Epilogue
In a world not unlike our own, there were two humans. They lived peaceably in a comfortable home just outside of a small town. Each had much to give to the other, and each had much to learn from the other as well. Their days were bright and happy.
Elsewhere, a cosmic vagabond ran away from fate in his little blue box, but eventually the drums of his doom would reach him, and they would overtake him, just as the horse of Death’s four hoofbeats pound for us all.
In a distant, wonderfully blessed land there lived six individuals who shared deep bonds of friendship. But as always, there would be trials that would strengthen those friends' bonds in the days to come.
Not too far off was one left all by herself. She had many sad days ahead of her in remembering the days gone by with the loss of one of her most dear friends, but she would find solace even in the ever changing world around her.
In a secluded corner of the world, a disgraced stallion of learning pondered. His stubbornness had nearly brought about an end to all, and the guilt was almost too much to bear. He spent his days seeking purpose, as painful memories from long ago and recent history crowded in.
In a large city there lived an entertainer with a heart of gold. Though her dream had been ravaged by the hooves of another, she struggled to rebuild it, and in the coming months she would provide happiness to many ponies with the gifts she offered.
An equally humbled heart was to be found in the Princess of the Sun, who now concerted more and more of her thought and efforts with her wise sister, the Princess of the Night. Their mutual bond of trust was never greater than now.
A certain wall-eyed Pegasus deserves mention, as it seems that recent events required the position of Chief Royal Science Officer be filled by worthier hooves. She spends her days laboring for the good of others, but now she does it without recrimination or prejudice.
For one being there was now rest. A consciousness that had agonized over the safe-being of all was now at peace, and she reveled in the paradise her children helped to create. She was given a vessel in which to reside, so that her children might readily seek her council at any time.
And far, far below the shining capitol city, deep in the bowels of the former dungeons, there was a chamber; a chamber that could only be accessed by those of calm mind, for those with unharmonious thoughts could very well unwittingly unleash the maelstrom that waited therein. Within that chamber was a seemingly innocuous stone statue, but those who were observant could see a recent change in the shape of that statue, and they might shudder, for what had been expression of terror on the stone chimera’s face was now an upturned smile. Yes, everything had gone better than planned. The danger now being averted, the game could continue, and his turn would come again soon.
THE END
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I posted chapters on the wrong day and no one can stop me! Bwahahahahaha!
Well, this is it. A Journey Unthought Of is complete
Thank you readers, each and every one for your comments and your favorites! I hope you've enjoyed reading this as much as I have writing it.
I hope to start posting character spotlights within about two months time or so, and the adventure will continue!
For now, peace
loved it. cant wait for the next story :D i hope there is one...
1041634
Oh there is! I'm not out of this yet. This was actually my first ever finished story of any kind, and it certainly won't be the last!
This was simply beautiful. A work of art from start to finish, and I'm glad I stuck around for it. Truly this was a story filled with emotion, truth, and beauty.
1042954
t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTgIvwCXdEXtRqtd93CyRHswI_qBR4Cxo3BF7Yfj1hR7Libcy0f
You really do give me to much credit, but thank you all the same!
Amazing this is one of the best story I read!!!
Well done!
1043309
Thank you! You've been here since the beginning of it all, and I'm glad you've really enjoyed it!
I absolutely loved this story. Perfect way to end it.
1054965
I'm so glad you liked it! Thanks for reading!
Hey guys! I just wanted to let you all know the first chapter for the first appendix to AJUO, The Maiden and the Serpent, is now up. If you enjoyed this story, I have a feeling you'll like this new one too. Have a fantastic day everyone!
Meh I'm indecisive. Should I be flaming mad or congratulatory. I love the story but hate the ending =(
endings... the bane of the reader. This one is a prime example of my least favorite type of endings. The biggest problem is separation I hate endings that separate friends from one another it's really cruel. The second biggest problem is that it is an End. Meaning no more adventures for our main characters. They just live out the rest of their boring lives in a boring place. True love and friendship is born through adventure because adventure is a series of different events that expose and force you to show and see sides of other people and yourself. And it thrives off of continued adventure.
1437933
I'm glad that you liked my story! I'm also glad that you put some serious thought and explained why you didn't like the ending. It's true, the ending is bittersweet. But the best part about is that it is an end for now, not the end. I'm currently writing some appendices for A Journey Unthought of, and one of them down the road will deal with how Adam and Lyra are adjusting to living in our world together. And after that comes the sequel I've had knocking around in my head for a while!
1438218 will stay tuned for the sequel in Equestria. I'm not a fan of EoE's (Equines on Earth) even if she's not physically an equine.
1645616
Thanks for letting me know about that! Hope you enjoy the rest of the story!
Wow!^_^
Great fic here!^_^
Really good writing!^_^
1646489
Thanks a lot! I'm working on some appendices right to this story, and once I'm done with those you can expect a sequel!
This review is brought to you on behalf of the group: Authors Helping Authors
Please note this might have spoilers
This review is of the first ten chapters
Name of Story: A Journey Unthought of: A man's life in Equestria
Grammar score out of 10 (1 is grammar that needs to be worked upon as basic principles such as capitalization and spelling is an issue, and 10 is impeccable):
Grammar is not my strong suit, but I'll still you my score: I'll give you a 6/10.
- Why is half of a sentence on one line and the rest under it? If this was a book, I can understand why its like this due to lack of space but whether you did this on purpose or whatever word program you're using did it, this needs to change. This is mostly in the first chapter.
- On the plus side, beside chapter one. The others look ok, no walls of text at lease.
Pros
1.A good start for a HiE story
2.Most of the ponies look to be in character.
3.Bon Bon back-story
4.How both parties [Adam and Ponies] swap info about each others universes
Cons
1.Confused about whether this is a 1st or 3rd person story.
2.The whole bit when Adam thinks dragons and hydras are not real.
3.How Adam can read Luna's mind.
Notes Section (how you can improve your fic, at the very least an elaboration of Pros and Cons section)
Most of the pro's speak for themselves.
Compere to other HiE stories that are on here, yours is a good start and paced well.
So, the cons:
1. This one is really off putting, most of the time I can see it being a 1st person story, then I have to do a second look at what I just read to make sure I read it right. If this is a 1st person story, he got knocked out he doesn't know what happens to him between the time he's knocked out to the time he wakes up. If he got told then it would make sense but the read needs to know if he did get told.
2.
ok, this would work if he thought that he was thinking that he is on his own earth, but he is not due to fact that he just fell from space.
3. I'm willing to believe that Luna can read minds because she is an alicorn and while in some non-pony stories I had read about where the person who is reading your mind and you can read theirs, but here it doesn't work. Now I'm willing to believe that if Adam could do that, then he could only read what's on her mind at that moment, not drive through memories. maybe you should of just had Twilight give him a brief history lesson of what happen with Luna and the aftermath.
Sorry if this review sound a bit harsh, but this is just my own opinion, you don't have to take it if you don't want to.
Story I want you to read: From My World To Theirs
1979135
First and foremost, thank you very much, Mr. Scribe, for reviewing a portion of my story.
Another thing I am extremely grateful for is your alerting me to the egregious formatting on the first chapter. I have never seen the formatting on any of my stories become this wonky, and let me assure you it did not look like this when I posted it initially! I'm guessing the slight modification to the website a couple months ago may have had something to do with this, and I do deeply appreciate you pointing out this error to me!
In relation to the constantly shifting perspective from 1st to 3rd person, I do understand and acknowledge your complaint; it is a valid one! When I first wrote this story, it was much easier for me to write it as if I was Adam and these were my memoirs. I also, however, wanted to enhance on the story's background and environment, which could not have as easily done while locked in a 1st person perspective. If I were writing it now it probably would be different, but I think part of the charm of AJUO is that it focuses on not only one being as the primary protagonist, but also focuses on the secondary protagonists and the antagonists as well for a chance to world build through different perspectives.
Now, hydras and dragons. Up until the time that Adam physically sees Lyra and Bon Bon for the first time, the majority of the time he has been in Equestria he has been unconscious. He had several seconds of falling through tree branches from the sky above, and the chance to look around Lyra and Bon Bon's cottage. Based on those perceptions alone, he could have easily thought he were teleported to a heavily wooded place anywhere on Earth, rather than being teleported to another reality altogether.
Thank you once again for reviewing the first part of my story! I will be over to read your story shortly to review it for you.
100 total ratings?! Nearly 2,000 views?!
img.pandawhale.com/49095-screaming-reaction-gif--colber-KvOi.gif
Seriously, I can't believe this has all happened in the year since I finished posting this story! Thank you all so much you guys, you are all fantastic!
Have you been inspiered by a comic on youtub called "Heartstrings"? Becuse this kind of reminds me of that one.
3545437
I'm afraid not! I started writing this story in January of 2012, posting it here in March, and finished it in August of the same year. From the looks of it, Heartstrings started in April of 2013, and by that point I was working hard writing my sequel. What probably inspired me the most for this story was JasontheHuman's story Anthropology. It's a fantastic read!
3545539
Okay, then I know!
3545609
No worries mate!
th06.deviantart.net/fs71/PRE/i/2013/077/3/b/lyra_thumbs_up__vector__by_medyk44-d5cw6ka.jpg
*Grins and applauds* While I won't do you the disservice of saying this is flawless, it does have a lot of promise. It does have some very fascinating and beautiful ideas and pieces within. While it has rough spots it's still very enjoyable and I'll definitely be reading and enjoying more.
3686045
Thanks for being honest! At some point after I'm finished with the sequel, I plan to rewrite some of AJUO. Mostly it'll be to expand some scenes that went a little too quickly. If you have any suggestions or thoughts that might help, I'd love to hear them!
3811114
I figured I'd get around to rewriting this after I finished writing the sequel. Maybe you could give me a couple of hints or ideas on what I should focus on for a rewrite?
3881487 ...i made that comment 92 weeks ago and it was already answered...i have no idea what this story is about now....
3880539 Ah don't know what yer talkin' bout.
3881909
I appreciate the enthusiasm for my story! It's not often I get such a rabid commenter. All the same, a lot of people have commented at one point or another in the two years this has been up, some of which may not want to be bothered about something they don't remember. I'd love to continue hearing from you, but I don't know if other people want to, ok?
For the record, yes, I'm planning a rewrite when I'm done with the sequel. I appreciate your defense of my story, even in it's now substandard condition. I'd expect that since you're continuing to read that most of your previous questions and comments have been answered by me or the story. All the ponies are really ponies, and the humans are really humans. There's not all that many mind twists in this work. At least, not of the existential variety. If you could refrain from using sensitive words like nigga and rape in future comments, I'd deeply appreciate it. It's a rated Everyone story, so I hope we can keep the comment section the same from now on, if you please.
I like this story. Nice work, bro.
4263412
The magic of de-clawing negates this problem, so no worries!
This is just the first of many head injuries poor Adam will receive. The severity and frequency will get lampshaded somewhat eventually.
4443269
Do you mean change the name of the whole story for the Doctor? It'd probably garner more views, sure, but he's not the main character, so I dunno.
And I name dropped Billie Piper! REFERENCES!
5054081
You are potentially right. It's still up for debate among scientists about whether Brown Dwarves are very old stars or just objects that have no fuel to ignite and become a star, so for ease of understanding and for making the story work I chose the first hypothesis.
You helped me learn something new today, so thank you!
5054814
Actually, the brown dwarf classification contains both stars that fail to ignite, and white dwarfs that have sufficiently cooled.
5278006 indeed. i was beginning to think we wouldn't have an antagonist at all.
brilliant story my friend. loved it completely.
5278639
Thanks very much! If you're interested, I just finished the sequel to this story a few months back. If you're willing to read it, I'd love to read any comments you made on it.
AJUO: Revival of Chaos
Oh GOD DAMN IT!!!!!
5282918
Interesting reaction. Could you please explain?
5288265
Hello again, Jack! It's been half an eternity. How've you been?
6139235
Thanks for showing your interest in my story! I'm glad you're enjoying the revised version so far. Unfortunately I overestimated my ability to write multiple stories at once, and right now even one is difficult due to my work constantly giving me fifty-ish hour weeks. I hate it when people who are completing a project say this, and it galls me to say it too, but it'll be done soon. I don't want to promise anything right now for certain and then not be able to meet that goal, but my hope is that once the summer's over I can get this revision and the other story I'm working on done inside this year. It's a strange world when I have more free time during the school year than in summer!
6861012
Thanks for the well thought out responses! Admittedly a helmet is something I didn't consider, but which would make sense given the context provided. Let's just say it was thrown loose during his fall into the Everfree. The suit Adam was wearing isn't filled with sophisticated technology; it doesn't even have a life support system. It was a body tight set of clothing with insulation and a small amount of aluminum skeleton reinforcing it.
As for the mind rape allegation, Luna was only doing a cursory glance at first, which we would both agree is alright, but did probe deeper only after Adam consented to the act.
Now, when I imagine telepathic communication (again, my own personal interpretation) I think of it as a two-way street, much like any form of communication. What makes the telepath special is that they can form a nexus of communication, a server if you like, through which many minds can find instantaneous connection. Now, like computers, I think minds can recognize a foreign entity at work, back-trace the intruder, and break through their firewalls to learn about their invader. I'm not sure if this is a popular or well-known interpretation, but its what makes the most sense to me.
6869176
After the fiasco of putting this off for over a full year, I'm going to make sure this next batch gets done inside a few weeks. Hopefully it shouldn't be too long!
7393425
Well I'm certainly glad you're enjoying it! I'd hold tight: it's going to get bumpy!
Does the Doctor appear as a human or as a pony?
Why didn't you respond to my comment?
THIS STORY IS EPIC !!!!
7489919
I'm sorry that I missed you! I suppose in answer to your question the Doctor is absolutely genuinely a humanoid Time Lord. He only ever appeared as a pony due to some gadgetry.
7496662
Well I'm glad you think so! If you're interested you could check out the sequel; I'd like to think it's better quality than the original version of this story was.
7499200
My thought at least is that Lyra was more focused on the proto-pony initially because it was such a shock to her. In anthropology at least there's some precedent for humans believing our creators were warriors and divine savages, or that they didn't care about us or were annoyed with our existence after our creation. With ponies I'm more inclined to think that their mythology and spirituality, pre- and post-celestial, would lean towards their deity or deities benevolence and relatableness, rather than ambivalence or hostility. With that in mind, imagine that that positive idea is roughly and abruptly stripped away, exposed as a lie. Rejection could very well be the initial reaction, and denial ensues. While we have the luxury of time and separation to analyze the scene more closely, Lyra is stuck in the story with her own shattered preconceptions, and she's probably not in the most inductive of mindsets to think all the details through. You are on to something though, as not ever human was happy with the situation that arose when they created other cognizant species.