Thirty Minute Pony Stories Prompt #4 - 'Ex Luna Risus' · 2:02pm Jun 4th, 2012
So, number 4. I wasn't originally going to follow this prompt, which was:
Princess Luna takes Pinkie Pie on an “outing” to thank her for something.
However, about half an hour after the prompt went up I got a small brainwave and decided to go ahead and submit one anyway. In particular I saw it as a good chance to practice my Pinkie, as Dreec had mentioned (and I agree) that she didn't sound too like herself in submission #3 (though I would argue that she wasn't necessarily out of character).
Anyway, here it is.
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Princess Luna looked around her, an expression of incredulity and shock rapidly being replaced by what was worrying like pure rage.
“Well y’see Princess, I thought about what could make you feel more at home? I mean you weren’t feeling very welcome in Ponyville and it’s been a really really reallyreallyreally long time since you’d been anywhere but the Moon so I had the bestest idea to do the place up to look like the M –“
The second speaker trailed off as she realised that her explanation was, bizarrely, not having the desired effect.
“Ummm … so you don’t like it?” ventured Pinkie Pie, baker extraordinaire.
The mare in front of her calmed visibly. “No. No, I don’t like it.”
Pinkie leaned forward; she’d heard this before.
“I LOATHE IT!”
“Oopsie!” Pinkie exclaimed, dropping behind Sugarcube Corner’s trade counter to avoid the crushing effects of the Royal Canterlot Voice in full force and fury. When the crullers stopped vibrating, the pink pony slowly raised her head above the makeshift parapet only to come face to face with what could only be described as ‘not a happy pony’.
“Pinkamena Diane Pie.” That was not a good sign. Still, the best way to spread happiness was to be happy, right?
“Yes Princess?”
“Do you have any idea what it was like for us on the Moon? The loneliness, the despair?“
“Well of course not silly, I’ve never been there!”
Uh-oh. Baaaaaaad move, Pinkie. Sure, Luna was smiling now, but it was the kind of smile that made her think less of parties and giggles and more of crazy unicorn librarians.
“Perhaps,” Luna grated out, her horn glowing with an aura that swiftly grew to encompass both ponies, “I should thank you for this by letting you find out.”
And with a thunderclap of displaced air, they were gone.
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There might have been an equivalent sound at their destination, but given the paucity of atmosphere to carry it, Pinkie couldn’t tell.
Luna looked around at the uneven, powdery surface of the Mare Equester, counting very carefully in her head. During her enforced sojourn here she had calculated that a normal pony could probably survive for half a minute before beginning to suffer any ill effects from the exposure. As soon as Pinkie started to falter, she’d teleport them back. After all, this was meant to be an object lesson, not a death sent –
Pinkie’s head appeared in her peripheral vision, looking around with huge blue eyes at her surroundings. Luna blinked once, twice. Summoning her magic, she cast a simple spell that would allow her to hear and be heard despite the lack of air to carry her words.
“Pinkamena?” Eleven, twelve …
“Wheeeee, this is fun!”
“Is that a goldfish bowl on your head?”
“Uh-huh!”
“And … the goldfish inside it?”
“Oh, this is Sticky! Say hi Sticky, you’re addressing royalty!”
The fish continued its lazy orbit past Pinkie’s left ear, swimming through what appeared to Luna to be an empty, upturned bowl. Twenty-two …
Around about then, Pinkie discovered that the law of gravity that she so cordially detested back on Equestria had even less hold on her here. With a whoop of delight she bounded off into the distance, legs flailing and giggles of unbridled joy spilling over the spell-link. Forty-one – wait …
Luna watched her go with an expression of incredulity and shock rapidly being replaced by the tiniest of smiles, before bounding off after her guest.
Kyronea the prompter evaluated the story thusly:
Wow, you took that thanking her bit completely differently than I had thought one might. In truth I’d meant it as a shipping prompt, but you expertly turned it around and into something quite a bit more hilarious. I almost fell out of my chair when I read of Luna banishing Pinkie to the moon, albeit for only a short period of time. Strange how Pinkie then managed to survive despite the lack of oxygen, the temperature, etc, but that’s Pinkie Pie for you, I suppose. Nicely done.
For those wondering about the title - Apollo 13's mission motto was 'Ex luna scientia' meaning 'knowledge from the Moon'. 'Ex luna risus' is, very roughly, 'laughter from the Moon'.
You had to call me out on that huh?
OK, finished.
I like that one a lot more actually. It's not hard to picture Luna's face in that situation on the moon.
154105
Thanks, I'm glad to hear that! You were right, mind you. The dialogue was more suited to Rarity than to Pinkie in #3.
Starfall, why you no write Chrysalis?
156377
That wasn't the prompt, dingbat. Why you gotta make me buck you, baby?
157016
I burned your copy of Composure by accident. I meant to shred it but I put too much paper in the shredder and it caught fire, so technically it really was an accident.
157112
I will love you to death, you reprobate.
157118
That's stupid.
You're stupid.
157152
It is with great pleasure that I verily say unto thee: no u.
157156
My mum says I can be as smart as I wanna be.
157206
Your mom says a lot of things.
157257
That's true.