Angry

by Lovinlife

Chapter 4: Angry Fear

The crowd of the festival never dulled down or decreased during the time of party and celebration that overtook Ponyville. Scootaloo was forced to weave her way through the mess of ponies, feeling like she was in a hedge maze. Craziness jumbled all around her, but Scootaloo pressed on through the bodies to reach her goal, not even knowing where Applebloom had even gone.

Scootaloo wanted to kick herself for not following her friend when she had the chance, but maybe the race had been more important to her at the time. How could she be so stupid to think that her career was more important that the friendship she held with one of her best friends? There was no lying to herself this time that she had messed up big time. She wanted to see Rainbow Dash impressed for all the hard work that she had put into the race, and she was.

The booths lined the pathway, and groups of ponies were clustered together. Families stood together, foals holding onto their parents' hands or up on their shoulders to get a better look at the demonstrations they were watching, thus blocking the view of anypony trying to watch behind them.

Scootaloo frantically searched these clusters to no avail. Each time she looked, she was met with only bitter disappointment, which made her think of how stupid she was still. Foalhood habits never change.

The lost pegasus wandered with nowhere to go that she knew of, until a familiar, shrill voice rose up above the hubble of the crowd. "And as you can see here darlings, the fabric is brand new. No wrinkles, no stains, not even a crease on the seams can be seen. Isn't it just lovely?" There was no other pony that voice and accent could belong to except for Sweetie's sister, Rarity. If Sweetie Belle was anything like she had been as a foal, if Rarity was nearby, she was bound to be close. Following Rarity's loud voice, she saw another group of ponies standing out in front of the Charasel Boutique. In the center of attention, probably to her glee, Rarity talked on and on about something to do with fabric. Sounded like cleaning or something like perserving the fabric? Scootaloo wasn't really listening to the details, and didn't really care to hear.

She groaned irritably, frustrated at the major lack of progress she has made in finding her friend. She stomped her foot into the dirt, kicking up a small cloud of dust around her, shouting, "I'll never find Applebloom like this! Never! Never! Never!" She mashed her foot into the ground with every beat with her words, causing more dust to fly up.

"Hey Scootaloo, how did the race go?" A squeaky voice that still sounded older and a whole lot less irritating to listen to than Rarity's asked from behind her. Scootaloo savagely spun around, turning on Sweetie Belle like a wild animal loosed from its cage. The white unicorn jumped back, shreaking a tiny bit from surprise. She collected herself and nervously asked, "Um, Scootaloo... are you okay?"

"NO!" Scootaloo snapped, forcing Sweetie to take a couple of steps away from the pegasus. "Sweetie Belle, where did Applebloom go!?" Her shout could be compared to that of a crazy mare on the run from the guards.

The suddeness of Scootaloo's question blanked Sweetie Belle's mind for a second. She couldn't process the question that was shouted at her. That small amount of fear and shock made her friend just stand there in the open with her mouth agape at the pressed mare. This only irritated Scootaloo even more, and she stomped her hoof, once again, into the dirt. "Come on, Sweetie Belle, this is important!"

This did the trick, as Sweetie blinked once, a bit confused at what just happened, and her fish eyes turned on Scootaloo. "Oh, um, sorry, I don't know what just happened." Scootaloo twirled her hand in front of her, motioning for Sweetie to hurry it up. "Right, I think I saw her with Applejack that way," She pointed behind her. "It looked like they were heading off to Sweet Apple Acres, Applejack was pulling her wagon with them."

The second that Sweetie Belle finished, Scootaloo was off and running in that direction, dodging the ponies left and right who complained at her for disturbing their time of fun. Sweetie Belle was right behind her, just managing to keep up with the faster and more athletic pegusus. "Scootaloo, wait! What's going on, why are you chasing after Applebloom!?"

"No time to stop." Scootaloo kept her eyes foreward, moving her body at the last second to avoid any collistions. "I met up with Bloom and Rainbow wasn't happy, something about her being angry at me or something like that, she didn't say. But, long story short, Applebloom ran off, and I'm trying to catch up to her."

Sweetie Belle bit her lip at the thought of Applebloom saying what she had said last night at the bar. She kept her mouth shut about it for now, though: if it wasn't in Applebloom's head to say it, than Sweetie would not be the one to spill the beans.

The pair soon left the crowd of ponies as they reached the boundaries of the festival. Scootaloo glanced behind them to groan in irritation. This was taking far longer then Scootaloo would've liked. Maybe she should leave Sweetie behind and fly to the farm, but something had caught Scootaloo's gaze. A booth with scooters of different kinds and colors hanging from its holders and placed all around it like a brilliant dream. A smaller group of ponies were standing around it as one, most likely the owner, stood before them and talked to them with exagerated movements of his arms and a bright smile on his face to compliment it. A little colt was sitting next to him, wearing the scooter's safety gear. It brought about a youthful vision of when she had been just foal zooming through the streets of Ponyville.

"Hey Sweetie." Scootaloo pointed out the booth. "I think we just found a way to get over to Sweet Apple Acres a whole lot faster. Come on."

Like a little filly, Scootaloo began to dash off towards the scooters, but was held back by Sweetie Belle grabbing her arm. Sweetie's bright green eyes looked deeply into her's as Scootaloo looked back up at the unmoving pony. "But Scootaloo, if Applebloom is so important to you, why didn't you run after her sooner?"

Her question held an innocent's tone that Sweetie was always known for, but it hit home in Scootaloo. All she could do was shake her head and shrug her shoulders. "I don't know. Maybe I was still overjoyed by being with Rainbow Dash when I haven't seen her in so long, and I didn't think it was so important until that nagging feeling hit. I want to fix that. Sweetie Belle let the pegasus' hand slip through her's as she stood there, thinking about the answer before she followed.

The salespony was in the middle of a sales pitch. "...the stylish colors are not too cheap either, if I do say so myself. Your kids would love something like this to play on outside, and..."

"Excuss me, sorry to interupt but I would be interested in buying a scooter and two sets of gear." Scootaloo interupted.

"Ma'am, don't you see I'm in the middle of something?" He huffed at Scootaloo, his entire demeanor flipped one-eighty. "It can wait until after I'm done with the demonstration." He gestered to the colt.

"No, it can't wait. Here," Scootaloo pulled out a hundred bit bill and let it fall in front of the stallion. "Keep the change so it won't interupt your demonstration." She proceeded to pull a scooter down from the holdings of the booth along with the helmet and safety pads. "Come on Sweetie," She handed her friend a set of safety gear. "I only have enough for one scooter, so get that gear on."

Magic seemed to tingle in Scootaloo's fingertips when she admiringly held up held up the fire decorated helmet to place it atop her head. The click of the strap under her chin was like thunder echoing in the sky on a rainy night. The arm and knee pads hugged her joints, but not so tight that they were uncomfortable; in fact, Scootaloo felt more comfortable with them on than without.

Her scooter. It was beautiful and awesome at the same time. It was so much like her old one. What else could she do but admire the craftmenship and design, from the style of the footboard to the very mynute details of the decoritive sticker. That was the best that Scootaloo could do trying to put how she felt into words. It was a feeling that was nostaligic feeling to her foalhood, and it was absolutly awesome and amazing at the same time.

With everything on correctly, Scootaloo stepped her foot onto the scooter, and a humming pulse enveloped everything in her. Her wings flapped, her being unable to hold them still out of the pure exceitement that she could do this after a year without it. Such a short time, but it felt so long to her: now that she could do what she loved again, it was a high she wanted to feel forever.

She turned to Sweetie to tell her to get on, but stopped when she saw that Sweetie had yet to even put the helmet atop her head. She just stared at it like it was going to attack her. "Come on Sweetie, get that gear on, we need to get going."

"You know, I never really liked doing this when we were foals. I had nightmares forever back then that I would fall off and get hurt." Her hands rubbed together unconsciously, not to the thought of the unicorn. She kept her feet tightly placed on the ground, never moving an inch out of fear.

Scootaloo stepped off the scooter, letting the magical feeling die out to embrace Sweetie in a friendly hug. "Sweetie, you know I would never do anything that would get you hurt, right?"

But Sweetie only sighed ominously. "I remember you got us in some terrible situations when we were younger. Like hang gliding, whitewater rafting, rock climbing. Even going into the Everfree Forest sometimes to get our cutie marks." Sweetie spoke with complete sadness, like watching a loving pet going away for a while.

What was sad to Scootaloo was that thinking back on everything that the Cutie Mark Crusaders had done to try and get their cutie marks, Sweetie was right. She had put the girls into more dangerous situations than not in those years not too long ago. But now, she was older, and more willing than ever to truly show that she could protect her friends. "I know I have done some things that could merit me as a bad friend, with what I made you and Applebloom do with me, but I'm not the same filly as I was back then." Scootaloo raised her right hand up next to her cheek and closed her eyes. "This mare before you now promises to not put you into any danger that I have no control over."

After her little speech and vow were finished, Scootaloo reopened her eyes to see Sweetie Belle smiling up at her. The unicorn only nodded before pulling herself out of the hug to begin putting on the safety gear.

A small amout of clapping started up right behind Scootaloo. She turned her head at the group who was originally watching the scooter stallion's presentation. The stallion himself was now glaring with irritated at the pair, now that his crowd was no longer focusing on buying his product.

When Sweetie Belle was finished putting everything on, and Scootaloo had fixed her knee pads, which had been strapped on upside down, the unicorn carefully placed her foot on the wooden board of the scooter and wrapped her arms around Scootaloo's waist.

Feeling that Sweetie was ready for this, Scootaloo tensed up her wing muscles in her back, forcing forced the feathered appendages to flick out in a wide spread, anthem like start, pushing the wind around her. Having been trained by the greatest flyer in all of Equestria, Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo knew how wings worked and how to work them them exactly to her advantage, while showing off at the same time without losing that advantage. Tensing up her muscles to flap the wings down and push the air, allowing her to move foreward just a fraction, she loosened up again to allow everything to go back to where they began to repeat the cycle.

But something wasn't right. The scooter wasn't moving all that fast, nothing like she had when she was younger. Sweetie Belle noticed this as well, asking: "Is this as fast as you're going to go? Not that I'm complaining." Out of the corner of her eye, Scootaloo saw the salespony chucking to himself at the impressive showing off, which was ruined by the poor finish. Scootaloo would not let him have the last laugh. Scootaloo tensed up even more to flap her wings even harder, but this strained herself instead of making the scooter to fly down the street. What was she doing wrong? Thinking back to when she was a foal, what had she done that was different?

She had never done the correct muscle tensing and releasing that Rainbow Dash had taught her later on. After learning how to fly, she never had ridden her scooter at all. That was it! It was all in the technique. She had buzzed her wings because she hadn't learned the proper technique yet. That buzzing forced her wings to move faster than even Rainbow Dash's could, it must've pushed enough air to get her to move as fast as she wanted. The only thing she would have to do to actually achieve this, was go against what was actually correct.

"It's fine Scoots," Sweetie Belle said behind her. "We could just walk up to the farm, it isn't that far."

"No, I just need to focus on something." Scootaloo had to prove to herself now, there was no turning back. That salespony was going to eat that laugh when she was done with him, and the crowd would be amazed, no doubt.

Scootaloo focused on her wing muscles again, trying to remember how she had done it before. She gave a few experimental flaps to feel the movement and the tension. It felt the same out of habit, and Scootaloo growled to herself, much like she had when she was little and trying to fight the old habit that she had developed then. She forced herself to think hard on it and to feel what was going on, but it always felt the same: nothing changed like she wanted.

Then a thought passed through the pegasus' mind: what if it wasn't tightening the muscles to flap, but keeping everything as loose as possible? She focused on her wing muscles again. Starting with tiny flaps, she kept herself as relaxed as she could. Something happened that Scootaloo hadn't expected though: her wings, doing the tiny, limp flaps that she could manage, started to move faster and faster. Scootaloo wanted to shout out to the world in joy, but kept herself focused. After a few seconds of her wings getting faster, a quiet buzz began to faintly sound. As her wings went faster and faster, the buzzing got louder and louder. The scooter began to shake a bit, move foreward a tiny bit. Scootaloo could hear the crowd murmering to each other. When she felt that she was ready for the final push, she opened her eyes and stared down the path that she would be taking. It was clear of anypony. Perfect. The small crowd from before had grown in size a bit with additianal ponies wanting to see what the commotion was.

"Hang on Sweetie Belle." She spoke to her friend. "It's showtime." With her wings moving faster than they had in a long time, Scootaloo gave another push and the scooter lurched foreward in an explosion of force that propelled the toy down the road, with Sweetie Belle screaming off the top of her lungs, as they moved faster than the average pegasus could fly overhead. Scootaloo only wished she could see the look on that salespony's face.

"AHHHHHHHHHH HELP MEEEEEE I'M GOING TO DIIIIIIEEEE!" Sweetie Belle screamed from behind Scootaloo's ear, but she didn't even hear it. She was too busy feeling the joy she hadn't felt since she was a filly, a large smile plastered over her face.

She gives a hearty shout of overzealious glee into the sky, shouting, ""WHOOOOOOHOOOO! I forgot how awesome this felt! Flying has nothing on this!"

On the flash of a buzzing scooter flying down the road to the outskirts of Ponyville, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle followed their friend to Sweet Apple Acres.

---

The wagon wheels creaked and groaned in agitation to Applejack, who was pulling the semi-heavy cart up the small hill that led up to the Apple family home. Applebloom had offered to help push from behind, seeing her sister struggle a bit at the weight, but the older mare simply refused. No reason why, just a no. The day had progressed nicely for Applebloom: it was still not too hot or not too cold. Applejack parked the cart right in front of the apple loading area, which had too many apple-filled baskets for Applebloom to count, and unhitched herself from the leather harness, saying: "Alright Bloom, I'm gonna get Big Mac over here for us to have our little talk. Shouldn't be too long."

Of course, the east side the Apple family orchard alone was huge, and that was where Big Mac worked. It was going to be a little bit before her siblings returned, so where was Granny Smith? Probably in the house somewhere.

Applebloom walked over to the simple, wood, hand built home that had been built in the time of Granny Smith's youth by her dad. Boy had it withstood the test of time. The well oiled door didn't even squeak when she opened it, although then she stepped on a creaky wooden board. Well, not everything had to be perfect in every way. Where was the fun in that? There was a clanging of metal pots in the kitchen, the place where Bloom could usually find the ancient Apple when she wasn't sleeping in her chair, snoring the day away. The smell of a baking homemade pumpkin pie in the oven made Applebloom's mouth water.

She walked to the kitchen to see the mark of a well practiced chef and baker: everything was placed exactly where they were supposed to be and not a single mess could be seen anywhere. Granny Smith slowly made her shaking way from the butcher block in the center of the half-circle of counters to the counters themselves, while carrying a large bowl. The seasoning contents spilled over the sides from Granny's shaking, so Applebloom calmly went over and asked hopefully: "Need some help with dinner Granny?"

Granny's toothless smile was a warm welcome to the young mare, like before when she would help Granny with Zap Apple Jam, or making an Equestrian famous Apple family carmalized pie. "Of course ya can. Here, take this bowl of seasoning powder, my old bones just can't seem to keep up with my energy these days." The old mare gave a wheezing chuckle, as she gave Applebloom the bowl, who couldn't help but return with her own laugh. "Such a helpful Apple. We sure did right raisin' ya. Of course you can help this old bag of bones get things done."

With all the experience Applebloom had with helping Granny out in the kitchen before, it didn't take long for her to get into the rhythem that this kitchen had. She placed the bowl of seasonings on the butcher block next to the celery stalks that had been laid out there before. Looking at everything that Granny Smith had put out- the celery, some dough, the apples, the wiggly slabs of tofu, and the broth- she could see that a sweet and sour soup was in the works. As Granny went to cut up the celary and apples, Applebloom went to work on making some homemade noodles. This was her favorite thing to do in the kitchen when she was a foal, and the memories that followed made her giggle with glee, as if she had too much sugar, at the feeling of being able to finally do it again.

She patted some flour on her hands so that the dough wouldn't stick to them before she began rolling the dough into a long snake-like shape. The squish between her fingers was like a massage for her hands, relaxing them, and helping her to imagine a little red haired filly standing next to her great granny, smiling cheerfully with flour all over her face, looking up at the still old mare as she taught Bloom the ways of the kitchen. She could even smell the eggs that had gone into making it. A bar could never offer this to her with its glasses smelling of whiskey all the time.

After the dough was in its lengthened form, rolled up, but not as perfectly as Applebloom remembered doing it, she looked at Granny who was watching her from the butcher block. She wasn't even paying attention to cutting the celery, but years of training her hands let her cut the celery perfectly. Granny eyed the dough, smiled softly, then nodded her head. This made Applebloom's heart leap in her chest with a mix of apprehension and fear. She had to make the noodles, and this itself was an art form few ponies could do correctly. Granny Smith was one, and Applebloom was her protege.

Taking a few deep breaths, she grasped the dough and loosely held the mush in her relaxed hand. She faced the counter, but stood far enough away from it to not become a hindrance for her. Everything hinged on Applebloom keeping her concentration and her remembering exactly what to do. She flicked her wrists to make the dough spin around on itself, twisting a tiny bit near her hands. She breathed and repeated it again, spinning it around at head level before flopping it down on the counter. She then folded the dough in half and pulled a tiny bit before repeating the process. Slowly, the dough began to separate into thin noodle-like strings. Still connected, she broke the dough in half and continued the process with that one half until the noodles finally separated into what she had wanted. Feeling the complete satisfaction of creating something, she did the same for the remaining half of the dough. When it was all over, a display of noodles lay before Applebloom as she breathed heavily at how much energy it had taken.

Applebloom looked down at the noodles in surprise and bafflement that she had made them herself: Granny hadn't even had to remind her how to do it, it had all come back naturally to her. Granny smiled brightly while clapping her shriveled hands. "That was wonderful, ya make me so proud Applebloom."

Bloom blushed and looked away. "Well, how could I have forgotten what you had taught me?"

"Ya did forget to put on the Neighjen spices ah had prepared in that bowl beforehand, but ah don't think it'll be a problem to add them now: reminds me of when you were first learnin' to make this dish." Granny chuckled and returned to chopping.

The sound of the front door opening greeted the pair as hooves clicked over the creaking floorboards. "Ah think ah know exactly where she is." Applejack's voice sounded from down the hall before her head poked into the kitchen, smiling at the duo. Granny Smith was just finishing up on chopping the veggies, and Applebloom was just buttering the noodles in a bowl of spices. "Exactly where ah thought. Ya havin fun there 'Bloom?"

Applebloom's grin was larger than Applejack had seen in a long time. "Of course ah ahm. Somethin' like this will be rearin' ta go, sis." Her mouth rounded on the accent that she horribly tried to recreate.

Applejack couldn't help but laugh slightly at her little sister's childish attitude. "Now, ya know ya don't have that much of an accent. Heck, ah don't either. Ya been around other pony folk too often to have much of one." She returned the poke of fun back at Applebloom, who never retracted her smile as she finished up with the noodles and poured the spicy, buttered concontion into a large kettle that was sitting on the unlit stove, ready for use.

"Well now, I haven't heard the kitchen so quiet in a long time. Being that Applejack tries to help Granny Smith." He playfully poked fun at his sister whose returning smile spun around into a sulk. He just chuckled at her expression, followed by Granny's squeaky giggle and Applebloom's youthful laugh. Applejack just glared at each one of her family members, unmoving, trying hard to not to give them anymore satisfaction at her not-so-big expense.

"Oh Applejack, you're just like how your father was, he never had a sense of humor much either." Granny's scratching chuckle followed. She had to turn away from the veggies as she had to cough up a lung from laughing so much. But it was all in good fun: it was why the four worked so well together, and Applejack knew that, even if she didn't like to admit it sometimes.

Applebloom looked at the scene before her with happiness. But still, buried deep within that happiness was a wrenching feeling of longing. She didn't get to see things like this anymore since the bar closes late, meaning everypony else was fast asleep by the time she got home. It was nice to be wth her family for just a little while every so often. It fought off the loneliness that she had been feeling, and made her feel as if she was really was truly a part of the Apple family.

"Ah think it's about time we got to talkin', huh Applebloom?" Applejack shredded her words through clenched teeth. She didn't even wait for Applebloom's answer, and she walked out of the kitchen into the hallway past the living room.

Applebloom looked over at Big Mac, who stood in the same spot with his arms at his sides, his freckled face looking out at nothing with the same expression that always made ponies think nopony was home.

Granny Smith squeaked again with her laugh. "Go on ya youngens, this ol' mare's got no part in this serious talk." Granny Smith nudged Applebloom into moving towards the door. "This sounds mighty important. Don't worry though; I'll have supper ready by the time y'all get back; thanks for the help, young Applebloom."

Applebloom and Big Mac followed their sister out of the kitchen to where she was waiting for them outside the front door. Big Mac quietly closed the silent door behind him. Not saying a word, Applejack led them over to the barn. She pushed the large door open with a forceful shove, and it screamed at her back as the hinges moved.

Applebloom hadn't been inside the barn since she had opened the bar, because there had been no need to do so. The moldy scent of unused hay hung around the place, and made the young mare scrunch up her nose at the smell; it was cringeworthy when you stopped being used to it. Did the smell ever bother Sweetie and Scoots when they would do anything in there? They never complained. Farming equipment was everywhere, but organized in the way Big Mac liked it. Applejack? Not so much. In an area off to the side was a small stack of hay bales that was perfect for sitting and talking. Applejack closed the door behind them, to give them so privacy, and the family walked over there and sat down: Applebloom on one side, and her older sibling on the other.

It was that first awkward moment where neither Applejack nor Applebloom knew what to say. Big Mac didn't want to say anything, knowing that this was something that was mostly between his sisters; that, and the fact that he had pretty much no idea what the hay was going on with his little sister, only that it was tearing the young mare apart from what Applejack had told him on the way from the orchard.

About a minute passed before Applejack stood up and looked straight at her sister with complete love, but a piercing glare was right behind it, thus Applebloom knew that she wasn't going to be getting the pity from Applejack... but what else could she have expected from the mare? "All right, this is not a time ta beat around the bush, Ah'm worried about ya li'l sis. What's got ya thinkin' that you're not a part of the family? Is it really just because ya can't help us work on the farm as much as ya used to? Ya do know that blood is thicker than sweat."

The suddenness of Applejack putting her on the spot blanked Applebloom's mind as white as a snowfall. Mental planning couldn't help her with this. An Apple thought on their feet through any situation that they were put in. If Applebloom wanted to prove that she was an Apple, she would push on through the problem head on.

The problem wasn't only that she couldn't work on the farm, the problem was much deeper than that. It had to do with the atmosphere of the home and this barn right now: it hadn't felt right since she had been a foal. The warm nature of everything was replaced with the cold night when she got back home to a cold meal waiting for her in the oven. The crickets outside were the only things that helped with the silence of the kitchen, but they only reminded Applebloom of the abscence of others even more, acting like a knife stabbing her in the heart.

This destroyed Applebloom's good mood from cooking with her great granny. It was replaced with the real reason she was here in the first place, and that was to let loose her worries and fears to her family, but that only made the fear grow. The thoughts of loneliness angered Applebloom too, but she didn't know why. Was it that she was lonely? No. It was something else.

She glanced up at Applejack through her lowered brow. Her teeth were clenched tight in her jaw. Applejack could easily see that her little sister was fighting something in herself, and wished with everything that she had that she could help her in that fight, but Applebloom wasn't being open about it. How was she going to be a good big sister if she couldn't help her little sister when she needed it the most?

Applebloom crossed her arms, her eyes continuing to pierce her sister. Her gaze: fangs on the maw, expelled everything that the farm girl had felt without words, but Applejack was looking for a worded answer, and Applebloom had no idea what it was she was actually supposed to say to really begin the describe the burning of the picture of Applebloom's identity. It was a lot harder than she thought it would be, maybe it wasn't such a good idea. She rocked back and forth on her feet, watching the straw buckle beneath her weight. The oppressive weight, like a foot atop of her, at what she had gotten herself into, and all that she could say to Applejack, made things even harder. Really, all she could do was steel herself, and just go with what her mind could think up, the scene of that bar in Ponyville with the expertly crafted wooden furniture and stone cut fire pit in the center of it all. The emptiness on the Apple home as a shaded background.

The anger sliced through the picture, welling up from somewhere Applebloom had no idea where to begin with when she wanted to talk to Applejack. The strange thing was that it was all directed at the mare. Applebloom clenched her fist to hold her temper in check, but even with precaution, her words were tainted with raw, untainted passion.

"I wake up every morning just after the sun has begun to rise," She began, immediantly speaking in a dream-like fashion. Never taking a breath. "And I hear y'all talking downstairs having breakfast, usually laughing. I have to look presentable to the customers, so I have to, as you say Applejack, pull an all Rarity and clean up myself. This takes time, and by the time I'm finished, y'all are outside already and Granny is asleep in her chair like clockwork. I eat what you leave for me alone, and I head to town to open the bar. I look at the orchard and I see y'all out there working your plots off, and I just think that I should be right there beside you helping in any way I could like I did when I was a foal. I just feel so angry that I can't do what I've always done. Almost like I'm a freeloader."

Applejack let her sister catch her breath after her rant before she answered. "Applebloom," She softly spoke to the mare: she wanted to have her undivided attention when she talked to her. At first there wasn't any movement, but she finally moved her head up. The minute that her bright blue eyes met Applejack's green, Applejack knew that there was something else in that gaze. The distance from her family might be a problem, but it wasn't the main problem. Applebloom wasn't being honest with herself, Applejack was darn sure of it.

But Applejack wasn't Rainbow Dash, and she wasn't going to accuse Applebloom of doing something for no particular reason. She had to be smart about this and play her cards right. "Alright Applebloom. Ah know how you are feelin' right now. Remember when ah told ya Cutie Mark Crusaders about when I left the farm to live in the city with my family that lived up there?" Applebloom nodded her head as she stood up and paced a little bit by the hay bale. "Ah was thinkin' that ah would be happier away from everything that ah had known in my life." She turned her head to follow her sister's back and forth movements. "Turned out ah was wrong."

Applebloom stopped her pacing, continuing to cut her sister with her gaze. She lightly threw her arms out to the side and let gravity slap them against her thigh. "Alright, so... How is this supposed to help me?"

Applejack slapped her forehead and shook her head into her hand at her sister not getting it. "It means that ah know your pain, lil' sis." She looked back up. "Ah found my problem and ah fixed it, but you've yet to even tackle the problem you're in, and it's makin' you cranky and rude."

Applebloom shook her head slowly, keeping her gaze on her older sister. "No. I don't think you do understand the problem that I'm in." She pointed her finger at Applejack in an accusing way. "That bar has caused a lot of problems for me! Ever since I opened it, all I've gotten was difficulty with everything!" Applebloom whined, throwing her hands up in the air in her last sentence before they crossed across her chest once again. "And you did that to me." She spoke almost in a whisper at that last part. Her face softened from anger to depression as she looked down at the straw laying about the ground.

Applejack was shocked, her mouth hanging open, at such an accusation. Actually, it sounded more to her like whining about the hard times than any actual problem. Her willingness to help her little sis went out like a candle, as her face scrunched up in aggravation and uncontrolled anger.

She jumped off the hay bale and launched herself at her sister, who stepped back in surprise at the sudden temper. Applebloom has seen her sister this mad before, and it wasn't pretty. The only thing that stopped her sister from coming any closer that was Applejack had placed her foot up on the bale she was sitting on before. Applejack pressed her muzzle up against Applebloom, forcing her eyes to be all Bloom could see.

"Now listen here missy." Applejack pressed the backs of her hands against her hips and leaned closer to Applebloom, her face matching Applebloom's earlier scowl. "I don't like to listen to ponies whine about how life has gotten difficult. I think I see the problem, and that problem is you don't like the changes that have happened in your life. You had an easy foalhood, and suddenly, you have responsibilities now. You took your anger out on Scootaloo. You haven't been exactly honest with yourself, thus you haven't been happy." She was all business and no nonsense. "I was willing to pity you sister, but that was when I thought you were actually trying to do things right. Now, I know that you are just looking for the easy way out."

Applejack finished her piece. The strong mare, whom Applebloom looked up to so much, for so long, and thought would always be there for her, turned her back on Applebloom and walked towards the barn door. She felt a presence move past her. She looked up to see that Big Mac was following Applejack out. The barn door squeaked again as the pair were about to walk out. Applebloom's throat clenched up as a deep sulky feeling crushed her beneath regret. Out of regret came panic. A panic that she was losing something that was important to her, something that she had been fighting this whole time to keep. Without thinking, Applebloom cried out, managing to keep her voice from trembling or from bawling her eyes out then and there. "You said honesty was everything Applejack!" She took a deep breath in. "I've been honest with everypony that I have talked to! What else could I have done!?"

Just before Big Mac walked out of sight through the barn door, in the wake of Applejack, he turned to his little sister and simply asked, "Honest with yourself?"

Those three words spiraled like a snake at Applebloom. They coiled around her body and squeezed the breath out of her, yet she held her hand out to them, trying desperatly to keep them away from her. But the truth forced its way into her either way. She covered her ears, curling down on her feet in a fetal position, not wanting to face the truth, but the wall came tumbling down. Applejack was right when she said that honesty was everything. Unable to think about anything else, she reprimanded herself for everything. Applejack had opened a vault that Applebloom herself had locked shut to protect herself, and to put the blame on everypony else... except for her sister.

The truth about herself terrified her. She actually had forced memories out of her mind. What was real and what was not? Applebloom panicked, feeling like she had to run to the nearest safe place. The barn doors were in the way, but she spun into a kick, and her foot smashed through the wood and threw the door open enough for the mare to flee past her suprised siblings to the house. She threw open the front door and ran up the wooden stairs, not paying attention to Granny Smith's stare of surprice from the kitchen doorway. Applebloom launched herself through the last door in the small upstairs hallway, shutting the door behind her, and covered herself with her blanket...and cried.

Author's Note:

This would be the second time I've uploaded this chapter. I was originally going to cut out the talking scene at the end, but I figured it was a perfect conclusion. As always, BlackRoseRaven edited this and made it look "perty fer yall ta read". You guys are awesome and thank you for sticking with me for so long.

Comments

[Lovinlife]

5167604 I hope I can fullfill your expectations