2553279

"Maybe we should scare her for amusement?" Wolf asks Colgate, a jokeful tone in his voice as he prepares to close his shell.

(Maybe a little kiss wouldn't hurt.)

2553306 Hehe, I like the way you think.*gives him a quick peck on his cheek* Just not too often. I don't want Filthy Rich complaining about my new roommate giving his daughter nightmares.

2553548

"The Silver one was merely curious, she deserved no punishment." Wolf replies bashfully as he waits for the unicorn to withdraw, and when she does , the Dalek closes his shell.

2553595 Silver Spoon is not really a problem. She is nice when she isn't around Diamond. She actually volunteers at my dentist office sometimes. Don't tell any pony this, but she is very lonely. That's the reason she hangs with Diamond. Her parents are gone a lot so she only has Diamond and her maid to keep her company. I help her as much as I can but its not enough. I just wish she would open up to others. *wipes a tear from her eyes*

2553689

"Perhaps I could help." Wolf suggests, a serene and gentle tone in his voice.

2553689

(Hi.)

2553704 What do you mean? How will you help her?

2556271

"Perhaps I can become her friend." Wolf responds. "She needs one to not be lonely."

2556271

(

)

2556320 Really? Thank you. Wolf, you are too kind. We'll go talk to her tommorow. *looks at Wolf* (Am I falling for Wolf? No, I can't. Even if I am, I don't know if he feels the same)

2562692

"What is wrong? You seem nervous." Wolf asks.

2562696 *gives him a smile* I'm OK. I'm just nervous about you meeting Celestia. After all, she is our ruler and you will have to meet her at some point. I just don't want to lose my new friend. Great here comes my cousin screwloose. I'll warn you now, she is a bit strange from being with Discord before he was reformed.

2562991

The Dalek stares at Screw loose.

2562994 Bark bark bark. Woof bark bark. No I haven't. Have you Wolf?

2563358

"What?"

2563369 Sorry. Forgot you can't understand her. She is looking for her daughter Screw ball. She was going to meet her here but she hasn't shown up yet. This is a picture of her. *reaches into her saddlebag* A real cutie huh?

2563402

The Dalek nods in agreement.

2563411 Ya, a bit crazy though, moreso than Pinkie. But she is a genius. She is the one who made Vinyl's Bass cannon and is trying to develope a device to turn non ponies into ponies, but she is missing something. She has nearly given up on it. Bark bark woof bark. Ok I'll keep an eye out for her and tell her your looking for her. *Screwloose runs off*

(Screwloose is way too easy to write.)

2563474

"Okay..." Wolf says uneasily.

(Gilda returning and Wolf becoming angry. It'll show that his still very prone to hate and anger.)

2563490 (oh she will show up. Trust me, there will be bashing.)
I should probably introduce you COLGATE! Great she found us. Hello Screwball. Your mother is looking for you. I know. I was with daddy looking for her. Ohhhhh hello Mr squidy, how are you?
(As I type this, the Doctor Who episode Dalek started playing. Strange isn't it?)

2564254

(Yes. Also, what a coincidence!)

"Good."

2564350 Hummm, Interesting design for an outer shell. With a few modifications I could give you a form shift attachment to make you able to turn your real form into *gasp* Hey look cupcakes! *takes off running* Now do you see what I mean by crazy. Let's get you to Mayor Mare for your introduction. The party will start soon.

(I always figured since Screwball was Discords daughter, she would get his intelligence as well as his affinity for chaos.)

2564739

"I obey." Wolf responds as he follows Colgate.

(That's fine by me.)

2564761 Hey Wolf, I'm worried that Princess Celestia will send you back home. Ever since I meet you, I have felt a bond between us. I'm not sure what it is yet, but its telling me that if you left I would be missing something. I just don't know what to do. *tears start forming*

2581445

"It will not happen... But even so, we barely know of one another." Wolf responds, curious as to how a bond can form so quickly.

2581486 *wipes tears away* Sorry about that. I'm just worried. And even though we just met earlier, I tendto make bonds with others because of my past. I'm sorry if I made this awkward. (Mayor) Hello Colgate. This must be the newest resident of our town Bad Wolf. Its nice to meet you. *holds out hoof*

(Sorry about the long wait before)

2582476

(I had to go to sleep, sorry.)

"Greetings." Wolf responds as he uses his sucker arm to shake the Mayor's hoof.

2584503 (Mayor) Let me be the first to say welcome and I hope you enjoy our great town. Why don't you come with me so we can get the official documents for you to become a full citizen of Equestria. After that all you need is Princess Celestia's signature and seal.

2584639

"I obey." Wolf responds as he follows Mayor Mare.

2584646 *time skip* (Mayor) Now that these are filled out, we just need to wait for authentication from one of the Princesses. It should be done before the end of tommorow if Ditzy is willing to leave after this meeting. Now do you have a place to stay for the night? If you don't we can find somewhere for you. You can leave and return to your party as soon as we're done.

2585689

"The home of the toothpaste unicorn." Wolf says, unintentionally making a pun out of Colgate's name.

2585885 (Mayor) Colgate? Be careful Wolf. She hasn't had a roommate since Lyra and Bon Bon moved to Canterlot. Everypony knows she puts on a strong face, but she misses them. Now let's get back to the party. *gets a far off look* I feel that after this week every thing will change here in town, and you will be at the center of it all. For better or worse. You alone must decide. *re focuses* I'm sorry, did you say something.

(Plot twist. And no I won't tell what it means. Spoilers.)

2589449

"You mentioned changes in the town. That I will be at the center of these changes. That I must decide alone. Have you seen the future?" Wolf asks, intrigued greatly.

2589466 I don't remember saying any of that. And I don't think so, I mean my great grandmother was psychic. But it never happened to any pony else in my family. Let's just forget this happened OK? *walks out of her office with Wolf following* (elsewhere) Sister, have you heard the news of a strange creature in Ponyville? No I haven't Luna. I shall investigate tommorow.

2589741

"You seem to have inherited that ability. I will repeat what you said." Wolf breaths in and then says:

"I feel that after this week every thing will change here in town, and you will be at the center of it all. For better or worse. You alone must decide."

2589777 Even if that's true, can you keep it a secret? Psychics aren't that common or well liked. the only one that was well-known and liked was Starswirl the bearded. I'll just get out your hair.*leaves* Hey Wolf. How did your meeting go?

2589978

"Good." Wolf responds. "However, the mayor believes that there will be many changes in this town in the weeks that I am here. I will be at the center of all of them, and I alone must make decisions." Wolf says.

(When will Gilda show up? To get under Wolf's skin, she'll need to be rude to Colgate.)

2589978

(Poke.)

2589997 *They hear the sound of wings flapping*(?) Well What do we have here? Its Toothpaste head . And whats this? A new play thing? I bet you have a real good time at night with that thing. Hahahahaha Leave us alone Gilda. Nopony invited you. Just leave! (Gilda) Not on your like dweab. I'm here to see Dash and find out if she has come to her seances about you all. Now BACK OFF. *shoves Colgate into a mud puddle* Hahahaha. Ya roll in the mud like the whorse you are. Leave me alone. You do this every time you come here. *Runs off with tears flowing from her eyes*

2590375

Wolf starts shaking. He had actually managed to absorb the internet earlier. He glares at Gilda and says:

You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As we say in Texas, you couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions printed on the heel. You are a canker, an open wound. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You took your last vacation in the Islets of Langerhans.

You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, and a weasel. I take that back; you are a festering pustule on a weasel's rump. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.

I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. You are a technicolor yawn. And did I mention that you smell?

You are a squeaking rat, a mistake of nature and a heavy-metal bagpipe player. You were not born. You were hatched into an unwilling world that rejects the likes of you. You didn't crawl out of a normal egg, either, but rather a mutant maggot egg rejected by an evil scientist as being below his low standards. Your alleged parents abandoned you at birth and then died of shame in recognition of what they had done to an unsuspecting world. They were a bit late.

Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it ever so much more rapidly. If cluelessness were crude oil, your scalp would be crawling with caribou.

You are a thick-headed trog. I have seen skeet with more sense than you have. You are a few bricks short of a full load, a few cards short of a full deck, a few bytes short of a full core dump, and a few chromosomes short of a full human. Worse than that, you top-post. God created houseflies, cockroaches, maggots, mosquitos, fleas, ticks, slugs, leeches, and intestinal parasites, then he lowered his standards and made you. I take it back; God didn't make you. You are Satan's spawn. You are Evil beyond comprehension, half-living in the slough of despair. You are the entropy which will claim us all. You are a green-nostriled, crossed eyed, hairy-livered, goisher kopf, inbred trout-defiler. You make Ebola look good.

You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot. You are not ANSI compliant and your markup doesn't validate. You have a couple of address lines shorted together. You should be promoted to Engineering Manager.

Do you really expect your delusional and incoherent ramblings to be read? Everyone plonked you long ago. Do you fantasize that your tantrums and conniption fits could possibly be worth the $0.000000001 worth of electricity used to send them? Your life is one big W.O.M.B.A.T., and your future doesn't look promising either. We need to trace your bloodline and terminate all siblings and cousins in order to cleanse humanity of your polluted genes. The good news is that no normal human would ever mate with you, so we won't have to go into the sewers in search of your git.

"You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a loathsome disease, a drooling inbred cross-eyed toesucker. You make Quakers shout and strike Pentecostals silent. You have a version 1.0 mind in a version 6.13 world. Your mother had to tie a pork chop around your neck just to get your dog to play with you. You think that www.GuyMacon.com/flame.html is the name of a rock band. You believe that P.D.Q. Bach is the greatest composer who ever lived. You prefer L. Ron Hubbard to Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle. Hee-Haw is too deep for you. You would watch test patterns all day if the other inmates would let you."

"On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. Spammers look down on you. Phone sex operators hang up on you. Telemarketers refuse to be seen in public with you. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go. May you choke on your own foolish opinions. You are a Pusillanimous galactophage and you wear your sister's training bra. Don't bother opening the door when you leave - you should be able to slime your way out underneath. I hope that when you get home your mother runs out from under the porch and bites you."

"You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock. You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You clouted boggish foot-licking half-twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You gormless crook-pated tosser. You bloody churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You cockered bum-bailey poofter. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You dread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill. You jetere steatopygous pilgarlick hircine whigmaleerious rhadamanthine lintlicker. I refer you to the reply given in the case of Arkell v. Pressdram."

"You are so clueless that if you dressed in a clue skin, doused yourself in clue musk, and did the clue dance in the middle of a field of horny clues at the height of clue mating season, you still would not have a clue. If you were a movie you would be a double feature; _Battlefield_Earth_ and _Moron_Movies_II_. You would be out of focus."

"You are a fiend and a sniveling coward, and you have bad breath. You are the unholy spawn of a bandy-legged hobo and a syphilitic camel. You wear strangely mismatched clothing with oddly placed stains. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just knowing that you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away. You are jetsam who dreams of becoming flotsam. You won't make it. I beg for sweet death to come and remove me from a world which became unbearable when the bioterrorists designed you."

"It is hard to believe how incredibly stupid you are. Stupid as a stone that the other stones make fun of. So stupid that you have traveled far beyond stupid as we know it and into a new dimension of stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid cubed. Trans-stupid stupid. Stupid collapsed to a singularity where even the stupons have collapsed into stuponium. Stupid so dense that no intelligence can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot summer day on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one minute than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. It cannot be possible that anything in our universe can really be this stupid. This is a primordial fragment from the original big stupid bang. A pure extract of stupid with absolute stupid purity. Stupid beyond the laws of nature. I must apologize. I can't go on. This is my epiphany of stupid. After this experience, you may not hear from me for a while. I don't think that I can summon the strength left to mock your moronic opinions and malformed comments about boring trivia or your other drivel. Duh."

"The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away most of your of what you wrote, because, well ... it didn't really say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame was pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us "normal" people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are "challenged" persons in this world who find these things to be difficult. If I had known that this was true in your case then I would have never have exposed myself to what you wrote. It just wouldn't have been "right." Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you."

"P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, EDLINoid, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dyspeptic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive, mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, pinguid, and Generally Not Good."

I hope this helps...."

(Everypony hears that.)

2590444 (Holy Celestia dude. When you rant, you rant. I am Speachless.)

2590444 (Gilda) Holy buck dude. What the buck is your problem? I did nothing to you that would cause you to say that.

2590532
2590543

When Wolf speaks, there is nothing but hate. "YOU ARE A DISGUSTING WASTE OF SPACE THAT IS BETTER OFF DEAD FOR VULTURES!"

2590577 Wolf?

2590615

Wolf ignores her as he tells Gilda, "You half breed filth are impure and on the food chain should be below bacteria!"

2593214 Wolf please stop. Your scaring me.

2593406

"You should be exterminated!" Wolf shouts at Gilda.

2593418 WOLF. Stop this. Look at her. *Gilda curls up into a ball* (Gilda) Don't hurt me don't hurt me don't hurt me. She is broken and afraid of you.

2593470

"Transferring energy to weaponry! EXTERMINATE, EXTERMINATE, EXTERMINATE!" Wolf shouts as he pumps energy into his gun stick, slowly breaking through the Doctor's adjustments.

2593472 Wolf stop! *runs in front of him* This isn't you. You are not like this.*tears keep flowing* Please stop. Your scaring everypony. You're acting like a MONSTER. *falls to the ground* Just stop please.