• Member Since 28th Jul, 2012
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I am a Scotsman who writes stories, not all of which are of the self-insert variety; I also have a Let's Play channel. :twilightsmile:

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Q&A Round Nine - The Answers! · 5:06pm Dec 4th, 2013

No intro this time, so let's do this!


Is it true that, due to Geo's mass, Equestria it about to go into gravitational collapse? :twilightoops:

Yes, it is. I suggest taking shelter... oh wait, you can't.

Equestria is doomed, and so are you.


1 - To Ace from A Season Of Terror

First and foremost. Ace...why are you being such a prick?

Ace: "Ever heard the expression, 'Don't judge a man until you walked a mile in his shoes?' You have no idea what I've been through! Everything I've done to prove myself has always been brought into question! I'm not being a prick, you just don't understand what's happened to me! None of you do!"

2. To Zanya from Of Horses and Whorses

Don't you ever get bored of carrying your master around? Wouldn't you just like to lie down somewhere and chew on grass?

Zayna: "How can you even ask me that?! I will never get bored of carrying my master around! I'll have you know that I actually enjoy it. You forget, greatodyer, that I am just an animal and that you humans are the dominant species in our world... 'dominant' being the key word, if you catch my drift."


3. To Luna from...well, any story.

I heard there's this human in another dimension who admires your flank so much. What do you make of this? :trollestia:

Luna: "I'm flattered, but—"

Dusk Wind: "Tell him to go fuck himself! This flank is mine to worship and mine alone, so there's not a damn thing he can do about it!"

Luna: "... what he said."

4. To Twilight from Twilight Tries Irn Bru.

Would you try Irn Bru again? You turned...strange last time and scared the living crap out of Spike. To torment him further...wanna do it again? *hands Irn Bru*

Twilight: "I couldn't possibly do that, not after what happened the last time! Poor Spike was so traumatised, it took several weeks of counselling just to stop the nightmares he was having about 'being turned into mince and tatties'!"

*Spike comes in*

Spike: "Sorry, Twi, but I spilled ink all over your latest letter to Princess Celestia. Could you dictate it again?"

Twilight: "... give me that bottle." *glug glug glug* "Haud still, you wee bawbag, I'm gonnae hammer fuck oot ye!"



5. To Geo.

Here's a hammer. It is inscribed with F.S. You know who to bash.

Geo: "F.S. F.S.... Wait, Fluttershy?! YOU SICK FUCK." *throws hammer to one side*

If I read their PM correctly, then this user wants to remain anonymous

1) Dear John: If you hadn't met Applejack, who would you have chosen next?

John: "I probably wouldn't have met anypony else, to be honest. AJ is definitely the one for me so it's either her or nothing!"

Applejack: "Aww shucks, sugarcube, that's mighty sweet of ya."

John: "Then again, her cousin Fiddlesticks is quite hot..." *gets bucked in the balls*

2) Dear Twilight: How do you "relieve" yourself after Princess work?

Twilight: "I... I use the restroom, like everypony else does?"

Geo: "I think he means that in a sexual way."

Twilight: "Oh, right... then my original answer still stands."

To Humans: You lost the game

John: "Fuck."

Geo: "Shit."

Ace: "I never lose! Just ask these two!" *indicates John and Geo*

What walks on four legs in the morning, two at noon, and three in the evening (hint: it's not a human)

*checks Google* It is a human, actually. :ajsmug:

To Everyone: You are manualy breathing
You cannot find a comfortable spot in your mouth for your tongue
You can no longer smell
You are aware of any clothing you are wearing

Everyone: "... wut."

John 117

To Fluttershy!

I am not the John that you know, I am an augmentanted Spartan super soldier from the future who fights for the survival of the human race. I just want you to know that I love you and if you ever want to see what it like to be with a human you can come find me! I can protect you through pretty much anything from alien hordes to a race long thought dead! Also, I find you incredibly adorable when you work with your animals!

-John 117

Fluttershy: "Super soldier? Survival of the human race? Alien hordes? Ancient races long thought dead? Um... that's all a bit scary, if you don't mind me saying. I won't come to find you... but you are more than welcome to come and find me. M-maybe we can work with the animals together? J-just don't bring any aliens with you, please."

Haywick: "And I can recommend a good psychiatric doctor, because you certainly sound like you need one."

Lord Sandwich

You wake up one morning and your favorite pony is sitting on your bed, waiting for you, because she wants to spend the day with you. As soon as you wake up, you also receive a phone call from a lottery company saying that you won the lottery for $500,000,000 (sorry, I don't know what the exchange rate for your country is, but half a billion USD is a lot of money). They tell you that this is the last day and hour to collect the money. If you leave right away and move very quickly, you can make it to the office to collect your prize. But when you get back, your favorite pony will be gone, and will never return. Neither will any other pony. If you stay with the pony, you won't be able to collect the money, but she's willing to do anything with you, for you, or two you, for the entire day.

My first question is this: what do?

I'd take the pony over £3,060,535,000 any day. Because fuck getting to Edinburgh or London or wherever the National Lottery office is located in an hour!

And a second question: your favorite pony is pregnant. She is then milked. You could make it into cheese, ice cream, chocolate, or any other milk product you can think of. Or you could drink it by itself. What, if anything, would you do with the milk?

First of all: please accept this award for 'Asking Geo The Weirdest Question Ever'.

Secondly: I'd probably drink it. I like milk, and as long as Twilight was okay with it I'd drink as much of it as I could.


Over the course of the series, I've wondered about how Geo and Twi did... y'know despite the height difference. Prior to Twi's ascension, she was able to nuzzle his leg, so it made me think that she was as big as a puppy.

Can you tell me how tall Geo is compared to Twi pre-ascension and post-ascension? Oh, and I also wanna know how old they are.

Ah yes. This has been an inconsistency I've been meaning to address for a while now. Since Geo is pretty much me, his height is 6 foot, 4 inches (193.04 centimetres). My headcanon dictates that ponies are about four feet tall, while alicorns are five feet.

As for their ages: Geo is 26 while Twilight is 24.


To doctor Ace from an anonymous per…I mean ponies, along side a map with coordinates to some place on Equestria

'Dear Doctor Ace, in this envelop you will find a clip, a rubber band and a straw, please save our town from our evil dragon lord Chromatus,

Atte: A desperate prisoner'

inside the enveloped are the materials.

Doctor Robo: "Ace isn't here right now for it is only I, Doctor Robo! I will save your town from this dragon... but you had better be ready to swap one overlord for another!" *evil laughter*

To prince Geo from an human hiding.

"Dear prince Geo, I have being wondering is your wife and Cadence immortals? And if so, are you and Armor interest in taking a test similar to the alicorn blessing in order to become immortals as well, to stay with them, but at the cost of gaining super powers?"

P.S: don't bother asking Discord to tell who I'm or where I'm, I won him a bet and he can't tell a word to you'

Geo: "I know for a fact that Twilight isn't immortal. Celestia has already told her that she won't allow her to go through the pain of outliving all her friends. As for Cadence... I don't think so, but I hardly ever see her as it is, so I can't really answer for her."

That's all for now. Thanks to Crimson Star for answering greatodyer's question to Ace. I answered Lightingaces question, so apologies if it sucks.

This was fun! We should do this again in January.

Until the next time, everyone!

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Comments ( 3 )

I couldn't think of any questions in time.

I don't even DESERVE to ask Rainbow "down in the dumps" Dash a question anyway!

Finally! Thank you so much for answering that question.

Twilight: "... give me that bottle." *glug glug glug* "Haud still, you wee bawbag, I'm gonnae hammer fuck oot ye!"

I laughed too hard at this

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