What happened · 9:28pm Jan 9th, 2022
I usually put posts and story's through grammerly first to make it easier for people to read but for this blog post I'm not gonna do that since I wanna be as raw as possible.
I should probably tell you all what's been going on. At the end of October 2021 my best friend who was like a younger brother to me decided to end our friendship due to some stuff that I don't feel comfortable going into. Anyways this fucked me up severely mentally to the point where I'd didn't want to be alive anymore. I was planning on taking my own life around 2 weeks after the event happened but thankfully plans didn't go through since my close friends (who I'll wish I could name) caught wind about what happened and came over to my place to see if I was okay. Which helped a lot since it made me feel loved and cared for. As 2021 progressed my mental health started to decline severely where I honestly didn't want to get better since I didn't feel like I deserved it which leads us to yesterday. I was on Instagram scrolling through my page when I thought about talking to him. That's when I found out he blocked me. Once again my heart was crushed since I felt like honestly I was an awful friend. Wanna also quickly mention that I had been working on that FanFic for a few day before posting it and most of the time I use it as a way to cope with my depression and anxiety which was no different here except I was planning on taking my own life shortly after that was posted. Thankfully that plan didn't go through since after what all you've amazing people have shown me, I'm loved more than I think. Words cannot describe I am for not only everyone who was worried about along with telling why to keep going, but to also the people who called to see if I was okay. I do feel a gilty for causing such a big scene in this community but I just wanna say how thankful I am for all of you for seeing if I was still alive.
I'm sorry that happened to you. I can't even imagine what that felt like. I'm glad you're ok.
Just know there'll always be people here for you, people who love you. Take good care of yourself ok?
Hey~
I know we have never talked with each other before, and I cannot say that I know how you must've felt going through all that. But the fact that you held on shows you're stronger than you think~
And I know it's probably easy for me to say, but please hang in there, alright? Just by doing so, you're going to make people be happy. There's probably more people who, like me, never really talked much, but know that we are also here, wanting you to stay alright. We hope things will be better in your life~
Glad to hear that you're doing better!
Aww, awesome to hear doing far better! Hope it'll stay that way, and remaIn so.
No need to feel guilty, we're all here to help and support, those who came here either to pop in a quick check in or say something for you, did it with their own heart and will, there's no reason to feel guilty about it, bud.
Now stay safe and as happy as can be
Hey, I'm sorry all of this stuff has happened to you. But we're here to make sure you can get through the tough times. I get that you probably need some space, but I wanted to acknowledge that I'd seen this and say I'm glad that nothing happened. *hugs*