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maydayz


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  • 276 weeks
    Cupcakes....With Plushies!!!!

    Written by Calibra2.
    -------

    ~Stretches hind hooves in a groggy daze, walking downstairs.~


    : Oi! All I ask is that somepony around here puts on a fresh pot of brew everynow and again!!!

    Read More

    1 comments · 170 views
Apr
7th
2016

Cupcakes....With Plushies!!!! · 7:00am Apr 7th, 2016

Written by Calibra2.
-------

~Stretches hind hooves in a groggy daze, walking downstairs.~


: Oi! All I ask is that somepony around here puts on a fresh pot of brew everynow and again!!!

~Blinks in long lashes softly, "Stuffed Toys" sits beside a day old cup of coffee, DC licks her lips gently.~

: Surely it's good? I mean look it has a decent presentation. Nopony has really messed with it.

~Slowly sneaks up on both items, kneeling before them, ears folded back.~

: How bad could they be?

~ Horn flashes to life, levitating the cup to her lips, taking a long swig of the brew. Eyes slowly widening afterwards, the cup lowering down ever so swiftly.~

: Oh No...

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: Welcome to the show Mother-Buckers!

No I apologize.

My name is Decaf Coffee. I'm here to review every story on this site!!- Crazy no?

Well I will! I do not care how long it takes, I will read and review every story, from the good to the not so good.

I won't skimp out on the razzle-dazzle too. So expect a skit like above with all my reviews.

I'd like to thank NCMares for allowing me to use some of his art in upcoming fics of mine as well as a avatar.

On that subject if anypony would ever want to draw my Oc DC, I'd do a Story trade for one!- Any subject and up to 15 chapters. I prefer not to do clop though.

Anyway me just slaming you in the face with shite is over, let us get into the review.

This will be a review in progress. The story is not complete and so I will give my thoughts, on what is written so far.

These are my opinions , so if you don't like them, why are you even reading this?

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Stuffed Toys deals with a odd family, moving to Ponyville being odd, they give odd vibes and act odd in the eyes of ponies who in turn treat them odd.

That got old fast huh?

Welcome to the show then. The first chapter feels like a broken record, being very repetitive in detail. Though the author does try at least, the detail with the ponies are ok. Yet everything around them just feels paper thin.

Not a lot of detail to the background which is a shame in a horror fic. The word Odd is used a lot, more than it should be. Beating you over the head that this family is indeed a bunch of psychopaths.

I feel this heavy hoof approach ruins the pacing of the story from the start. Moving on to deeper into the fic. Mom and Dad pony of this new family come off loving at first and their daughter is the simple character model of being playfull and just sweet as can be.

Mommy and Daddy on the other hoof come across with a dark secret, They enjoy making plushies out of ponies. Hence moving from town to town I'm guessing. They do this so they can give their daughter new toys...I guess.

Yep nothing " Odd" about receiving dolls that look like your species. Heck if I was given a human plushie that looked like my friends, I'd say thanks for the voo-doo doll and be on my merry way.

I hope you like in your face diabolic characters! This story slides into torture porn fairly quickly. The antagonists and I use that term loosely ,come off as cartoon villains in this story.

They mock their first victim to no end, roughly beating and cutting open the poor pony in what could be considered an attempt to cash in on "Cupcakes" shock factor.

Which in that story it was kind of cartoony itself, but here we have a new level of antics! After reading the bloody death of a filly, I didn't feel scared I felt bored. It wasn't done with any real merit and falls flat.

At the end of the day this is what "Stuffed Toys" tries to be. A spiritual successor to "Cupcakes." Though just writen a bit more poorly. And Cupcakes was already not something polished so...yeah.

---

So I'm giving this fic a hard time. Is it all bad?

I can say at the moment.

No.

" But DC! You just said how bad it was!" I hear you all screaming at the screen.

No the main premise is bad-ish.

The characters and by that I mean, The filly character is written fairly well.

Her scenes are evenly paced and to be honest fairly sweet. If the author cut out the horror plot and wrote about this child trying to fit in, Hell I'd say this was a winner.

But sadly we are given just a cliche piece of fiction, the tale has spelling mistakes, pacing is off and detail is lacking.

But characters are well done, story is ok I guess, it has promise just falls flat. The plot is paper thin and kind of hazy too.

If you are into B-Movies of B-movies. I say read this story. It's no Cupcakes but it will get your blood gore fix satisfied I promise. I feel the story might have worked better as a Mystery and could have been more subtle.

But this is the Author's first story.

I'm willing to cut Him/Her some slack for what it is. The story is ok.

If it were a coffee, it would be drinkable. Just very bitter.

At the moment I'm giving this fic a 5/10 and willing to follow this to the end.

I'll update the review as it continues.

Until then I'll just be here, drinking day old coffee.

~Lifts up the mug and takes another long sip, cringing a little.~

Mmmmmmm.....Chunky.


To Be Continued.

Report maydayz · 170 views · #Stuffed toys #Oc #Horror #Gore.
Comments ( 1 )

I think this review would be improved immensely by removing the skit at the beginning. Stick with what's important and make the review itself engaging to read rather than trying to weave your own cringe-inducing narrative.

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