• Member Since 27th Jan, 2014
  • offline last seen May 15th, 2019

Coconut of Doom

Every story has an ending, but in life every ending sparks a new beginning...

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Fear The Walking Dead Mid Season Ep. Review · 2:47am Aug 22nd, 2016


Ok, so... How long have I been waiting for this new episode? 4? 5? 6? 8 months? I don't even remember! But here is one thing... I waited on ABSOLUTE TRASH! That sums up everything for this new episode. Absolute fucking trash! The main character of the episode made so many fucking mistakes it ruined the whole episode for me.

There are spoilers ahead. You have been warned. IF you do not care, then, by all means, please continue.

Ok, so it began with Nick waking next to a corpse and a Mexican lady is standing over him. He decides to not stick with her and her son and walked off with a jug of water and a small pack. He then walks a good distance, in the open mind you, and eventually dusk sets in and he decides to settle down in house. Good idea, right? Nope.

He decides not to scout it out and make sure its not inhabited... and instead, settles down in the first room he finds, which has three doorways with no doors and a window. He builds a fire and sits down with his back to the open window. He makes no attempt at personal safety in a zombie apocalypse. He then decides to take a nice nap and wakes up to....remember when I said he decided not to scout the building out? Yeah, he wakes up to a Mexican lady beating him with a baseball bat while a little Mexican girl stands by and watches. He flees without his water and pack instead of, I don't know, retaliating against the woman who was trying to kill him. I'm not saying kill her, just subdue her, grab your stuff and leave. Idiot.

He then decided to stop at a wreck, reach inside a car and almost get bitten twice for a busted radio and nearly empty water bottle. Out of nowhere, a jeep (You know a murdering gang is occupying it if its a fucking jeep. So cliche.) pulls up with three psychos in it who loot the area. It was pretty clear they were murderers when they offed an old man who in a car sleeping. But, guess what? Nick decided to stay and watch them, and, get this....

He decided to run away right when they were right on top of him. He somehow dodged all the fucking bullets they shot at him and he got away. Walking walking walking, transition transition transition he falls asleep sitting against a blown-up van in the middle of the fucking desert and wakes up to two wild dogs trying to eat him. Where the fuck did the dogs come from? Where in the desert did they come from? Hell, why were they hungry? They looked well-fed! Then, out of NOWHERE, a walker herd appears.... in the middle of the fucking desert.

The dogs rush the herd hoping to decimate the forces of walkerism. 2 dogs against 50 walkers. Guess who won?

Anyways, Whats-his-nuts (Nick) decided to watch and wait on top of the van.... That's when the walkers turn on him. They start shambling towards the van, slowly. Nick had plenty of time to flee into the desert but decided to wait for the Walkers to surround him. Lucky for him, gunshots, out of NOWHERE, drew them away.... So, as nick was hungry, he decided to eat rancid, raw, infected dog meat and pin down a crawler walker and takes its bloody belt, which he used as a tourniquet for his dog bite... He gave the walker blood and bacteria a clear route to his bloodstream.... Then, Nick did what any reasonable guy would do.

He smeared himself in blood and joined the herd by going in the direct center of it and readied himself for battle against guys with guns... Fucking moron! Eventually, those psychopaths from earlier appeared and fell at the hands of the walkers and Nick collapsed after the (not so epic) battle and woke up drenched in rain and, miraculously, clean and almost well groomed and went into an abandoned city, where he decided to hole up in a house, drink some water, and patch his infected wounds with duct tape.

It ends with a group of heavily armed Mexicans taking him to their settlement and patching him up with a zoom-out shot of the town..... What the fuck. This was the ONLY GOOD PART of the damn episode.

I am an avid and die-hard fan of The Walking Dead, i've seen all the episodes since the very beginning. I've waited patiently for each season to begin... I even watched Fear The Walking Dead since the very beginning and liked it. Not as much as The Walking Dead, but still... Hell, I don't even get where they are taking the story in Fear yet.. But I like it regardless.... But this episode? The one I waited 4-8 months for?

This episode truly disgusted me.

2/10, would not watch again.

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