This chapter opens with a surprising display of humility from Theresa, who admits that she is just an eighteen year old kid who doesn’t know what she’s doing. Based on everything that we know so far, this is only included because the author is trying to deflect criticisms about his perfect little brainchild. Theresa also admits that not doing anything can be a mistake sometimes. Come to think of it, don’t you think that a lot of her problems from earlier in the book would have been solved if

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What a way to open a chapter that we have here! Theresa is being heaped with praise and love and admiration for her plan to create rain around the world. This strikes me personally as very strange, because the last time this happened a drunk from the slums and his family had to build an enormous ark, take two of every animal and ride out the flood without dying of starvation, dehydration, incest, unhygienic conditions, or just plain boredom. You’d think that a devout Catholic like Boutin would

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We're getting two chapters in one day because the last chapter was so damn pointless.

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This chapter opens with Theresa crying about the unfairness of the position that she’s in. Truthfully, she should be crying about how her own brashness and stupidity led to her being in the position that she’s in. She’s in a situation where no matter what she does, people will die. However, Theresa seems to fixate much more on how people will stop loving her no matter the outcome. We already know that she’s a callous, unfeeling, self-centered, myopic woman-child. We just never knew how much of

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After so very long, Theresa is finally going home to America, but not before tipping the butler ten million dollars (Scarecrow, I think I’ll miss you most of all). She and Steve hustle their way through the airport, Theresa keeping up her Karen act as she ignores all of the people who are praising her as she passes by them. She says that if they don’t like it, that’s too bad.

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We’re doing things a bit differently this week. Since this series of analyses can be done by Friday, we’re getting one chapter a day now, until the end of this literary travesty. Everyone ready? Let’s go.

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Here we are. Unlucky chapter thirteen. First thing in the morning, Theresa decides that she’s going to raise fifty-six water columns at the North Pole. She calls upon everyone in the house to gather around and watch the show that’s being broadcast on TV. She even calls in the family that is hosting her, who is so unimportant that they haven’t shown up between now and since they were introduced to the story. They’re so superfluous that Theresa doesn’t even want them as part of her planetwide

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