Movie Review: Cabin in the Woods. [SPOILERS]

A horror movie where the cult is right for once. That's not how things work.

Alas fellow Programs, since my weekend was so hectic with a big football game at my school and meeting my crush and her boyfriend at Sac Brony, today I decided to relax with a nice movie rented from one of the few Blockbusters left in existence.

Enter the Cabin in the Woods, a horror movie that even a guy who generally hates them decided that he had to see what this was.

So what is Cabin in the Woods?

A group of teens seclude themselves away from civilization for a weekend only to be hunted down by a bunch of crazy psychopathic killers. Sounds like you've seen this movie before, it's because a facility needs the blood sacrifice of a Whore first and the Virgin last.

Let me just call bullshit, the whore doesn't die first the black guy does.

They control everything from temperature to how badly people want to bone.

Now I have to admire the characters. The facility workers are your average guys working that joke around and have worktime events such as the betting jar. Who wouldn't want to work at this place? They have all horror movie stereotypes like the dumb blond and the pot smoker.

Yeah, shit hits the fan when the whore, athlete, and scholar are killed but the fool and his pot make it through to save the virgin. They go down to that place and let me tell ya, military dudes are number one target for deaths in these movies. That's why I liked Aliens, they weren't a redshirt role.

I think the better movie would have been during the Purge scene with all the monsters going around the facility and killing people. I also have to applaud that they do it in their fashion. Doctors take and preform surgery on patients, Dismemberment Goblins pull people limb from limb and the doll people do like those dudes from The Purge... I don't know, never saw it.

My only complaint was the ending. But on the bright side, it is how This is the End started.