Apr
17th
2015
Who reads this crap anyways? · 7:38pm Apr 17th, 2015
My prayers feel blocked. My happiness choked. If my throat isn't dry and clogged with mucus, then I'm constantly having to pee. My improvised music all sounds the same. My head is empty yet my mind is a hurricane. Food is bland. The sound of people annoys me. Months of physical therapy haven't done anything for my neck. I keep trying to tell myself, It's okay. A few more weeks. It'll be over and I'll be out of school. But really, will it? Every time they say it will only get better, it doesn't. I've gone through 3 psychiatrists. All I am impressed with is the idea that everything making me sad is my fault, my doing, or my bad attitude. Why can't I have better problems? How am I going to avoid killing myself in college?
I cannot describe my thoughts after reading that, but If I were you, do something spontaneous hobby wise. Do something completely different that's out of your normal routine. There is something more behind life and you should find it just for the sake of curiosity. Keep in mind that you're not the only one who is constantly isolated in thoughts. Just so you know that there are people here to discuss things with you as what I'm doing right now. If you find yourself struggling with a problem, try to work it out in smaller sections. It doesn't really have to be in a specific order and do what you feel comfortable with. If you find the problem to difficult to sort it out, work on the next one or comeback to it later.