Why I'm Loud

by RayDawn

The Stressor

Author's Note:

This is something I wanted to write for so long. I really do appreciate all comments and criticism you can lash out. Just be critical, not cruel.

I walk down the street from my apartment, well, my and Tavi's apartment, to Canterlot High School. I cross the street and notice Octavia ahead. I run up to her and tap her shoulder. "Hey Vinyl." Tavi looked at me and immediately her face lit up.

Hey Tavi. I think as I wave to her. I was slightly panting.

"You excited for school today?" Tavi asked me.

Definitely! Today is the day I unleash my sick wubs at Pinkie's after party for our draw at the Friendship Games! I think to myself as I nod.

"It's amazing how we almost beat Crystal Prep!" Tavi had excited eyes, which contrasted her normally calm attitude.

I know, right? It has been so long since we as a school have had such spirit! I nod vigorously and Tavi, as if reading my face for my inner monologue, smiled at me. Tavi knew me so well that she knew what I was generally thinking about, but not specifics. Those, I would write to her.

We walk forward faster, realizing the time and we almost make it to school late, me all the while was blasting my music through my headphones. Tavi was the only person I ever took them off for, because I loved her. Not like love like the ones shared by significant others, but sister love, she is my sister after all. We separate our paths and I walk to my homeroom at Ms. Harshwinny's class. I see Sunset seated already and wave to her as I sit down next to her. "HeyVinyl. How's it hanging?"

It's been okay, but uneventful, so far. Can't wait for the party though. I think as I hold my palm parallel to the floor and do a seesaw action with it.

"Same. Can't wait for the party, too." It has always surprised me to see how much of me people understood. I guess my body language speaks volumes. Me and Sunset shared most classes and after her reformation I began to get to know her better. She helped school become less trivial through the days, but I always managed to hide my ear buds from the teachers so I could listen to my music. I always needed my music. Except when with Tavi.

...

After spacing out and listening to music for what seemed like forever, the final bell rang for the day and I sprang to life. I grabbed my big headphones, placed them on my ears and faintly heard Sunset say. "See you at the party!" I smiled and nodded on the way out. I ran to Sugar Cube Corner as fast as I could and got food into my system quickly. I paid the Cakes and walked out to see Tavi.

"Hey Vinyl. The party is starting soon and I thought you would like to help Pinkie set it up, you being band mates after all." Tavi said with a neutral face. She always got like this when we talked about my being in the Rainbooms. It was like she didn't like, or hate it, it just existed. I raised my eyebrow and pointed at her. "I'll come too."

Awesome! I nodded after I thought this and Tavi sighed in defeat. I let out a smirk.

"Your lucky your my sister..." Tavi looked slightly annoyed, but nonetheless happy.

I know. I smiled even harder as we walked back to the school's gymnasium, or rather, Pinkie's favorite place to throw parties. Upon arrival, we saw Sunset and the rest of the Rainbooms. I waved towards them and they waved back.

"Hey Vinyl! How's it going?" Rainbow Dash practically yelled.

I move my hand in a seesaw action. "Boring day, darling?" Rarity said as she approached me. I nodded to her. "That is disappointing to hear, dear. But we do have a gig. Well, a popularity gig, we won't get paid and it is a generous favour to Pinkie." I shrug.

"You girls didn't have to do that! But thanks for doing it! Vinyl, can you start the party off with your music and then we can continue it as a group?" Pinkie says in almost a heartbeat. I nod and Rainbow Dash reacts.

"I knew we could count on you, Vinyl!" Rainbow was smiling as she placed her arm around the back of my neck. I smile and Octavia finally speaks up.

"I hate to ruin this moment, but we should finish preparations for the party. It's getting late." Octavia said and everyone nodded as we continued working.

...

I was at my booth ready to start the tunes, when Pinkie made the opening announcement. "Hey there Crystal Prep and Canterlot High students! Today we are here to throw a party in our schools getting a draw." Massive amounts of clapping and roaring from the crowd erupted. "Today's music will be provided by DJ PON-3..." Pinkie points to me and I wave at the crowd. "...and the Rainbooms!" More applause. "Hit it!" I start playing my music and the party starts.

I love this feeling. Where I can stand out and speak up with my music, my second language other than motions and writing. I play vigorously and everyone is having a good time dancing. It fills me with the hole I had in my heart when I lost my words. No. When my words were stolen. It makes me feel...hole...I think to myself as I play my music. Halfway through my music a mic is tapped and feedback fills my ears. Making me take off my headphones and placing my fingers in my ears.

It was Principal Celestia. "Sorry! I just want to say a few words. After the events at the Friendship Games, I just want to say that I am very proud to be in this room, with every student here. We all have our own unique voice to share with the world..." I felt tears trickle down my face as I tried, and failed, to tune Principal Celestia out. "...and with those voices we bring our opinions to light..." I can feel myself breaking down as she continued. "I want to thank all of you for lending your voice to the crowd and allowing us to be united!" Celestia was smiling as she said this.

A realization hit me that threatened to break me. We are all united...except me. I will never lend my voice to the crowd because I don't have one. I began to shake and sob without sound and as I stood up and caused a really loud scratching noise to happen. All eyes were on me and I turned around and ran. I could hear Tavi screaming for me and a couple other voices, the Rainbooms, after her. I let out a guttural sound, my form of expressing pain, as I ran.

"Vinyl! Stop!! PLEASE!!!" Tavi screamed, but I was lost in my thoughts.

I'll never belong. I'm an outsider who will never be heard and let in. I stopped after this thought and fell on my left side. I hugged my knees. It's just like that night all those years ago... I think to myself.

I close my eyes and remember the worst day of my life.

Comments

[RBronyReader446]

She always got like this when we talked about my being in the Rainbooms.

I'm confused on what you mean but I think you meant me

[Roberto The Stormtrooper]

A realization hit me that threatened to break me. We are all united...except me. I will never lend my voice to the crowd because I don't have one. I began to shake and sob without sound and as I stood up and caused a really loud scratching noise to happen. All eyes were on me and I turned around and ran. I could hear Tavi screaming for me and a couple other voices, the Rainbooms, after her. I let out a guttural sound, my form of expressing pain, as I ran.

Poor Vinyl feels alone in terms of being unable to speak, the poor dear...

Damn you, insensitive Principal Celestia...