Where can I find People who would Read/Critique a Story Outline? · 9:11pm Jul 4th, 2017
Hello, this is Zephyr Spark. I have this idea. In fact, I've had it for a year now, outlined and ready to be written. The story is titled "Arrow Dragon" (because I'm not good with names) and has the following plot:
Rainbow Dash discovers Spike has the makings of a great archer to represent Ponyville in the next Equestrian Games and decides to train him, but conflicts between dragons and ponies could make his dream impossible. When ponies suspect dragons of arson within their cities, even Spike comes under suspicion.
Unfortunately, my editor who usually looks at my outlines before I write them just never gets around to it. I want to start writing this piece eventually, but I would like somebody to read this outline first to make sure: 1) everything feels like it fits with the cannon show, 2) the characters act in-character, 3) it doesn't feel melodramatic or preachy, 4) it doesn't have parts with excessive exposition that bog down the story, 5) there aren't any extraneous or unnecessary scenes, 6) the readers feel sad/happy/mad when they should, 7) nothing feels forced, and 8) it reads well.
That's where I need help. Can anyone recommend a group or person willing to read and provide feedback on a 30 page outline? Or better yet, would anyone like to check this story out and give feedback? This outline consists entirely of bullet points with dialogue and short descriptions of events. I have it all on a Google Drive and can share it with anyone interested. I want this story to do well. I think it has content that can speak to a lot of people. In this time of history, I think it gives an important message. I don't want to spoil anything else here.
Thanks for your time.
I don't know about 3 or 4...
You Have
to get melodramatic in any sports flick, and without heavy archery exposition, how are we archery plebs supposed to know what's going on?!