MFT3K: Far From Home (By Killsy) Chapter One · 7:14pm Nov 21st, 2013
As the camera fades in, Meesterbob, Sombra, and Discord are sitting around a table, playing cards.
MB: Oh hey, viewers! Welcome to the MoL, where we are all playing a little game for a little prize. Sombra, bets to you.
S: Do you have any threes?
MB: Sombra, for the last time, this is not Go-Fish. This is poker. We are playing to see who gets out of fic-reading this week. Don't you want that?
D: Of course I have a three! Here you go, Sombra. Get another one and I think you'll have a bingo!
MB: Discord, you are not helping.
S: Hmm... so does this mean I get a Yahtzee?
MB: *facepalm* Not only did the Princess shoot me to the moon, but she stuck me here with you two.
D: I know! I never thought she had that level of chaos in her. Perhaps she can be taught yet.
S: I miss my stairs. *sniff sniff*
MB: Aw, Sombra, don't cry. All of us miss things at home. I miss my computer, and Luna misses the view of the moon, and Discord...
Looks over at Discord, who is making a salad from moon-rocks and golf clubs
MB: I dunno. Maybe he misses his chocolate rain?
The screen splits, to show both the Exiles and Princess Celestia
PC: How touching, you guys. Almost makes me want to bring you back. Almost.
MB: Cut to the chase, Princess. What do we have to trudge through today?
PC: So touchy. *tsk tsk*
MB: *rolls eyes*
PC: Anyway, since you are obviously dying to know, I'll tell you that your fic for the day is a little ditty called "Far from Home" by a user named Killsy. It's a heart-wrenching, sad story that details Rainbow Dash's life if she didn't have a Cutie Mark.
MB: How original. [/sarcasm]
PC: I thought I'd also let you know this story currently has 10 likes... and zero dislikes on FIMfiction.
D: Oh, one of those oscar-winning cry-me-a-river fics! I never get tired of ripping them to shreds.
MB: Who knows, maybe the story is a good one for once.
PC: We'll, you're sure to find out. I'm sending the story now. Good luck. *disconnects*
MB: We might have got something of good quality this time around, guys.
S: Maybe it even has stairs in it.
MB: Maybe, Sombra. Mayb-
AUOOOOGA!
MB: OOOOH, WE GOT STORYSIGN! Positions everypony! Here comes the Title Page!
---
Far From Home
By Killsy
S: I prefer Maimsy's stories myself.
MB: Or how about Beatsy's?
Do you ever get the feeling that you just don't belong, no matter where you are, or what you're doing?
MB: Well, I am stuck on the moon, reading bad fanfiction...
Rainbow Dash solemnly reflected on this thought as she stared out from the Everfree Forest. To be honest,
D: Oh, so you were lying before this?
she had felt out of place most of her life, and it kept coming hack to haunt her.
S: Coming... HACK?
D: The Ghost of out-of-placeness obviously enjoys Cupcakes.
She sighed, it always seemed to really hit her when she was least guarded for it.
MB: Because living with emotions is like boxing. You gotta keep your guard up, or BAM! Right in the liver.
She continued on through the forest, head down, reflecting on why she felt this way, until the dulcet tones of Zecora brought her back to reality.
MB: A quick Google search for "dulcet" reveals:
She couldn't make out the word, but the sound of her voice reminded her of why she was in the Everfree forest in the first place.
D: "I see that you, come here to smoke/My own special Poison Joke."
She was supposed to be getting Amethyst
ALL: Gesundheit.
to help Zecora in her newest remedy, even though Zecora was still frustratingly keeping what it would be a secret. Oh well, nothing she could do about it.
Rainbow Dash found some of the elusive purple flower,
MB: Twidash foreshadowing. I'm calling it.
and after taking a mouthful of it,
traveled back towards Zecora's hut. She went about placing it in the right place in the right barrel, muttering under her breath about how Zecora had to be so neat the whole time. It was just... unnatural.
S: "My OCD is not really that bad/It's just the dust. It makes me mad.
Excused from anymore wild plant chases, Rainbow Dash decided to take a walk in the forest to clear her mind. She sighed contentedly and stretched her wings.
A calm walk through the woods was always a good way to clear her mind.
MB: Being chased through the woods by a rabid manticore, on the other hand...
She walked calmly past the owl hooting, and the distant Timberwolves howling, sounds that quite often paralyzed most ponies with fear. Pfft, wimps.
MB: 
If you had a little knowledge, maybe a little common sense (something most ponies seemed to lack) and a little bravery, you could navigate this forest, no problem. Seems most ponies Rainbow Dash knew lacked all of these things though. What a waste.
D: Hey, no one told me this was a Rainbow Factory tie-in!
MB: YOU ARE ALL WORTHLESS!
She decided to test her wings and go for a little flight. Nothing rigorous, just a smooth little fly through the canopy.
MB: 
D: Yeah, good luck with that.
She took off with a running jump, enjoying how the number of branches and lack of light added a good bit of challenge to the game.
MB: DAGNIABIT!
S: What?
MB: I just lost The Game.
She landed on her hooves and ran blindly through the trees, letting off a little happy laugh, barely avoiding the trunks. A upturned root decided to end her fun though, and as she face-planted,
MB: 
she thought the Everfree forest might not be the best place for a midnight joyride. She slowed down and took a good look at herself, to see how badly she had messed herself up.
Rainbow Dash was a very peculiar pony. For one, she was a rainbow pegasus. Her mane, which was mostly tied up into a ponytail
D: Should that be "human-tail"?
MB: I don't think it works like that.
at the moment, minus the few rebel strands that had gotten out, had all the colors of the rainbow.
MB: And yours can too, when you use Skittles-brand hair dye!
Second off, she was one of the only ponies brave enough to spend time with Zecora.
But the most fascinating thing about her?
Rainbow Dash was a fully-grown blank flank.
MB:
---
MB: Well, that was Chapter One everyone. How did you feel about it so far?
D: It was...
S: Well...
D: It was kinda...
S: Short.
D: But that's the beauty! It was short, so we don't have to read it for much longer.
MB: But, I mean, quality over quantity here, right?
S: Let's see. I have taken the time to chart out exactly what actually happened in that chapter for all of you.
MB: Oh?
S: Yes. We'll see just what the 600-and some change-words have done for the story.
D: Let's do it.
S: Okay. Ahem. "Rainbow Dash angst. Rainbow Dash grabs purple flower. Rainbow Dash angst. Rainbow dash flies. Rainbow Dash fails. Rainbow Dash ponytail. Rainbow Dash blank-flank. Curtain!"
ALL: ...
D: Actually, that's a pretty good summary.
MB: We read 630 words to get that?
D: And we have 7 more chapters to go?
S: Yup.
MB: Ugh. It's going to be a long night.
---
(Hey guys. Meesterbob here. If you have a second, could you run over to Killsy's story and take a look at the rest of it? Despite how I sound in the MST, it's actually pretty good. It certainly needs more love.
Remember, this isn't a story, so I cannot get likes or faves on it. If you thought it was funny, could you do me a favor and send your friends here? Otherwise, my work will go unnoticed.
Thanks!)
Moooooo
1526931 If you think of anything specific I can improve, just say the word.
1526933 Don't know really
Loved the human-tail though 
aaand I lost the game >.<
This though... Im not sure if this is a Zecora rhyme, I'm guessing it is, but personally I just think it might sound better is it'd be "My OCD is not really that bad/ It is just the dust that makes me mad."
Personal opinion, thats all
Still,
to you and can you pleeeaaase do more 
Two mustaches and a eeyup out of five mustaches.
/
I feel there is a lot more you can do to make this blogs more entertaining MB.
Still nice job.
~Leonzilla
1526968 Specicics, man! LIKE WHAT?
1527289 no specifics because you would need to redo the entire thing in order to significantly improve it; however you did make me laugh hard at some points.
LIke:
weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/face-plant.jpg
and
However I rated it to let you know how far I feel it is from being top notch comedy.
Do note that I didn't get all the jokes. Whether because I'm an ignorant or because you need more than plain randomness to get a laugh.
Either way, I would focus on quality over quantity of jokes if I were in your place.(the amount of jokes were a little distracting, and made it kind of hard to focus on the advertized story).
I will make sure to look at the next one.
good luck,
~Leonzilla
idk wtf omg happened to this blog.
But it was awesome.
I have no idea what this is, but I love it.
1526931
Doesn't feel right, how?
1548194 I have nooo idea anymore
Still awesome though 
1549705
Well if you think of anything, I'd love to hear it. And thanks!
MOAR!
MOAR!