*Alert* Invasion Imminent *Alert*

Hey there my caffeins! Holy shit that was horrible. I think I need to go wash my mouth out with dish detergent after just typing that. Discord! I need my brain bleach! No, the other brain bleach! I think I need a new No. 8 assistant. Either way I was here to te-

Oh my gosh! I finally get to talk to all my fans! *Squee!*

Pinkie! What are you doing here? ...And did you actually just type out 'squee'?

I sure diddly dood! Or I sure diddly dood did done! But after Rainbow Dash came over to SCC (Sugar Cube Corner) and told me about how she got to talk to the Eentargnat, I got my Eentargnat antenna installed and I can detect when you are on the Eentargnat! Isn't it so awesome! Hi guys!

Back up one teensy tiny sec. First of all it's spelled Internet, and second of all, how did you acquire and install a wifi antenna? Not to mention, Dash was supposed to keep it a secret.

Oh you know Dash, she's not the best at keeping secrets. But please please please don't be mad at her. She only told me and I didn't tell anypony. Promise.

Do you Pinkie Promise?

Uh, well about that. You see, I kinda sorta a little bit maybe told a fe-

WHERE ARE THE HUMANS?!

Lyra! You're not supposed to be here!

Ooh what is that beep boop machine? And where are the humans? Pinkie promised humans.

Why do I put up with you ponies? Wel-

Because we're absolutely adorable and you love us?

You know me too well Pinkie. Especially considering the fact that this is the first time we ever really talked. But first of all, this 'beep boop' machine is called a computer. Specifically a laptop. I press things on this here keyboard and things appear on the screen. Go talk to Twilight, I don't get paid for this shit. Basically, I type things here and then the humans get to see them.

Really? That is so sweet! What are the humans like? Are they tall or short? Are they really bipedal? Can they-

Why don't I just show you a picture? If you want more answers just go talk to Twilight. Here they are; humans in all their glory.

OMG THATS- Actually not what I envisioned them looking like. Well they still are like the perfect race right? I can't let looks get in the way.

Perfect race... Hehe. Ha. Haha. HahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Perfect race?! War. That is all. Now shoo. I have important writing stuff to do. Discord! What's taking the bleach so long?!