Because You Can Not Shoot Words

I'm the type of guy who went in for a degree in literature, but halfway through thought it was a better idea to serve the country. I soon found myself given a M249 light machine gun and fell in love with the shoulder pain. Now what do I do when I find myself sitting at home and not on base in Iraq? Watching colorful ponies and reading a few good books. When I ran out of books my daughter pointed me here. What to do now? I think that is obvious.