Hello · 3:27am Jun 27th, 2020
Hello all!
I thought I should write a little about me and why I have decided to publish my stories. This may be a little long, but thank you for taking the Tim to read this.
It all started in 2006 with the release of High school musical. for lack of a better saying, I was obsessed with it. that's when I found fan fiction that was on YouTube, and then the fan fiction website. I tried my hand at those and began to upload to YouTube. unfortunately, I fell off because of being ridiculed constantly from my older brother. However, I kept writing. I had many stories fill my computer, but I never posted again. I stopped completely when the computer crashed and all my files were lost.
During this time, I began to notice things about myself in my everyday life. When I had moved into high school a few years later, I met my best friend at the time in the tenth grade. We were two weirdos, so we got along and became close insanely quickly. It wasn't long before I began to think about her a lot, and by the next year, I found that I was excited and happy anytime we went off by ourselves during our lunch hour.
When I got my first job, I used to talk about her with one of my close coworkers (who was gay), and one day she asked me if I was gay. To this day, I still remember my response: "NO!...I don't know."
After that, the question would cross my mind every time I hung out with my friend. I never realized how comfortable we were with each other; I'd have her sit on my lap, I tickled her mercilessly, even reached down her shirt for a pack of skittles.
Long story short, nothing came about it, and she's since started a family with her boyfriend, but we had talked once and I think we both knew there was something there.
College and my second Job. I began to become serious in my christian faith, and began to write off my high school days as just that; high school days. I even met I guy at work that I really liked (and still do), and I began to lock away what I had thought at that time to be a one time experience. It all came crashing back when we had a new hire and I began to talk about her as much as I talked about the guy. I liked her too.
This was around the time I started with the MLP franchise and Applejack and Rarity caught my attention from Look Before You Sleep. I was hooked, and my passion for writing was ignited. The more I watched, the more I fell in love with their relationship and dynamic, and the more I wrote. The Sleepover was the first story I had go beyond 10K words. That was the final red flag for me and I began to seriously look inside myself.
After wrestling with my thoughts for months, I finally accepted that I am bisexual. The self-admission both relieved me and nearly sent me into a panic. I am bisexual in a family of christians. My mother is very devout, and her and my siblings constantly voice their unsupportive opinions on those of the LGBT+ community. As of right now, I have only come out to 4 of my coworkers whom I love and trust. I feel that I can't come out to my current best friend because she is a catholic, and I am not even considering telling my family.
The MLP universe and its fanfics are my outlet. I find reprieve when I write and I giggle like a child when I watch (I can't tell you how many times I have watched Rollercoaster of Friendship). I decided to post my stories, hoping to give others the good feelings that I get from this universe.
It sucks that I have to keep a part of me hidden, but I am okay with that; at least for now. For me, this is enough, and I hope you all continue to enjoy the side of me that very few people have witnessed.
I can't pretend to understand how bumpy of a journey that all must've been, but I can definitely appreciate your courageousness. It takes genuine strength to be willing to examine oneself, let alone come to terms with all of who we are as individuals. Whatever the results with others, always take solace in the fact that YOU have accepted yourself. In a world as myopic and hateful as this one, it's one of the greatest achievements anyone can claim, and nobody can take that away from you.
Speaking as someone who also aims to inspire feelings through their work, it's always encouraging to meet a fellow writer who shares in that goal, be it with regards to MLP or whatever. So long as you follow that passion and continue to enjoy it, keep writing, keep growing, and keep up the good work!