Simulacrum: Chapter 2 edits · 11:56pm Nov 19th, 2012
tl;dr: Added a paragraph to continue Twi's uncertainty, removed Gilda-Dash section, added followup to the 'Loyalty' talk from last chapter.
“It’s not that bad,” I muttered under my breath, but I knew the truth, even if I didn't want to admit it to myself. How much longer before the degradation reached my central nervous system? Or before I became paralyzed?
Was this... was this really worth it? Even if I don't die from this, I'll probably end up with permanent nerve damage, maybe even paralyzed. Unable to move, unable to go to the bathroom without any help, unable to even have fun with my friends. That is... if they'd even want to spend time with an invalid. Would I even be allowed to perform magic anymore? Or partake in scientific enquires? Even if I didn't die, would it be a life worth living?
Ducking my head under, the biting cold was a soothing relief from the constant burning.I only pulled my head out after I felt like I was drowning. Sure, it hurt, but now it was just a dull throb, and that was far better than anything else I had experienced so far. After three more repeats, I crawled out of the water and began shaking the water out like a dog. All the while, Spitfire watched me with a hooded gaze.
"We need to talk." It wasn't a suggestion or a statement, it was an order.
Nonetheless, I forced it down with a shudder. Hopefully I won't get some disease from this, that'd just be stupid. I turned my head to the side, entire body shuddering as I began coughing. Doubled over and on my knees, each cough coated the snow in a fresh layer of red. After almost an entire minute, I lay there in my own fluids, panting heavily.When I heard the others approaching I scrambledonto my hooves to brush some snow over the patch of red. Taking the largest bite of grass I could stomach, I began chewing the disgusting thingin an attempt to look busy.
"I'm turning in for the night. Dash, you've got first watch," ordered Spitfire as she grabbed one of the heating crystals. Within seconds her snoring filled the air.
"I should probably do the same," I said with a yawn.
"Wait, Twi." A hoof was placed on my shoulder. "We need to talk."
"Not you too," I groaned.
"Not about your medication." She gave me that easygoing smile of hers. "For what it's worth, I believe you."
"Thanks."
"No worries, Twi. I've always got you back." Dash sat down next to me. "But what was up with your questions yesterday? I mean, is there something you're not telling me?"
"I-" I licked my dry lips and saw the concern in her eyes. "I'm fine."
As much as I wanted to break down and confess everything, I couldn't do that to Dash. I still remembered what Discord did to her, and the mere thought of forcing her into another impossible decision made my heart ache. That day still haunted my nightmares.
"You sure?"
"Yeah." Once more I found that fake smile plastered all over my face. "I was just asking because I came across it in this fascinating ethical textbook I found in the library was all. It was actually on the Elements of Harmony, and went through what each meant, how they applied to everyday life, how to live life according to th-"
"Yaaaaaawn." Rainbow Dash smirked at me, though her eyes still bore into mine. "You are such an egghead."
I smiled weakly. "Thanks Dash."
"For what?"
For more than you know. For everything.For being my friend. For being there when I needed you, and even when I didn't. There was so much to be said, but even a single word would have resulted in her finding out the truth about my condition, and that was something I could not allow. I wanted so badly to thank her for everything she had ever done. For every smile and laugh she had gotten out of me. For every memory she gave me.
Thank you, Rainbow Dash, for all that and more.
Instead of saying all that though, I simply gave her a genuine smile and said, "For being the awesomest pony ever. Equestria would be dreary place without you."
"Ha! You got that right." She flexed her muscles before nudging me. "Go get some sleep. You look like you're about to fall over dead any second."
"As if, it'll take more than a bit of a run to kill me," I replied. "Night, Dash."
"Night. Sleep well, Twi."
With a final glance at Dash, I lay down on the ground and hugged the heating crystal close to my heart. Perhaps it was as simple as Dash made it out to be. Everypony relied on Celestia, and her loss would be a greater blow than mine could ever be. Being loyal to Equestria, to everypony, meant I had to do this. I had to go through and push myself as far as possible. Plus, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't do everything in my power to save Celestia.
I just hope I can actually do this. That I can follow through with my actions.
Yeah, this looks good. I honestly thought that Gilda and Dash part seemed very out of place.
519942
Yeah. It was out of place, happened too quickly and forced me to scramble in later chapters so I decided to take it out and expand on Twilight's developing situation.