Venting · 7:49pm May 30th, 2020
So I read a story on FIMFic today, and now I need to get some things out. Dunno if anyone will read this. Doesn't really matter if they do. very little editing. sorry if it's hard to follow.
– ohokayohokayohokayohokay –
A little over a month ago, my mother had a manic episode.
She had been hiding her failure to take her medication for seven years, roughly aligning with finishing the complement of mail-order meds that would have arrived just before her father died.
Every night before bed, she told Dad she was gonna go take her meds... and she just didn't take them.
Her mother, my grandmother, died in September last year, we interred her in October. Dad thinks that's what set my mother off.
At first we thought she was just coming out of her funk. She was actually organizing things and sorting through to see what we should keep and what should go... then she started shredding napkins. And then she started reading aloud everything she got her hands on and when she wasn't reading everything was still in the same breathless continuous run-on sentence hey Fieryshaman you know how to do a fireman's carry right no oh okay we should get a fire extinguisher both a living will and a durable healthcare pee oh ayy allow you to choose someone you trust to make certain medical choices on your behalf you must be at least 18 to create either document and you must be of sound mind that means no one is allowed to coerce you into making a living will or healthcare power of attorney differences a living will is limited to deathbed concerns only and is used to declare your desire to not have life-prolonging measures be taken if there’s no hope of recovery for example in the event of brain death or terminal illness lunch is ready oh,okay!
You get the idea.
I spent the last 3 years of my life trying to be on hand to help with her mother as her mother sunsetted. I was and am terrified of getting a job outside the home in case something happens.
last year it happened. Grandma just... slid out of bed onto the floor. Mom called me to help. I was the one who made the call for emergency services to help us get her off the floor. I was the one who took initiative that my grandmother needed to go to the hospital instead of just back into bed. everything hurt and grandma just couldn't/wouldn't exert any effort to get herself off the floor. It took 5 firefighters to lift her onto the gurney. I visited grandma once in the hospital to bring her some fresh undergarments because my mother was sick. She didn't recognize me. about four days after that, they brought grandma home to see what sorts of physiotherapy they should focus on to build her strength. Grandma eventually started howling about her pain levels and they bundled her back to the hospital. Grandma was dead by sunset.
Mom's on her meds again, everything is stabilizing, and we'll find my father's birth certificate one way or the other.
Thanks for reading, and thanks for the follows.
And while I'm saying thank you... Go give Estee some upvotes. The Triptych Continuum and Estee's blog posts are a big reason for why I'm at all coherent right now. Brightened a lot of dark times for me.
"gives you a hug"
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Thank you for the positivity. Have a great day!