Das Leben ist kein Ponyhof

by Staleprate

3. A Hard Fought Bargain

The transport creaked and groaned as the waves pushed it from side to side. Guntram’s loud snores were accentuated by his position against the wall, while his officer took post “guarding” the idols (Guntram had insisted on a proper and complete changing of the guard before he let himself rest).

“Out of all the places I could have been sent… Cloudbury, Griffonstone, even Haukland! It had to be Asterion…” Fleidgling paced back and forth in frustration. “My classmates are having a merry time with all the conveniences of modern life, and I’m relegated to some hostile backwater. Do you believe this, Korporal?”

A long snore was his only response.

“Yes, I’m beginning to think we may never get out of this place. How long have we been going around the islands, anyway?”

Snork.

“Can you imagine all the festivals, all the outings we’re missing out on? All the griffons we could have met?” His frustration gave way to a dangerous curiosity. Fleidgling had to take a moment’s pause. “Yes… the griffons we could have met. Guntram, why were they so quick to ensure we didn’t leave the ship? Were they afraid we would forget to return?”

Fleidgling’s spoken thoughts were interrupted by a sharp knock at the hatchway. Through the porthole on the hatch, he saw the crewgriff the major had spoken to earlier, beckoning him forth. He appeared a little nervous.

“Well, what’s this now…” Fleidgling strode to the hatch, a little cautiously. Once he was close enough, the griffon opened it just a crack.

“Hey, you might want to take a look at this. I got my talons on a message the major entrusted me with after you went in, and whe-ew!” The griffon whistled and wiped his head for exaggerated effect. “It does NOT look good for you.”

“What? What is it?” Fleidgling demanded. Now he was getting anxious. Though he pried at the hatch, the griffon still held it at just a crack.

“Shh, shh. Keep your voice down,” the griffon whispered. His eyes kept switching between Fleidgling and something on the other side of the hatch. “Now, you are paymaster right? That means you’ve got plenty of idols?”

“Well… yes,” Fleidgling whispered back. He could tell what was coming next. As much as the rankers tried, they had never been able to press him to take part in bribery. Until now.

“Uh, yeah, this is going to cost you.”

“...Fine.” Fleidgling quietly went to the sack and withdrew some coins, careful to make absolutely sure Guntram was asleep. “Here’s twenty idols” he grumbled, depositing them into a pouch extended through the hatchway.

The griffon yanked it back through and counted them all immediately, looking back to Fleidgling satisfied. “Alright, listen closely.” He peeked the tip of his beak inside. “On Thebos? Where we’re dropping you off?”

“Yes, yes, what of it?” Fleidgling was giving his full attention to this.

“Things will be going normally there. But then they’re moving you to Prospero and, well…” he trailed off.

“Well?”

The door opened just a little more, and the pouch was extended through again. With a sigh, Fleidgling retrieved 20 more idols.

“Well, they expect the locals will be, eh, emboldened by the recent news. No griffons can be spared. Now look, I can’t stay here all night. I can just give you the parchment itself… for a few idols more. Don’t be so glum. I’m sure you can afford it, Herr paymaster,” he said, complete with a mock salute.

“This is an outrage,” the paymaster whispered with as much ferocity as he could, but he begrudgingly brought the whole bag towards the door nonetheless. “How much is it for our release from confinement,” he gestured towards the sleeping Korporal, “in addition to the full set of orders?”

The crewgriff was staring at the bag giddy like now. “D-d-do I hear, mmm, one thousand idols?”

“One thousand idols!” Fleidgling was dumbstruck. He was demanding a small fortune. This was just going too far now. And Fleidgling was about to say no… until he saw the sleeping Guntram in the corner of his vision.

“Alright, fine then,” he said, his face and tone becoming far more amicable. “One thousand idols is just alright. In fact, if you’ll just slip the orders inside, I’ll let you help yourself to the bag! I trust you’ll be able to count the right amount?” He added a wink to be extra sure the greedy griffon didn’t miss his offer.

That was all Fleidgling needed to say. Fleidgling could tell from the griffon’s shaky movements as he slipped through that it took all the self-inhibition the griffon had to stop himself from bursting in. “H-here. This has the orders regarding you, information for the local commander, and a-anything else you might need to know..”

Fleidgling snatched it from his grip, and walked further back inside, as the griffon took as many idols from the bag as he could at a time.

Fleidgling smiled. He didn’t even need to wait for the griffon to get lost in the coins. “Oh Korporal…” He lightly stroked Guntram’s head with the tip of his wing as he whispered into the Korporal’s ear coverts. “Wake up, Guntram…”

Snerk!

“Hmm, hmm, yes, Herr Hauptgreif?” Guntram was beginning to come to, though he wasn’t fully awake.

“Korporal. Stand up, please.” Fleidgling wasn’t in too much of a hurry. He knew he had plenty of time.

“Mmph... ” Guntram got up and saluted, using his musket for support. “Reporting, Herr Hauptgreif!”

“Korporal, look around. Do you see the idols we’re in charge of?” Fleidgling said, with less concern than he should have had.

Guntram looked around the room, but saw nothing. “No, Herr Hauptgreif. I do not…” Words failed him as he began to comprehend what was going on. “Hey… Herr Hauptgreif, the Idols! They are gone! They are-” The Korporal, now completely awake, spotted the oblivious crewgriff still rummaging through the sack. The pockets of his uniform were bulging with coinage now.

“Aha! A thief! Halt! Stay where you are!” Guntram shouted as he ran towards the culprit with his musket in grip, poised to attack.

Fleidgling watched with knowing amusement as he stood where he was. “Well done, Guntram.” He smiled, mentally praising his own ingenuity.

“What is this?” The griffon shouted, angry that he was being forcefully stopped from claiming any more Idols. “These are mine! Your officer gave them to me, in exchange for information!”

“You dare to accuse Herr Fleidgling of bribery?” His attempts to defend himself only further aggravated the Korporal who stood with raised haunches and tail. “Ach, this is too much! You have gone too far!”

“Oi! Calm down, ask Herr ‘Fledgling’ or ‘Feigling’ or whatever it was, he’ll verify it!” The griffon was backing away into a corner, still dragging the bag with him. He did not want to part.

“I have never spoken to this griffon before,” Fleidgling said with an air of indifference, not even bothering to look.

“Hmph! Theft, accusation of bribery, and blatant disrespect of a superior officer! This cannot go unpunished, I give you one last chance to stand down!” Guntram was closing the distance, gun barrel pointed right at the griffon, who had hit a wall.

“Enough! Damn each of you! Maar guide your souls!” The griffon hissed as he reached for a dagger around his lower body, but Guntram winded in with a solid punch before he could take it out in time, knocking him straight into the wall with a CLANG!

Neither Fleidgling nor Guntram said a word as they watched the griffon slide down the wall, onto the ground. After a few moments of silence, he slumped over, moaning and grasping at his head. Fleidgling exhaled in relief, while Guntram took a moment to take a couple deep breaths, calming down.

“The nerve of some griffons,” was all Guntram said.

“Right… Korporal. See to it that all idols on him are returned to the sack. We’ll have the Kapitän deal with him later.”

“Jawohl, Herr Hauptgreif.”

Satisfied that the incident had been dealt with, Fleidgling opened the scroll the griffon traded him earlier. The orders that were to be delivered to the commanding officer at Thebos.

Fleidgling’s limbs stiffened and his tail dropped low as he read through it. “Oh dear.”

“Civilian uprising in the heartlands, joined by soldiers… mass desertions… nobility fleeing… and they march on the young Kaiser in Griffenheim!” Each problem seemed worse than the last.

Guntram had occupied himself with roughly stuffing idols back into the sack, unable to hear his superior’s broodings over the loud clink of the coins.

But insurrection in the Empire did not seem so worrying as what Fleidgling read next. “By order of Chief of the Emperor’s General Staff, Generaloberst von Vinnin: armies determined to be of too great a distance from Griffenheim are to hold their territories from revolt at all costs, until further notice.”

There was an added addendum by the Cyanolisian General Staff. “Von Cannabia sees it wise that spare troops in the region be sent to garrison the Minotaur islands. The bulls in Cyanolisia have been kept down. There is suspiciously little unified resistance noted, we hope to maintain the situation. Should news of weakness spread to Asterion, the uprising would likely be of an unprecedented scale. It is highly unlikely that we will be able to maintain order in such a situation, troops should be sent to delay Minotaurs as long as possible while mainland garrisons are bolstered.” He read aloud.

The frazzled Fleidgling could not help but pluck at his contour feathers, though he refrained from removing them completely to maintain what dignity he could. “Ach du lieber!”

Guntram finished re-packing the idols, and noticing something amiss with his superior, walked over beside him. “What is the matter Herr Hauptgreif?”

Fleidgling turned to tell Guntram the bad news. “The Heartlands are in mass turmoil, and we’re being sent on a… on a...” he scrambled to find the proper word, and failed. Instead using the first substitute that came to mind. “A suicide assignment!” He splayed his wings in exasperation. “That message left Griffenheim half a month ago. There's no telling how the situation has changed since.”

“Oh... that is indeed terrible,” Guntram said with a downtrodden look as he removed his helmet.

“Terrible? This could be it for us! Do you remember Prospero when we were there just a few weeks ago?” Fleidgling took Guntram by the shoulder and shook him vigorously with a free claw. “We would wake up with bullet holes in our tents! And that was before the situation started deteriorating!”

“Her-r-r Hauptgr-reiff, it is against regulation for…” Guntram didn’t need to finish before Fleidgling let him go.

The paymaster sighed, eyes downcast. “I’m sorry, Guntram, it’s just that.. Ugh. What are we to do?”

The Korporal shrugged. “What can we do?”

“What can we do…?” Fleidgling turned to him with a pained look. “...We’re going to take a walk on deck.”