HiE rant · 1:17am Oct 9th, 2014

I have thought about this long enough, and have finally decided to vent my frustration.
I do like the good HiE's, and probably give most more leeway than they deserve. Done right, it provides an interesting perspective.
But what bugs me are 3 things:
1. OMG I'M A HiE!
Why must everyone have watched the cartoon? In very few stories is a person truly out of their depth, as they have prior knowledge of the show. This usually reduces tension, prevents plotlines, and causes OMG YOU STALKER! moments.
2. YAY! HiE!
The vast majority don't seem to have any connections or wish to return home. My problem is usually with those that do have connections. They are usually whiny one chapter about how can't see X again, yet strangely seem to forget until plot point Y. People who are isolated from their homes for long periods are:1. make a new home. I don't have a problem with this. 2. Want to go home, and have hope they will reach it somehow. I have no problem with this. 3. Want to go home, and have no hope in reaching it. I have a problem with this, as humans isolated from their homes tend to get suicidal if they give up hope
3. THE ****** Obligatory Princess meeting
This annoys me to death.
Congrats! You are the first human to walk this place (or at least in a while)! Now we pass judgement upon thee! Earth sucks, some people are bad, some good, I'm no danger. Blablablablabla. Seriously, read a bunch of these meetings and notice how many have blatant similarities. While sure, the whole thing can add drama, fear, and be a good plot device, there is one teensy little problem with the vast majority (Off the top of my head I can only come up with 4 exceptions) of them.
No offense, but why the **** should they care? Seriously, think about it. The rulers are not Equestrias' welcome wagon, they are its rulers. They make laws, enforce them, some combination of the two, or whatever government-y things they do. They do not interrogate every new species discovered. While it might pique their interest, they honestly have better things to do than rewrite their whole schedule to accommodate Mr. H. If your character is a diplomat, or has other legitimate reasons, then they will. I applaud the author who took over 700k words to reach said meeting.
Oh, but humans are dangerous and fear, ideas, OOC! WHAT ABOUT THAT?
Compare a human to a Hydra. Which is more dangerous? I don't care about a philosophy rant or a technology rant, there is very little reason to say a human is more dangerous. Now which in fics get hunted down each time they appear because of the danger they pose? The human. This isn't even going into how jumping to conclusions about the unknown was covered in like the third episode.
BUT GUNS!
Are well within their technological capability to produce (crude, but still would work). I hate to break it too you, but unless the owner has shown signs that s/he might misuse it, taking the primary form of self defense is still theft. They have no right to confiscate it unless the owner is in a diplomatic situation (government functions or being arrested, and to be returned afterwords/if found innocent) or has shown a recent loss of mental faculties.
BUT VIOLENCE!
A Unicorn can levitate a sword through another's' neck. Fights happen in the show. Violence is not a disease that is transmitted through the air. Unless the violence occurs in Equestria or is admitted to have been done and not have been punished by the perpetrator, violence on earth is out of their control, knowledge, reach, and rule.
BUT WAR!
Is not new to them (though probably not recent). See the situation the Windigos fed off of, which if not exactly war still show that they are capable of it.
BUT BLABLABLA!
Without all the facts, making a judgment on something that is not your responsibility in the first place is dumb.

Other minor annoyances:
Solar system works not because canon but because X! - Second episode shows that something is actually ****** up and there is control over it. An explanation was given. Move on with the story.
Woe is me due to my millennia age! All my friends are dead! - My grandmother knows a LOT of people who are now dead. She cherishes those memories, and enjoys the new ones she makes with those still alive. By the fifth century, I'd imagine that they would do something similar or have committed suicide. While it would hurt, and hurt a lot, I feel it is usually overdone.
Characters X and Y must go together! - Unless you play matchmaker with your human friends, I call bull. Especially considering how invasive and controlling it is usually portrayed as.
RD is into mares because RAINBOW! - Judging another by the color of their natural hair seems suspiciously similar to judging someone by the color of their skin.

Thank you for your time.

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