Well...

I'm back. *hooray.*

I don't know what brought me back, to be honest. Not like anyone noticed, anyway. I have like, less than 10 followers and one of them is my sister....
ok enough of my complaining.

I've decided that I am tired of being this constant unhappy person I am. It doesn't mean I've changed completely, but I WANT to be happier. I just... don't exactly know how to be. You know, happy with myself.

I want to apologize to anyone who read my previous blog, if I worried you. It wasn't my intention.

I've been really busy lately. And, if you watch the world news, there was a shooting at the Grand Theatre 16 in Lafayette, Louisiana, USA. I lived there, and was literally about to go to the Grand Theatre 14 the next day.

So, yeah. I'm pretty pissed off about that.

I want to tell you a little bit about me.

I used to attempt suicide, I didn't get any major injuries, just scratches.

Emotional scars.

I was born in Atlanta, Georgia, USA. My parents split when I was.. 7. We moved to Lafayette, my mom, my sister (Candy) and I. And started off slow.

Over the years, I've been feeling unloved. My father doesn't call, and my older sister, who lived with her mother in southern Georgia, just graduated high school and is going off to college, now.

I've always felt like a burden to my mother. She is a single parent, pretty cliché, I know. But it was hard, especially since she has two twins to take care of.

She'd do whatever it takes for us - go to TARTARUS and back for us. (Unlikely, I know.)

I always thought that if I just ended it, no one would really notice. And she'd only have to take care of my sister.

I thought I'd be doing her well.

So I've been hiding my depression for most of my life now. And it was getting worse. The emotional scars started cutting deeper and deeper.

So I took a break from Fimfiction, just to get something off my chest for a while.

And during the week, I've been praying more that I feel happy, an that I can give myself a bright future.

My depression decreased a little bit. Which is better than it getting worse.

I've always been in a bad mood, still am, but I guess I can only make the best of it. I'm older now, no longer going to be brought down by much of anything.

Someone special told me once that that is all I can do sometimes. And that one day I'll look back to where I am right now, thinking, "I should have been happier."

So I want you guys to do me a favor.

I want you to be happy, and learn from my mistakes.

If you're depressed, or something's happened/happening I want you to do what Pinkie would want you to do. SMILE.

It's cliché I know, but just the slightest smile could brighten your mood.
For your depression: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7FpmILCPbE

Watch this too, it gives you some hopefully useful tips:

it may help.

And if you're dealing with depression so much you just want it to end...
this is perfect for you. Because believe me, it has helped me and Candy.

I hope this helps you.

Because right now all that matters to me is that you smile.

Thank you for reading this ridiculously long blog post.

Peace.

-Rose_Fire