How Bittersweet Should Have Ended · 12:21am Jun 1st, 2017
To Donut Joe’s, the mane 6 were just having a nice conversation while consuming a sweet meal.
Twilight Sparkle was the one talking while her friends were either listening to her or pleasing their own appetite. As anypony would expect, Pinkie Pie had a ridiculously large pile of pastries in front of her.
“I think season 7 is going good so far. Sure, the secondary characters are having more screen time–”
“That’s unacceptable!” Rarity stomped her hoof on the table. “If things keep going on like this, season 8 is just going to introduce the next generation of main characters!”
“Oh, Rarity,” said Twilight, waving off the thought. “You’re just overreacting as usual.” Twilight smiled and pointed a hoof towards the deflating pile of sweets in front of her. “Why don’t you try being more like Pinkie.”
Rarity turned her head to watch her frivolous-minded friend, who was stuffing her mouth with as many pastries as she could. Also, she was wearing a pair of donut glasses. She had insisted on wearing them every time they went to Donut Joe’s, for some reason.
“*Nom nom nom* Gotta pee!”
Pinkie Pie released the pastry in mid air and ran away from the table, fast enough to disappear from sight. She even returned in time to catch the pastry before it fell down and she resumed feasting with all the pastries.
“*Nom nom nom…*”
“…How do you do that?” asked Rarity with a blank expression.
Pinkie shoved a Sicilian cannolo inside her mouth and turned to Rarity. “Um, could you be more specific?”
“Sorry,” said Rarity, “I meant–”
“Because I'm Pinkie Pie.”
Rarity frowned and shot an annoyed glare to Pinkie Pie.
“You didn’t even let me fin–”
Before Rarity could finish, Pinkie bolted from her seat and yelled, “Bathroom!”
She disappeared and was back in a blink, merrily licking five lollipops at once.
“…I hope you washed your hooves, at least,” bitterly said Rarity.
Pinkie paused her binge to reply. “Of course, I don’t want to get sick or anything. Being sick is bad. Oh, gotta pee again!” Then, she disappeared, reappeared, and resumed eating. “We were saying?”
“If we are done with interruptions,” sourly said Rarity, “I was wondering how is it possible for you to eat so many treats without gaining weight.”
Pinkie opened her mouth way and squirted a pipe of whipped cream over her tongue. With her lips still white and creamy, she smiled widely and shrugged.
“That’s just criminal,” muttered Rarity with a voice filled with envy. “Really, if there’s any sort of divine justice in this world, shall you know that something horrible will happen to you because of this.”
“Meh, as long as I can do this.” Just like that, Pinkie took a box of sugar and poured it on a pie. Once there was a pyramid over it, Pinkie ate the whole pie with one bite causing everypony to giggle. “Yummy!”
Right then, a brown unicorn came nearby eyeing Pinkie with concern.
“Excuse me. My name is Doctor Hooves, and I couldn’t help but notice how often you went to the bathroom… and the large amount of sweets that you’re eating. Would you mind if I did a quick check?”
“Huh?” Pinkie Pie looked the pony in a funny way as he used a quick spell towards her, pursed his lips, and nodded affirmatively.
“Yup, you have diabetes.”
Everypony watched the doctor in silence.
Slowly, they all spun her heads towards Rarity, who was simply looking in front of her with empty eyes.
Suddenly, she cried out loud in panic.
“I SWEAR IT WASN’T ME!”
“I’ll ask because I really want to be sure,” said Twilight with concern. “You want me to cast a spell in order to bring our very deceased friend back to life.”
Rarity nodded. “That's accurate.”
Twilight stared at her friend in silence.
“I know, I should have thought of this idea sooner.” Rarity wrinkled her eyebrows and looked up. “What can I say, the funeral had a bad impact on my psyche.”
“Clearly,” muttered Twilight. Then she hemmed, cleared her throat, and smiled politely. “Would you mind staying here for just a few minutes?”
“But what about the resurrecting ritual?” asked Rarity as she followed Twilight with her head as her friend hurriedly went for the door.
“That's exactly why I need a moment,” said Twilight, closing shut the door behind her.
So, Rarity had to wait alone as Twilight did whatever she had to.
“I really hope she’ll be done soon. I wanted to invite Pinkie to have a tea with us all today.”
Finally, the door opened and Twilight entered, leading two big ponies with nursing outfits.
“Darling,” chirped Rarity, “got what you need?”
“Yep,” said Twilight with an eager nod of her head, “these two gentlecolts will provide you all the help you need.”
“Wonderful!” Rarity turned towards the two with a polite smile. “So you two are experts on bringing back the livings from death, I take?”
One of the two ponies shot a sad look to his partner, who stepped forward, smiled reassuringly and said, “Ja, we will helpfe dir indeed, fräulein.”
Two minutes later, Rarity was tied to a straityoke between the two nurse, headed to the nearer mental clinic.
“Make sure she sees a good therapist,” said Twilight to them as they went out.
“Worry nicht, Tvilight,” said one of them. “Der fräulein ist in good hooves.”
Or…
“I myself do not hold the solution, but by taking a detour you will reach your conclusion.” Zecora pointed towards the west. “You must pass through all that hinders, and arrive at the Ruins of the Ancient Pony Sisters.”
“Why?” Rarity asked excitedly. “Is there a book there? A secret artifact? What’s there, darling?!”
Zecora shook her head. “All I can do is point you the direction, everything else is up to your discretion.”
“Wait?” asked Fluttershy. “So you do know a way for bringing Pinkie Pie back or not?”
Zecora narrowed her eyes. “Some things I know. Other things, I don’t.
Now bother me no more, ponies, so that I can eat some scone.”
Zecora motioned towards her kitchen, but she was stopped by Rarity’s bickering.
“Ok, but why are you pointing us to the ruins if you don’t know–”
“The stars will lead you, my friend. Follow them, if you want your journey to find a merry end.”
Confused by all that enigmatic advice, Fluttershy looked out through the window. “But… it’s daytime,” she pointed out.
“Who seek the village loses sight of the mountain, and right track isn’t quite.
Perhaps of my words you are doubting, but after you take a few steps back you’ll find the light.”
“Are you saying we should follow the sun?” asked Rarity. “But it’s noon! How are supposed to follow it if it’s exactly above our heads?”
“I’m a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout.
When I get all steamed out, then I shout. Sing it, tip me over and pour me out!”
Zecora wobbled her hooves around as Fluttershy and Rarity gaped in silence.
“Being an eremite in cool and easy, and nopony will notice if you’re crazy.
Truly, you can say every grime, as long as you do it in rhyme.”
Rarity and Fluttershy exchanged a wry look. “Ok, she’s clearly insane. Let’s just go home and forget about this entirely.”
And they did just that.
Magic surged through Twilight and the other ponies, rejuvenating their mind and bodies. The ponies felt as if they had unlimited power, and were surrounded by the warm glow of the rainbow.
The rainbow swallowed the two wolves up before they could get another word out. A brilliant flash of light filled the dark corners of the Ruins, and when it cleared…
The wolves were still there, unharmed and unamused.
“WHAT?” shouted Twilight. “HOW?”
Shadow held up a finger and explained, “Actually, your Harmony can only purify. Which means it has effect only on evil and corrupted creatures, while we are just bare wolves. And the play of predators and preys has always been part of the natural cycle of life.”
“Yup,” said Gruff. “So, what about we do some Harmony now?”
With a feral growl, the two wolves jumped on the five ponies and tore their flesh into pieces. It was a wild, brutal, and gory display.
All witnessed by the ghost of Pinkie Pie, even if no one noticed her.
“Gee, bad respawn,” said she.
BUT THIS IS HOW IT REALLY SHOULD HAVE ENDED…
All the mane 6… pardon, mane 5 stood next to the wooden coffin where Pinkie was now slumbering for the rest of eternity. They were trying hard to hold back their tears as the funeral procession was reaching its end. Only Princess Celestia was left to speak, and she was almost done with her elegy.
“…and lastly, I hope that my fateful students and her friends have brought along the Elements of Harmony, so that we can give our friend one last salute.”
Hearing the cue, Twilight and her friends wore the Elements and positioned Pinkie’s necklace on the coffin.
Straining a smile, Twilight went to her mentor and said, “Thank you for suggesting this. It was a nice way to give Pinkie a metaphorical goodbye.”
Princess Celestia cocked an eyebrow in confusion. “Metaphorical?”
Suddenly, all the Elements began to lit up and shine. Then, a colored beam was shot from every gem towards the coffin.
“Woah! What was that?” asked Twilight.
Celestia scratched her neck and looked away. “Uhh, my bad. I probably should have warned you sooner.”
Before Twilight could ask Princess Celestia what she meant, a giant pink pony form emerged from coffin and towered over all the presents.
“UUUUU. I’M A SPOOOKY GHOOOOOOOST!”
Screams of terror rose from the herd of ponies. Many fainted, others run away or started crying, and some even turned completely white for the fright.
Then, the giant ghost shrank into pony size and grabbed her belly, laughing madly. “Hahaha! Just kidding. It’s me, Pinkie Pie!”
Floating in midair, Pinkie Pie rolled back and forth as all the ponies still present overcame the shock or helped the friends who had passed out.
“I’m glad we could meet one last time,” said Princess Celestia, making her way to Pinkie Pie, “but I must ask you to release your element of laughter, so that your spirit can always rest in peace.”
“Okie-Dokie.” Pinkie Pie flew down on an earth-level and started to bring her hoof to her necklace, but she stopped with wide eyes just before she touched it.
“Actually, can we do one thing before that?” she asked.
AFTERMATH TO DONUT JOE’S WITH THE MANE 6
Another ridiculous large pile of pastries was gathered in front of ghost Pinkie Pie—who was wearing a pair of ghost donut-glasses—as the mane 6 stared at her blankly. Pinkie had been trying to bite the food for ten minutes now, with no avail since she was incorporeal.
“Awww… I wish I could take one last bite.”
Twilight facehoofed. “Seriously? That’s your last wish?”
“You mean, aside for knowing that you’re all happy? I’m Pinkie Pie. What else could I ever wish for?”
Twilight looked her deadpanned. “You do realize that’s the reason why you’re dead, right?”
“I regret nothing,” said Pinkie, chuckling. “Besides, it was a sweet death.”
“But are you really ok with going away?” asked Twilight incredulously. “Just like this?”
Fluttershy placed a hoof over Twilight’s shoulder. “It’s how it has to be, Twilight. All things have their time to die, and Pinkie has reached hers.” Looking to Pinkie, Fluttershy smiled warmly and said, “And even if we’re all going to miss you deeply, I know for sure that just the memory of you will brighten up our days.”
“Daw,” said Pinkie, scratching her head in embarrassment. “See? She gets it.”
“Oh, darling. Losing you will be worse than losing the rarest gem in the world.” Rarity stopped when she heard a sniffle from her right. Spinning her head, she was surprised to see Applejack rubbing her eyes with one hoof. “You are crying?”
“N- no. It’s just that… it’s just that Ah was trying to hide all my sorrow and pain behind a thick layer of anger and stubbornness but now you’re all bein’ talkin’ about feelings and…”
Applejack sniffled again, prompting Rarity to hug her close.
“There, there… it’s far more healthy to let it all out.”
“I don’t know if I can handle all this,” suddenly admitted Dash, pointing her head towards Pinkie. “Geez, I feel like… like I just want to fly away and–”
“That’s fine,” said Pinkie. “You need to take a break. Go for a vacation. Pay a visit to an old friend. It’s not like you have to stay in Ponyville forever.”
“Thanks. Also…” Rainbow Dash lowered her gaze. “Pinkie, I… I wanted to tell you–”
“Rainbow Dash…”
Rainbow Dash looked into Pinkie’s eyes.
Pinkie looked back into hers.
“…eat this, please?” asked Pinkie, pointing a cupcake.
Rainbow Dash wasn’t even surprised. She just groaned, reluctantly took the cupcake, and ate it in one bite under Pinkie’s vigilant watch.
A moment after she gulped, Pinkie stuck a hoof inside Dash’s stomach and pulled out a transparent cupcake.
“Got you, ghost cupcake!”
Grinning victoriously, Pinkie threw the cupcake inside her mouth and chew it.
Staggered, Twilight asked, “How did you–?”
“Because I’m Pinkie Pie.” Suddenly, Pinkie flew up and grabbed her stomach with both hoof, cringing in pain. “Argh! My ghost diabetes!”
And with that, ghost Pinkie Pie fell on her back a never moved again.
But a smaller, ghostier ghost came out from her chest.
“UUUUU…”
Twilight threw her hooves in the air. “O COME ON! HOW?”
“Becaaause I’m Piiinkie Piiie…”
READ FIRST COMMENT FOR A BONUS SCENE.
So, this one scene wasn't in the mix because I felt like I was going too harsh on Applejack, even if this is just meant to be for laughing.
Any chance we could get links to the original fics at the beginning of the post? It only occurred to me this time because this is the first one of the series that I hadn't already read.
Just a thought, keep up the good work
4554308 https://www.equestriadaily.com/2011/03/story-bittersweet.html
Usually, it's not necessary because it's possible to find the fic on the site (even though this isn't the case), but I'll think about that.
Thank you for the support.