marrow Marras.”
…
"So, you have her journals then?"
"Unfortunately, no. While I was Discord, I translated the entries until they reached my return. After I read about my defeat, I flew into a.... bit of a fit and destroyed all the journals I had. But, I did notice something, or rather, didn't I notice something.
…
"I always found it odd that her predictions never mentioned herself. It was as if she didn't see herself in those visions, which makes sense since during those events she would be trapped with the rest of the Crystal Empire. But now, we have another missing character from the story. Not once is Bizarro mentioned in any of her predictions, he's not even alluded to."
"So what are you trying to say?"
"I'm... I'm saying that I'm worried. We changed a few outcomes with her knowledge, stopping the pony of shadows, defeating the sirens, and getting rid of the Tantabus. Not to mention that I screwed up time by not corrupting the Elements as she predicted.
"I remember some parts from my time as Discord. She foresaw a plethora of threats, many of which I ignored after I read my chapter. I was too… I guess insulted? Angry? There was just something I didn’t like about having my life already determined while I was Discord.”
…
“Our teacher sacrificed herself to trap Sombra inside a prison outside of space and time, but at the cost of trapping the entire Crystal Empire with her.
…
“Perhaps since he is from another world he wasn’t forseen?”
“Maybe.
…
“Ah…. Ah lied ta Applebloom and ‘er friends. I also lied ta Granny, ta Big Mac, I even lied ta man friends.
“I lied about how I got mad Cutie mark…” Applejack admitted.
“I told Applebloom and everypony else that I got it when I left Manehatten and moved back ta Ponyville when I was younger, but I lied. I didn’t get it when I got back ta the farm, ah got it before then…”
….
“I didn’t earn it. I cheated. I lied and I cheated ta get ahead.
“There was this Minotaur in Manehatten, really good with… making tattoos… Ah asked ‘im ta give me a matchin’ pair of apples on each side a man flank so it’d look like a Cutie mark. I was so ashamed of leaving’ Granny and Big Mac, an’ I didn’t wanna come back lookin’ like a failure. So, I paid the Minotaur ta give me a fake Cutie mark so that ah could make Granny an Big Mac proud, so I could make mahself happy…”
…
Chapter ? The Redundant Rock Farm.
…
Crushing the coal had become a tedious and mind-numbing task in a very short amount of time. I got so bored that I eventually started crushing it with my armpits for shits and giggles.
…
To Be Continued in Part 3...
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