It seems in hindsight that once I learned that bronies were actually a thing the damn things started showing up everywhere. My next run in with them happened about a week later I think.

I love tanks, so naturally I would love ‘world of tanks.’ a game that’s just 15 v 15 pvp tank battles of tanks from 1920-1970. I played it all the time, and still do. In this game my favorite tank is the M4A3E8 Sherman, or as it was affectionately called, the easy eight. The town next to mine has one as a memorial, which I suppose is why I have such a attachment to mine.

I was joining a match. And that’s when I saw it. On the other team.

[MLP] Rainbow_Dash20%
[MLP]thegreatnpowerfultrixie

It was on. I had been on the internet enough to know MLP was my little pony and rainbow dash was rainbow dash. I knew these bastards were bronies. And I knew what I was going to do. I was going to hunt them down and blow them away. There was no way, not on my game, that I was going to allow this to happen.

The tanks set up and the half minute prebattle started. A myrad of speeches ran through my mind.

“There will come a time when the courage of men fails, but it is not this day…”

“We will fight in the streets, we will fight in the cities, we will never surrender…”

“we’re not just gonna shoot the bastards, we’re gonna cut out their living guts and use them to grease the treads of our tank!”

“good luck all and have fun!”

What?

That interruption came from the chat. [MLP] Rainbow_Dash20% just said that. I didn’t respond.

Rainbow and Trixie were working as a scout-artillery combo team. Rainbow drove a T-50, a tank that could do 72 kph easy, and was only there to spot us so that Trixie could drop his shells down on us. I had to kill Rainbow first.

The match started, and I immediately broke left. I scanned ahead. My goal was to hit the high ground and then watch the field, also keeping my eye on the flank, making sure Rainbow couldn’t get around our side. Then I saw it.

A t-50 was screaming across the field, already about half across. I swung my turret around. I only had time for one shot, unaimed. I fired on the move.

I hit, and I hit hard. Right in the ammunition rack. The T-50 exploded instantly, rainbow dash scattered to bits as the tank ground to a halt.

“ammo rack?” Rainbow asked.

“F*** YES!” I responded.

“alright, good job. Ill wait back in the garage for you Trixie.” Then she left.

I played a hell of a game, my rapid firing 76 mm gun taking out a M6, two Panzer IV’s, and a Sherman Jumbo. 5 kills out of fifteen, not bad. But Trixie was still left. I screamed toward the spot were artillery usually hides. A shell flew out of the forest and whizzed by my turret, and 6 seconds later Trixie was dead.

“Goddamn incompetent noob team! You all F***ing suck” Trixie screamed. How rude. The match ended.

For a moment I sat there. I had won. Tons of medals, but most importantly I beat the bronies. I felt like a million bucks. I wasn’t going to lose world of tanks to them. Then I started thinking about it.

Rainbow dash and Trixie were pretty regular guys. That concerned me. Regular guys couldn’t like MLP. Right?

Despite my efforts ‘World of Tanks’ fell to the bronies a week later. They held a contest on world of tanks for a propaganda poster. The winner was a picture of an orange pony kicking an artillery shell, “BUCK’EM UP” inscribed on the bottom. It was time to fall back to a stronger position, safe from the influence of MLP.

Guns.

2084361 Did you do so good because there was righteous fury burning inside you, or would you do so good anyway because you are good at it?

2086868 well, I am going to say that I am so good at it, because I am.
but I will also say this.
a M4A3E8 cannot one shot a T-50 unless it hits the ammo rack and destroys it. if you only damage it nothing happens. the fact that I one shotted a T-50 going flat out with a unaimed shot was divine intervention, plain and simple.