To Be A Princess

by WellKPony

Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten

“Her Royal Highness, Princess Twilight Sparkle!”

A chorus of trumpets played a magnificent fanfare as Twilight made her way down a grand, red carpeted staircase which led into the main hall of Canterlot Castle. Her eyes darted around the room as she attempted to see everything at once. A broad smile spread unbidden across her face. With all of the pressure that had been heaped upon her all day and the nerves that that had caused, she finally had reason to be excited. This gala was going to be magnificent.

The hall was decorated beautifully with fresh flowers and brightly coloured ribbons adorned every surface. Dozens, if not hundreds of ponies were packed into the room. They were all dressed in their finest gowns and tuxedos for the occasion and, not surprisingly given the introduction, everypony was staring at her. She was getting used to this, having been subject to it all day. It was still rather unnerving but it was only for a moment. She willed herself to keep going; to put one hoof in front of the other and not to make a fool of herself.

Twilight searched the crowd for familiar faces. Or rather one face in particular. And despite the vast number of ponies present, it took her only a few seconds to find it. Fluttershy was standing at the very back of the hall with Princess Cadence. A far away smile adorned her features as she watched Twilight descend the stairs; a smile that filled Twilight with a warm glow. The pegasus didn’t seem to notice that Twilight was looking right back at her. She looked like her mind was somewhere else entirely. That didn’t last too long though. Cadence had nudged her gently and whispered something in her ear, at which point she coloured and looked away. Her lips moved quickly as she replied to whatever it was the Princess had said and Cadence gave her a pat on the shoulder, whispering in her ear again as she did so. Fluttershy smiled and looked back up at Twilight, waving slowly.

Twilight waved back. What was that? That hoof on the shoulder had looked like an attempt at consolation. What were they talking about? Maybe she was just being paranoid, but she couldn't help but feel that they were talking about her.

As she reached the first balcony though, all thought of this left her mind. She looked out over the hall again. There was a great deal of movement: a sort of jostling for position. Even before she had reached the foot of the stairs, a queue had begun to form. Well, not a queue per se, but rather a strange sort of linear crowd. A queue which wasn’t supposed to look like a queue. Almost all of the ponies present had arranged themselves into a makeshift order and stood waiting for their turn to speak to the new princess.

Twilight swallowed hard, glancing over towards Fluttershy who was now deep in conversation with Cadence. There would be time to talk to her later. For now, she had duties to perform. With a deep, calming breath, Twilight stepped off of the staircase and into the waiting throng. Her eyes glazed over as she attempted to assess the size of the queue. There were a lot of ponies there. Although she had anticipated that he would have to greet ponies when she arrived, she hadn’t counted on the sheer number that were present. She glanced over at Fluttershy again: there would be time. She would make time.

The couple who had fought their way to the front of the queue made their way forward. Twilight froze. Now that it came down to it, she realised that she had no idea how she was supposed to greet them. Should she bow? Should she expect them to bow? Would a simple hoofshake suffice? Would they expect her to know their names? Her nerves were back with a vengeance. She had seen Princess Celestia do this a million times. What was it that she had done?

“The Duke and Duchess of Whineybridge, ma’am.” Twilight jumped a little when she heard the whisper in her ear. Her head whipped around sharply. She had been joined on one side by a young hoofpony with a grey coat and a black mane. She mouthed her thanks to him and he gave her a respectful nod.

Twilight’s heart pounded as the couple drew ever closer. What would she say? At least she knew their names and where they were from, now. That was a start. But what would they want to talk about? Perhaps they wouldn’t want to have a huge conversation anyway. Perhaps they would just want to say hello and get on with their evening. Although that hardly seemed worthwhile. Perhaps she could talk about magic. They were unicorns, they might be interested.

There was no time to think though. Before she knew it, they had arrived in front of her and were bowing deeply. Twilight blushed and bowed back. The couple looked at each other awkwardly. Twilight smiled nervously at them. Had that been wrong? They certainly looked like that wasn't what they had expected. There was a short pause before the Duchess smiled back and nudged her husband lightly in the chest.

“Congratulations, Princess! It’s so wonderful to meet you,” he said with a surreptitious glance towards his wife.

“Thank you,” Twilight said meekly.

There was another short silence. For her part, Twilight had absolutely no idea what she was supposed to do and, having made one mistake already, she felt terribly uncomfortable. She shifted her weight gently from one forehoof to the other, waiting for the Duke or Duchess to break the silence. Neither appeared like they wanted to do so, although the Duchess looked to be growing rather impatient. Twilight cleared her throat and decided she ought to go for it.

“So, um, how was your journey from Whineybridge? That’s quite a distance to have come,” she ventured, deciding to go with her initial idea.

“It was quite alright, thank you ma’am,” the Duchess answered in the plummiest voice Twilight had ever heard. “And you are originally from Ponyville, we are told. How are you finding Canterlot?”

“It’s great! You know, I actually lived here for most of my life,” Twilight said, trying to provide an interesting talking point, although she immediately wished she hadn’t. The Duchess bit her lip and blushed profusely. She looked like a filly who had given the wrong answer in class. Not only that, but everything suddenly felt incredibly tense. Twilight pulled at the neck of her gown and cleared her throat so that she could continue.

“It’s wonderful to be back though. I might have been born here, but I’m a Ponyville pony at heart,” she added hastily, trying to keep things natural.

The Duchess’ shoulders relaxed slightly but she looked as though she didn’t dare open her mouth again. Silence descended once more, the gap being filled by the murmur of distant conversations. Twilight looked back and forth between the Duke and Duchess, hoping that somepony would say something.

“Well, um, I hope you have a good evening. I look forward to speaking with you again,” Twilight said carefully after a few seconds. She didn’t want to offend them any further, but it was quite clear that he wasn’t much of a talker and she didn’t feel much making any conversation. It wasn’t that she wanted rid of them, either. It was just that she had hundreds of ponies to meet and she couldn’t afford to keep them all waiting. Besides, she had other important things to be doing.

As the couple bowed and walked off, Twilight glanced around the beautifully decorated hall, trying to find Fluttershy again. She desperately wanted to speak to her before she lost her nerve. There she was: she and Cadence had obviously parted ways. She was now standing with Rarity and Applejack smiling and laughing at something one of the others had said. Her eyes always sparkled so prettily when she laughed. Twilight’s mind wandered off, getting lost in images of Fluttershy laughing: some real, some imagined. She touched the spot on her dress where she had stowed the little note that Fluttershy had written for her, hoping that it wasn’t already too late.

“Pony Giuliani, the Mayor of Manehattan,” the hoofpony whispered in Twilight’s ear, bringing her back to the present. Twilight smiled at the approaching pony. She could get through this. It would only take an hour or so, then she could get on with her plan. She looked wistfully back over at Fluttershy. It would be worth the wait.

* * * * *

“Lord Toffeenose of Fillydelphia.”

Twilight was growing more and more impatient. Easily three hours had passed and she was still standing in the same spot, greeting ponies she didn’t know while everypony else danced, drank fancy champagne and chatted amongst themselves. Despite a somewhat positive start, it now felt like it would never end. She had had good intentions. She had wanted to speak to all of the guests, but none of them seemed to want to spend any real time at all with her.

“Madam Buttercup of Trottingham.”

To make matters worse, she had lost track of Fluttershy just over an hour ago and that was making her much more nervous about, well, about everything. The last time she had seen the pegasus, she had been dancing with Pinkie Pie. Then Twilight had had to speak to somepony new and when she looked back, Fluttershy was was nowhere to be seen.

“Lord Whooves of Gallopfrey.”

And whilst she was glad to meet all of these ponies, it was beginning to look a lot like the evening would be over before she had a chance to do anything she had planned to do. Or anything at all for that matter. At least the line was beginning to thin out a little. There was probably only a dozen or so ponies left. That said, given how long the rest had taken, a dozen might take her the rest of the evening.

“Prince Blueblood of Canterlot.”

Twilight continued to scan the hall for signs of her friends. Pinkie Pie, of course, was still dancing much to the displeasure of a few of the guests. Rarity was stood at the centre of a large group of ponies, many of whom had had fancy titles when they had been introduced to Twilight. She looked to be in her element. Applejack was milling around at the hors d’oeuvre table, guiltily putting five or six of each item onto an empty plate. The others were nowhere to be seen.

They were probably outside somewhere. Most likely they would be together. Neither Fluttershy nor Rainbow were very keen on fancy parties.

“Princess Celestia of Equestria.”

“Huh?” Twilight’s head snapped round to look at the hoofpony and back. Sure enough, the Princess was walking towards her with a mischievous smile pulling at her cheeks and a mirthful glint in her eyes.

“Good evening, Princess,” Celestia laughed, stopping in front of Twilight and bowing politely. Twilight smiled and bowed back. It was good to see another familiar face. The only other pony she had recognised thus far had been Mayor Mare.

“I saw that you were almost finished here and I thought I would come over for a quick word. How did you find it?” Celestia said, whispering the final question.

“I’m not really sure,” Twilight whispered back. “Is everypony always so formal?”

“In a word, yes. Between the two of us, I’m not overly fond of it either,” Celestia said glancing surreptitiously around to make sure nopony had heard. “It’s always the same faces. I try to have a bit of fun with it sometimes, but usually I just let it wash over me.”

Twilight nodded her head. She had been doing the same thing. After the first few conversations had gone pretty much the same way, she had just let herself drift away into her own little world. She had wanted to talk to everypony and to listen attentively, but nopony wanted to have a real conversation. They just wanted to give her their regards and get on with their night. None of them seemed to be remotely concerned about anything Twilight had to say.

“To be honest, I much prefer court. There’s a lot more to it. Luna was always better at this,” Celestia continued, indicating the two or three ponies left waiting to speak to Twilight.

“I wouldn’t have thought she had the patience. Where is she anyway? I haven’t seen her all night.” Twilight craned her neck over the crowd, searching for Luna’s dark, flowing mane somewhere in its midst.

“You wouldn’t think so, but Luna is full of surprises. You must have been busy if you haven’t seen her. She’s barely left the party since it started. She went outside a moment or two ago to raise the Moon. She’s probably still out there. She always liked to show off when other ponies were around. She’ll be playing around with the stars or something. I’m sure you’ll see her before the end of the evening.

“However, I should go. You’ll want to greet your last few guests. Oh, and congratulations, Princess,” Celestia said with a wink.

“Thank you, Princess.”

* * * * *

Every step felt precarious as Twilight left her place at the foot of the stairs, not least of all because she had been standing in the same spot for well over two hours and her legs were stiff and tired. But there was also the lingering expectation that there were still ponies left to meet and that, with every step she took, the chances of one of them stopping her increased. That couldn’t happen. There was so much left to do. She quickened her pace, despite the aches.

It wasn’t that she didn’t want to speak to anypony. She had been speaking to them all night, after all, and they were all interesting in their own ways. It was just that she had been speaking to them all night and that meant she hadn’t been able to speak to the one pony she had wanted to speak to. Meanwhile her friends had been off enjoying themselves with the rest of the guests. Of course, being a princess, she had acquired certain duties and obligations but that didn’t mean that she couldn’t expect a little time to herself.

Strangely, nopony even seemed to notice her now. Or if the did, it was only to nod at her and move out of her way. The room felt even fuller when she moved around it than it had looked when she was stationary. It was too full: too busy and too loud. She had to get some fresh air. She could find Fluttershy once she had had a chance to collect her thoughts.

The castle’s great doors stood ajar, allowing Twilight to quietly slip out and onto the stone path which led to the main gate. There was still a smattering of ponies outside, but not one of them seemed to have noticed her presence. She quickly removed her crown, stowing it safely under her dress and with that she began walking, not along any of the paths that existed between the castle and its walls, but straight across the lawns.

It was a mild night. The air was cool but not cold and the breeze was soft and gentle. A full moon hung low in the sky, making it appear larger than usual and its light cast everything in a wonderfully pale glow. The stars in the sky sparkled like fireworks which had just burst open. Twilight couldn’t recall ever having seen a more beautiful evening. Perhaps this was the result of Luna’s showing off.

After a few moments, she reached the place she had been walking to. She hadn’t really been paying attention to where her hooves were taking her but now that she had arrived, she realised it was exactly where she had wanted to be. A small tree with long hanging branches stood alone by edge of a still pond. The buzz of the party going on at the castle had faded away into the distance to be replaced by the quiet chirping of crickets. Twilight sighed as she lay down under the tree and looked out across the water.

She used to read here as a young mare, growing up under the tutelage of Princess Celestia. She had passed many a summer’s afternoon in the shade of this tree learning everything she could about unicorn magic; about the history of her kind; about Equestria and the lands nearby; about the ponies, like Starswirl, who had contributed to the arts and sciences, politics and diplomacy. It had been in this very spot that she had first read about the tale of the mare in the moon and the elements of harmony. Indeed, that had been the last time she had lay here and she hadn’t been back since.

That had been such a long time ago. She took her crown out from under her dress and placed it carefully on the ground in front of her. How long had it been? Two years? Three? It felt strange to be back after everything that had happened. The pink stone in her crown glinted in the moonlight.

Time changed everything.

It was hard to imagine that in only a few short years she had gone from being a completely unremarkable unicorn filly, struggling to learn the basics of levitation by candlelight in her parents’ study to an alicorn Princess of Equestria whose magical power surpassed that of even the greatest unicorns in history. Yet she felt no different now from how she had then. She felt as though she still had everything to learn.

Her friendships had taught her many lessons and led her on many adventures. She had learned how to trust other ponies and how the powerful bonds she had with her friends had shown her how to be generous and kind, loyal and honest and optimistic. She had learned to have faith in what other ponies were telling her even if she couldn’t understand their reasoning. She had learned how ponies’ differences can make their friendships closer. She had learned to accept others’ help even if she felt like she didn’t need it.

Yet she didn’t feel like she knew the first thing about love. She withdrew Fluttershy’s note from under her dress, unfolding it and laying it in front of her. She picked up her crown and put that on top of the note to stop it flying away in the breeze.

“I’m sorry,” she read aloud. “Good luck.”

Then there was the hoofprint. There was definitely something in this. She had obsessed over the meaning of the note all afternoon between the coronation and the parade and between the parade and the start of the gala. It was only four words, but buried somewhere within the subtext was a deeper meaning and she still couldn’t fathom what that was. Twilight stared at the note, reading the words again and again.

It frustrated her that she couldn’t see this for what it was. If somepony had given her a page of complicated mathematics or a picture of the sky with one star missing, she would have had the answer and found the star in seconds. It was the flying problem all over again, except that she was absolutely certain there wasn’t a book in all of Equestria that could solve this problem. The only person who knew what Fluttershy meant was Fluttershy herself.

Twilight stood up and walked to the edge of the lake, picking up a few stones with her magic and skimming them across the water of the lake. Ripples disturbed the clear surface with each bounce. Twilight watched as the tiny waves worked their way to the banks, lost in thought. Perhaps the lessons she had learned about friendship could also be applied to love. Sharing your blessings, accepting one-another’s differences, not jumping to conclusions, being there to support one-another at the best and worst of times.

Twilight threw one last pebble across the water. It bounced merrily along the surface before finally giving up and dropping to the bottom with a small plop. She watched the last set of ripples until they disappeared and the pond reflected the sky once more. Fluttershy was her friend, though. It was true that they had kissed and that friends didn’t kiss friends – except perhaps on the cheek. She knew how she felt about that and how she felt about Fluttershy and she was happy with that. What was leaving her in this predicament was that she didn’t feel like she knew how Fluttershy felt about her.

She would have liked to believe that the fact that Fluttershy had initiated the kiss meant that she felt the same way. She was certain that that must have been the case in the first place, but given how timid the pegasus was and how Twilight had reacted to it, not to mention the apology in the letter, she was worried that she might have blown her chance.

That depended on a great many things, though. She wondered how long had Fluttershy felt like this about her. Twilight turned away from the pond, her eyes immediately falling on her crown. When she looked back, she was amazed that she hadn’t realised how Fluttershy had felt sooner. She could see all the little hints that the pegasus had been dropping. She remembered back to the day Fluttershy had brought her notebook to the library: the looks she had given Twilight; the little compliments she had casually slid into their conversation and the rather obvious one as she had left.

Then there was her visit to the spa with Rarity. She remembered how Fluttershy had sat next to her in the sauna and how she had been embarrassed when Twilight had noticed her looking at her after their hooficure. She had been fairly reticent about what she had wanted to do as they had gone to the mud baths without Rarity and there had been more of those hidden little compliments.

The dead giveaway, however, was only a few evenings ago when Twilight had run away from the castle after sitting at Celestia’s court. The night when Fluttershy had come out to the castle grounds to look for her. When they had lay next to one-another in the castle gardens and she had noticed Fluttershy’s heartbeat. She hadn’t been afraid of the dark. Of course she hadn’t. How ridiculous?

The more Twilight thought about it, the more she could see. The amount of time they had spent together was probably no different to the amount of time she had spent with the rest of her friends, but the amount of time they had spent alone together seemed significantly higher. And Fluttershy had always seemed very shy around her, even years after they had become friends.

If she had felt that way for such a long time, it was unlikely that she would change her mind about it so quickly. Twilight smiled, her heart filling up with confidence. Perhaps she hadn’t blown it. There might still be time. She would have to apologise to Fluttershy for how she had acted before, but there was every chance that the pegasus would accept that apology.

The fear of rejection that had been troubling her ever since she had realised her feelings for Fluttershy seemed to disappear. She remembered another lesson that she had learned, aptly enough from Fluttershy herself when they had both been trying to keep their feelings hidden: that you should never be afraid to share your true feelings with a good friend. Well, she would hide her feelings no longer. She would find Fluttershy and she would tell her everything and Fluttershy would be so happy and they would kiss again and then they would tell all of their friends and Celestia and Luna and—

“Oh, um, hello Twilight.”

Twilight jumped, her wings spreading involuntarily. It wasn’t because the voice had been loud or abrupt, but rather because it had been unexpected.

“Fluttershy! Hi!” she squeaked.

She felt her cheeks flush as she looked at her friend. Rationally, she knew that the pegasus could have no idea what train of thought she had just interrupted, but that didn’t change the sudden cringing sense of embarrassment that she felt. In fact, she felt almost guilty. She hadn’t even heard Fluttershy coming.

Fluttershy looked nervously at the note on the ground, then at Twilight and then anywhere but at Twilight. At last her eyes settled on a point on the horizon not far from the lowest hanging branch of the tree under which Twilight lay. She bit her lip and kicked the ground lightly with her right forehoof. Then there was silence into which the chirping of the crickets and the scuffing sound of Fluttershy’s hoof as it prodded at the turf sounded like a deafening cacophony.

Fluttershy seemed terrified, as though she wished she could be anywhere else but where she was at that moment. This only increased Twilight’s guilt. She had a good idea what had caused this awkwardness. She would have felt awkward too if she had been in Fluttershy’s position, but every time she opened her mouth to say what she had decided she would say, her throat tightened up just enough to prevent the words from coming out.

After a few more seconds, Fluttershy squeezed her eyes shut tightly, flicking her fringe over eyes with a jerk of her neck and let out a high-pitched whimper. She was clearly trying to say something that she was finding it very difficult to say and whatever it was didn’t feel like it could possibly end well.

Twilight held her breath, tears prickling behind her eyes as she watched the other pony struggling to bring herself to either speak or to fly away. After all of Twilight’s optimism only a few moments ago, she suddenly felt like a disaster was about to unfold. She had to be the one to speak before Fluttershy could find the words to end their chances of being together, but despite the urgency she felt, she too was afraid.

Fluttershy continued to whimper. Despite the fact that she couldn’t see the pegasus’ eyes, Twilight was sure that Fluttershy was on the verge of tears too. The almost-silence stretched on and on, with neither pony able to break it until at last, one of them managed to pluck up the courage to speak and, much to Twilight’s dismay, it wasn’t her.

“Can we talk?”

Author's Note:

At long last, and with many apologies for the delay.

Comments

[Maarad]

As long as you get the job done right, it doesnt matter how long it takes, and I must say this was worth the wait, good job

[Lily Gingertail]

And that my friends is what you call a prefect cliffhanger.
Great chapter looking forward to more.
~Tobben

[Harwick]

Very good build up! Eager to read what they have to say to each other...