A Very Spoiler-Tastic Review of MLP Season Eight, Episode Three, "The Maud Couple"

I honestly thought for a moment that this was who she was going to fall for. The episode kinda made a joke related to it, but I guess it was ultimately never meant to be...

Happy Easter and merry April Fools Day! May the Mighty Bunny grant you the gift of many candy-filled eggs.

First off, we got us a NEW GORK-BLESSED INTRO! AND IT TOTALLY SHIPS EMBER AND THORAX TOGETHER! I KNOW THIS, 'CAUSE OF DA WAY DEY LOOK WHEN DEY'S IS FLYIN' TOGEVVER! I KNEW IT! HEHEHEHEHAAAAAHAHAHAAA!!!

But seriously, this here episode is technical. Very technical. It's about revelations. It is The Maud Couple; otherwise known as the episode in which Starlight Glimmer reveals that she doesn't have a closet. Because Twilight Sparkle is a cheapskate and can't afford to give her chiefest slave favorite student one.

The episode starts off with Maud physically maiming some folks at a local bar with her racist, or rock-related jokes. After the two leave the joint, Pinkie realizes that Maud hasn't been spending time with her all that often as of late. With her birthday coming up real soon, Maud agrees to spend some time with Pinkie. Pinkie cuts to the next morning and sees that Maud is... GONE.

So Pinkie goes on a hunt for her Maud, trekking across literal countries and dimensions in search of her sister. She eventually comes to Pony!Sango's in her search for Maud, reveals that detail I mentioned earlier about her not having a closet, and decides to allow the former communist to look for Maud in her stead while she goes and prepares her birthday cake ingredients.

During that time, Pinkie just happens to find Maud, and before that, encounters an irksome character whom Maud then reveals is her boyfriend (not coltfriend, not horsefriend - "boyfriend"). Turns out, Maud's new kærasti is slow. Precise, literal, extremely intelligent, patient, sporting a rocking haircut that probably makes all the chicks drool over him, sounds and awful lot like Sheldon Cooper, technical to a extreme degree (with an emphasis on "technical"), but slow; slower 'en molasses, essentially. Indeed, "Mudstick" I think his name is, is the pointy blandness to Maud's sharp monotony -- they go together like peas in a pod.

Also, I think he's got as big a hard-on for sticks as he does fer Maud. Hmmm... that gets me to thinking; how would they conduct their copulating business, assuming their relationship involves it? Would it look dull, normal, or would they add sticks and rocks to it? That would be... oh. Oh, no. No, no, no, NOW I'VE GOT THAT IMAGE IN MY HEAD! GAAAH

Now, I might not be the brightest knife in the crayon jar, but even I know when someone looks mad. Pinkie's got a grudge against the guy who acts like her favorite sister, and grudges mean blood. Sadly, no blood is spilled, but we still get to see some funny Pinkie antics.

It all eventually adds up to a scene where Pinkie reveals her pure hatred for the stallion ripped straight out of the Big Bang Theory. Pinkie cries, runs away, suffers some hallucinatory visions of her friends if they were the opposite of who they were personality-wise and flees to her parents' home in the countryside.

During the 'Fink in Pink's stay on the rock farm/pony representation of Amish folk, we get to see the other two Pie siblings again (Limestone is jealous of Maud, and Marble's no longer having any of Limestone's crap). The Ukrainians later summon a Geodude to fight for them, Pinkie learns that Mudbutt's guts are made of sparkly, pretty blue gems if you crack open the fleshy prison that is his fragile body, and Limestone tells her to destroy her hated foe before the fandom inevitably starts drawning some fan art depicting him and Maud doing some kinky sh*t together. Pinkie returns to Ponyville, attempts to murder Mud-boy to death with a poison oak branch disguised as an olive tree under the belief that he would have an allergic reaction to it (it fails), and learns his true value as Maud's boyfriend. A party is thrown, a cardboard cutout of Maud gets it on with a hammered Spike for no reason whatsoever, and credits roll.

Important things I learned in this episode:
1. Stones and sticks make you sh*t bricks, but first ya gotta eat 'em.
2. Mudbutt and Maud are a cute couple. Wait... "Couple?" Like when someone couples with- OH, GODS, THE VISIONS ARE BACK! GGGAAAAAAAHHH!
Maud is still rock solid as ever, in terms of 'em fancy words she uses.
3. Pinkie is too overemotional and I like that.
4. Technicality is either a bundle of sticks or a crock of rocks.
5. Every time Pinkie sees visions of her friends in a different animation-esque light (like that time Rainbow Dash threw her pies away), I laugh harder than before.

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I liked this episode. The feelings Pinkie Pie feels toward Mudbutt for stealing her sister from her is an absolute hoot, given how he's just as much a foil for Pinkie as Maud is. All the characters were fun to watch. Maud was Maud, Pinkie Pie was Pinkie Pie, and Mudbutt was a big thorn in my side! Nah, just kidding, he was alright. Deliciously bland.

While it's a little sad to see Maud ruining all of our hard-worked ships, it also fills me with hope. Hope that Ember and Thorax get together! Oh, I just keep going there, don't I? Not counting that little incident, Everything was fine for me. The plot was something I could start predicting as it went on, but the characters were fun. Also, Pinkie Pie hallucinating made my day (I'm not shy, and I hate animals!/I never learned to read!). It was a good episode. 7.8/10, would bludgeon again.