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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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8109968 oh fun. And thanks!
Loved this chapter. It was amusing to see Sweetie Belle do her rendition of Hush Now, Quiet Now and the fact that Bronze, RD, Barb, and AJ journeyed into the DD's tunnels to save Rarity was awesome. Special highlights include Barb going feral and using blue flames and Bronze taking charge and making a strategy to defend the group against Diamond Dogs. Rarity acting as a weak mare while inwardly thinking of ways to escape was a nice way to show her inner strenght. Lastly, a I loved the interaction between Fluttershy and Dusk as the former has become comfortable enough to make advances on Dusk Shine by kissing/nibbling his mark. Though it makes me wonder if Fluttershy has always been this amorous around Rarity? Anyway, thanks for the chapter. It was worth the wait.
Here's hoping you keep the google docs with all my old positive comments that I've long since forgotten.
8109990
Thanks! Love your comments!
A fantastic scene, I can't wait for her next performance.
Heroes gotta do what a heroes gotta do!
Dragons are greedy.
I gotta establish her competency to make whats to come believable.
This has been a long time coming!
There are things coming that will explain that coming haha. And thank you for still reading/commenting\!
8111178 I promise I try to keep all the best comments on the gdocs, but I do admit that sometimes I get carried away while clearing the notes. Regardless your support has always been deeply appreciated!
8114722 First, thank you for reading!
That explanation that sprang to my mind before they introduced the Smooze in the new seasons just made so much sense. Once in history of Equestria, the Smooze was made and was a nightmare for the ponies. Surely if Luna and Celestia were around at the time, they would have helped stop it. And if they'd figured that out, why not re-purpose it into something to test future generations.
I love figuring out how to expand the ideas the show offers into full stories.
You got it right. Dusk/twilight get way too worked up about stuff. It's their greatest failure in their early career.
I'm just glad it come through in any condition at all. I still need to return to the old chapters to improve the writing.
A lot is going on. There will be hints, and if you guess it before it's revealed, revel in it but don't spoil it for others.
That story is coming one day but it will take some time before it is complete, sadly. I hope you keep enjoying what you read and keep commenting, I love to talk over ideas and hint at plot points to come.
Fight on! I can't wait!
8115313
Establishing and reinforcing this is important to me. Trying to show they have spend a long time together and are very close, but that she isn't super jealous of his other relationships.
I am very lucky to have a good team of editors that assist with making something intelligible out of my mangled scraps. But thanks!
Huzzah!
Hi Psi-new. I'm finally in line with your story.
I must admit I was cold sweat when Rarity was kidnapped by diamond dogs. But now she pretends to look weak, but within itself and a strong woman who already plans her plans to escape. I must say I enjoyed the relationship between Dusk and Barb.
I can not wait for the next update!
8133277 thats fantastic to hear! Glad you're still enjoying it. I've already nade progress on the next part and hopefully I'll have something to show you soon
8138917
Can you give a direct example of what you mean?
8138917 Hey! First, thanks for reading! You're right about the early chapters, I've started working on them in google docs to improve the grammer and writing in a number of places.
In your example I think i get what your intent is, but I still want to ask: "Thanks no." Can be quite akward in sine situations, where as "no, thanks." Can be a polite form of declining an offer. Can you make any more specific of a suggestion?
Reguardless, thanks for your time! Hopefully you'll read on, as I wrote the first few chapters with little to no editing assistance origionally. You should see the improvements in the next few chapters as I startsd getting help from proofreaders and editors.
8150110 Thats a fun breakdown of details abd concepts. I'd never looked up the dictionary definition if anniversary because I'd just figured it was used properly as the ince a year anual celebration of an event. But then again humanity is pretty bad misusing their own language, just look at the abuse 'literally' gets.
Anyways, this kibd of stufd is why I use the AU tag little differences to add flavor. If you're interested Dash' season one profile is here.
8358865 hey! Yeah, I occasionally still use dialogue from the episodes, but the overall plot is really all I still use, over time less and less direct links will come up, but it'll always be related to the existing shows story in a general sense. Glad you're enjoying it so far!
8359266
Yeah this is going well. A tad confused as to why Rarity is so intent on meeting Blueballs even after romancing Dusk, though.
8365153 Haha. Oh dear, no, Rarity was teasing him, weaving her old fantasy into her new relationship with Dusk. I will have to go over that part again sometime to make it more explicit. I apologize and am glad you are enjoying the story.
8365159
That certainly makes a lot more sense; some edits would definitely help avoid future confusion.
8374839
Yeah, as one of his newer editors, I've kept up on his latest content as it comes out, but I haven't really gone too far back to the older stuff. It's on the backlog of stuff to get done, though.
Edit: By 'newer' stuff, I think I came on around chapter 12 or so.
8381952
Told ya.
8382689
It definitely took me a minute to get used to. I honestly don't mind it either way now.
8382588
I will get you proper answers and replys to your posts after work, but for now, something quick:
1: Twilights Asention. Yes, if you keep reading you will quickly find I am not being very subtle on this as the story continues.
2: Tirek. All of the Tirek. Shining will have a bigger part, but no, he isnt one of the 8 main heros planed to take part in the Final Battle with Tirek.
3: See above. Cant wait to see what you think as you get deeper into Dusks story!
8374791
Interlude 4 Part 1 - 7 Bells fixed to Belle
Interlude 4 Part 2 - 8 Bells fixed into Belle
Chapter 5 Part 2 - 4 Bells
Really slow author edits? Priceless?
Anyways, it appears that that's where my poor spelling of Sweetie Bell's name ends. Now to do the same thing for Apple Bloom vs Applebloom -,-;; I've got a lot of rewrites to do someday.
8374839
impersonation feels wrong, but reguardless, Fixed to make it clear it's Celestia they are both quoting.
8381952
Well thank you!
8382275
Thank you too.
8382689
I understand. Lyra is a minor character and only occasionally comes up. I'm not sure what i'm going to do with future events. Thanks for sloughing through.
Also: Yay, finally feel good enough about the next part to say it's nearly ready for editor review. Just giving it a few final touches before handing it off.
8374850
Glad to have you back! Hopefully you continue to enjoy!
8388419
My pleasure. Your story is grotesquely underrated and I aim to fix that.
8389404
Just... just don't mug any people, alright?
8389694
You don't ask and I won't tell.