Come One, Come All! A Royal Announcement! · 12:43am May 30th, 2014
Everyone seated well? Everyone comfortable?
Too bad!
I now welcome: Princess Celestia!
*cheering ensues*
"Hello, my faithful followers- no, subjec-... Crede? Is followers good, or subjects? Either way it feels like I'm leading a cul-"
We'll be right back with these messages!
Messages. More messages. Good? Good.
Welcome back! Everyone feeling alright?
Well you shouldn't be! That's what you're here for.
I now welcome: Princess Celestia!
"Hello, my... ugh, I don't like addressing to them as if I own the-"
MESSAGES.
"Hello, faithful followers. I would like to announce that for an undetermined amount of time, I will personally be taking any and all suggestions that you have on one topic and one topic only. Feel free to ask me about this topic and suggest different approaches to the topic.
"The topic in question is: Suicide!"
*Cheery intro music starts*
"I already have on my list: Severe poisoning, Jumping from a mountaintop, hanging, drowning and an acid bath. Or an acid hot-tub. Question is, which acid, or which mix of acids?"
Starting today, you yourself can submit different methods of suicide! Best part is? You won't truly be harming anyone! Princess Celestia is an immortal being, no matter what happens to her, she'll gather herself together and tell us what it felt like and how effective it was.
*DISCLAIMER: DO NOT ATTEMPT ANYTHING SUGGESTED OR EVEN HINTED AT. SUICIDE IS A SERIOUS PROBLEM AND NONE OF THESE ACTS SHOULD BE COPIED OR REMADE ON ANYONE ELSE OR YOURSELF.*
Enjoy yourselves. - Projected "Disembodied" Voice.
(I'm fine, just figured this would be a neat thing to write about.)
((Also, any new followers, I'm sorry this was the first blog from me you've seen.))
(((Also, this is going to be a mature-rated story if I get enough people suggesting different things.)))
Hammering rusty nails into the most sensitive parts of the body, then a finisher with hammering a dull, rusty nail into the jugular vein (Or carotid artery). Celestia gets pain.