Friends · 12:13am Dec 16th, 2013
I don't have many friends, people who know me might say I have dozens of friends, but truthfuly, there are only a handful of people I'd call my friends, everyone else I consider my enemy, or I'm just indifferent to them. The few friends I have, I try to keep in my life, but as I and life change, some of them leave. My oldest friend only just started hanging out with me again after a fairly long period of just passing by me, extending a friendly greeting but nothing more. To fully understand why I'm telling you all this, I have to go back to the start of high school, about four years ago now.
High school was horrible for me, I was an overweight, nerdy kid who spoke (and rapped) with a funny accent, despite the fact that I was born and raised in the very city I was schooled. I was bullied relentlessly and became depressed, it was the worst year of my life, but things began to pick up in the second year. I don't know if it was because of pity over a series of beatings and public humiliations the previous year, if people liked me as a miserable nerd with hypersomnia but a good sense of humour, or if everyone just grew up a little, but regardless of the reason, things were slightly better, and I acredit all to one man, the first friend, and in a few ways, the only friend I made in high school. He caught me reading a "deadpool" comic in geography and said he liked the character, from that point on, we hit it off. We bonded over classic hip hop and rap, and he introduced me to Tyler the creator. Unfortunately, the next year he and his family moved away, and we never really talked much. There was a brief period were we both stayed up late and texted each other, but unfortunately, like I said,it was only brief.
A few months ago I finally set up a facebook account, as I needed to contact another friend to ask if he wanted to hang out. I always thought of friending my old high school friend on facebook, but mere minutes,I finally went through with it, before looking at his timeline, and seeing everything he's been up to. It's crazy, I always thought that it sucked that he's no longer in my life, but looking at his facebook timeline I realised something, I was never in his, and I have only myself to blame, my hermit nature wouldn't allow me to go to parties or meet new people. It wouldn't let me be a true friend.
this could be another answer to your issue