My very own Jokes Collection 1 (only half of it). Read if you are interested or want to laugh! :D (I am really sure you will laugh! XD) · 11:46am Aug 5th, 2012
Ok... Because of my previous blog post I was kinda frustrated. So I wanted to share you my very own Jokes Collection 1!
This collection contains 5 jokes. It is actually 10 but I wasn't sure if it will be enjoyable. I will upload the other half if you all want to.
Oh and by the way, It might be rated as R... for weird references... but it doesn't include Gore... or Sex.... Enjoy!
Joke 1:
A naked woman was entering a taxi...
The taxi driver was looking at the woman.
The woman asked: Why are you looking at me? Haven't you seen a naked woman before?
Taxi driver replied: I did see a naked woman before... it is just that... show me your hands...
Woman showed her hands to the driver...
Taxi driver asked: Where is your money?
Explanation:
The woman was naked so she has no pockets... and of course she wasn't holding it...
Joke 2:
There was an accident in a street.
There were 2 people lying on the ground. One of them was dead. His head was gone. And the other had lost his hand. Crying...
A random stranger was walking. He looked at the guy who lost his hand.
Stranger said: Why are you crying? Look at that person. He lost his head and he is not crying.
Explanation:
Of course you don't need any explanation for this one. Do you?
Joke 3:
A man came to a local goat store/shop.
There were 1 red and 1 black goat.
Buyer: How much milk does these goats give?
Seller: The red goat?
Buyer: The black goat. Is the red goat any different?
Seller: Well, the red gives 2 liters of milk.
Buyer: And the black goat?
Seller: Same as the red goat.
Buyer: Then why did you ask?
Seller: Well, black goat is mine.
Buyer: Then whose is the red goat?
Seller: It is my goat too.
Explanation:
Well, the seller wasn't supposed to be asking "which?" if they are both the same. The seller frustrates the Buyer so badly.
Joke 4:
A boy and his dad were in their home.
Boy: Dad! I just killed 3 male and 2 female flies!
Dad: How do you know it?
Boy: Well, 3 flies were sitting on a bottle of beer. And 2 were sitting on the mirror.
Explanation:
The boy just judged those flies' gender according to where they have been sitting on.
Joke 5:
A boy and a dad were sitting next to each other.
Boy: Dad why does the moon look so smaller than elephant but it is considered to be bigger than an elephant?
Dad: Well, damn it.
Boy: Why does cheese have holes?
Dad: Well, damn it.
Boy: Dad who should I ask these questions? Excluding you?
Dad: Well, I am your dad and I am the only reliable person to explain everything to you.
Boy: Why are pyramids shaped as triangle?
Dad: Well, damn it.
Explanation:
Of course, he isn't explaining it to his son so that just about covers everything.
I hope you enjoyed these jokes. These aren't the best... But I don't know which is best since I have many collections.
Let me know if you want the other half. Please? :D
Side note,
I just found the one and only funny or stupid fiction that is tagged as "Dark" but somewhat HILARIOUSLY FUNNY AND SO WRONG! At least, from what I know of.
I find this fiction really hilarious and funny due to his lack of writing fiction skills. But it is not an offense to anyone. Especially to the author.
After I read this I couldn't stop laughing. It was really funny. I was rolling on the floor laughing. (ROFL)
WARNING: By clicking on the link below... You are the one who clicked on it and you will carry out the responsibilities of many weird and useless things. And if you are weak-hearted or takes small things too seriously like taking a small simple joke to be heartbreaking DO NOT READ! because it will have Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash... well......g-gone....
So, if you still want to read a bad fiction and criticize or laugh at it. Here is the link: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/33312/Jail
That fiction's whole story can still be read by looking at the chapter titles too.
The second one is hilarious. The others are iffy.
280205
I'll be sure to put the best later. Sorry about that. I just took it randomly. >_<
what do you what for me?
it ok i am going to rewright it i am go to use google drive for my spelling but for my proof-reading i got no one will help me out ok.
381442
Umm... I have to say that you need to improvise...
I can proof-read that. But if I proof-read it. It will become my story rather than yours. Because you made lots of mistakes. And I mean a lot.
381527 i know that ok but can you help me out now plaese.
{Lee is a pokemon trainer with no mom and no dad in
his live is sad one but night Luna came to him in a dream
and give a chosen his world or Equestria what will he
chosen? This is where the story begins}
One day Luna was doing some research on other
dimensions wind one get to her this world had one
human that got to her he had on a brown shorts on with
a white t-shirt on with two blue gloves on and two red and
blue shoes on with his pokemon team on him. Lee had
enter a pokemon tournament where the price was about
5,0000 pokedolls to the winner of the tournament his team
is a Swampert Staraptor Espeon Aggron Krookodile and a
legendary dragon pokemon Kyurem he was now as the
one hit guy in the pokemon world. Back in Equestria
Luna had see the human was not happy and what to know
why he was not happy but she had to what into he was a
sleep at night so she watch him in the pokemon
tournament. Lee was in the last round of the tournament
it was a full 6 on 6 pokemon match lee had out his
legendary dragon out Lee said Kyurem use dragon claw
and end this match now and it did the other pokemon was
a Flygon and Lee win the pokemon tournament and he
told his pokemon thankyou for battle real hard for me
ok. Later that night after the pokemon tournament Lee
had wind home to his treehome in Equestria Luna had see
his home it had one thing in it was a sleep bag in it and he
cry because he was sad and along. Luna see this and
she had seen and she what to know about this one
and then she wind into the dream world and she said hi
are you Lee and why are you sad? Wind Lee heard this
and said what are and what are you and where are you
then she said my name is Princess Luna i am Alicorn
pony and i am in Equestria i am talking to you in your
dreams Lee and what i see why are you sad? Lee said
i don,t know my mom and dad because they left me in the
hospital wind i was born and that is the story that is why i
am sad and alone in my life Luna. Luna said Lee i give
give you a chosen your world or Equestria Lee then Lee
said how do i know you are not lining to me Luna then
Luna use she magic in the dream world then Lee said
i chosen this Equestria you are talking about but how do
i get there Luna? Luna said i will use a magic spell and i
came to you Lee in the morning ok Lee and what pony
do what to love here Lee they or earth ponies a unicorn
ponies or a pegasus ponies but not Alicorn ponies ok.
{wright notes if you like this please tell me more to come
in Pokemon and Ponies}
384908
I am sorry, but I do not want to proof-read it. I have to point out flaws in the storyline as well. I do not know much about Pokemon. But I will try.
1. Why and how was Luna able to do a research alone?
2. Luna can't do that. She doesn't have such god-like powers like some of the OC "Mary Sue" characters.
And many more. You need to improve your English language first. Then read a lot of some good stories and then start writing.
If you keep trying now. You will be just wasting your time. (No offense)
And I am busy proof-reading some other stories and I am busy writing my own story's chapter 2 as well.
385241 ok fine thank you for your time
385252
You are welcome!
And I have to say that even though your English language is bad. You are polite whatsoever. And that means you are a lot better than that weird arrogant "FelixDawn".
I have to say that our fandom will always welcome you!
Wish you luck in writing!
385260 thank you