Final Update for Fimfiction

INTRODUCTION

Hello again, y'all, it's been a while and a LOT of shit has changed even though it hasn't been a year. But before we even get into that, people are screaming mentally 'who the hell is this?!' because they see a name and profile picture they don't recognize, and a page that has no stories, and I feel I need to address that first.

Yes, I am MajinSM. Or at least I used to be. About three months ago, I changed my nickname permanently from MajinSM to Melody of the Lexicon because the former had no meaning or value to me and was just an online identifier people could use to keep up with my stuff. That is no longer the case – my new nickname has actual meaning and symbolism for me as a person. More on that later. As far as the profile picture, it's my own IP – I had it custom-made by @ArtsGraphicPrints over on Etsy, so no more stock Google Images photo rip that I didn't even know until recently you legally aren't even allowed to do, at least not without obtaining a license first. And the biggest point, my stories...

I'll just rip the bandage off now – I've stopped writing and even mostly reading FiM works, and I don't know if I ever intend on coming back to the fandom. It's been a long nine years now ever since I discovered the fandom through my younger brother showing me a Molestia meme on YouTube he thought was funny, but I've since moved on to different projects, and my life has drastically changed since I initially began my journey.

For those who remember my FiM stories, especially my old flagship The Trials of Destiny, which is arguably the story I'm most known for even though I never got the popularity on the platform a lot of writers have – yeah, those are all gone now. They were all garbage that I had no intention of picking back up, especially now that I've recently come into a plethora of new resources and techniques to further improve my writing and reading comprehension.

Now I'll start talking about how things came to be since then and what I'm doing now, since that's the important part of this post.

RECENT EVENTS

I last posted here in July of 2022. Since then, a lot of things have changed, about me as a person, about my living and financial situation, and about my outlook on life. All of that isn't even getting into how I've been doing as a writer, which I'll cover in the final section of this post.

First and biggest thing that happened: I finally managed to get that whole mess with my car accident sorted out and I can now say I'm past that once and for all, even though it took until last month for that to be the case. I attended the remaining appointments I needed to so I could be given a clean bill of health, then went about picking up the pieces while I waited for my settlement.

Chronologically after that, I got my hours cut at work three times in a row, making my finances even harder to maintain; my relative continued to struggle with holding down a job, making said financial stress even more severe and causing me to default on my credit cards, which due to the situation had become impossible to continue paying down.

Then, in December, my relative had one of two key incidents which led me to make a very tough decision later on in the story, an incident which severely strained relations between them and everyone else in the family, and caused my stress to increase further while I waited for my settlement to finalize. Finally, with the relative, things went past the breaking point at the start of March when they made what I still consider two and a half months later to be the biggest mistake they've made in their entire life, and relations between them and the rest of the family snapped entirely, forcing me to remove them from my home for the sake of not ending up outright homeless.

I've talked a lot about how bad my finances have been, and as you can imagine, having to cut off half of the income that let me stay where I was should have effectively been a death sentence. Then, for what feels like the first time in my entire life, my luck finally turned around – I just barely got enough out of that settlement that it literally saved me. The car crash ended up being a blessing in disguise because it gave me just enough wiggle room to actually survive losing that much financial stability and still be able to live the way I have been. And while I wish it hadn't happened to begin with, the alternative would have been me living with my younger brother and his fiancé (which is a thing that also happened, but isn't relevant to the story) and being a constant third-wheel, so I'll take what I can get.

Thanks to that settlement and the fact I'm now finally living on my own as a result of everything that's happened, things have massively changed as far as my mentality and overall lifestyle, and things are still changing as I work to figure out what I want to do in the near and distant future. With the settlement allowing me to literally erase all my debt, I'm free to finally start a savings account and start working up to actually living in an apartment and/or eventually owning a home as opposed to being stuck in an RV (funny thing, that – when you don't have someone else living with you that makes the environment miserable to be in, RV life is actually kinda nice). That's also given me the breathing room I need to finally start looking for another job, which is something I'm actively having to do thanks to developments within the workplace that have radically changed my view on the company overall. Not going into that because NDA and all.

WRITING EVOLUTION, NEW PROJECTS, AND PAST STORIES

All of that leads me to the story of how I was able to figure out a bunch of things about myself that lead us to now, and to what I'm doing as a writer today.

First, I'd like to talk about the first major fandom that influenced my outlook and writing style in the time since my last update, that being Doki Doki Literature Club, the hit psychological horror VN game that took the indie world by storm in late 2017 and still has a dedicated and active player base to this day.

I came into finding about DDLC in late September as the game and community was celebrating their fifth anniversary, during a bored search for new VNs to help keep me sane as I continued playing through what is now solidly the largest VN of all time. I was intrigued by the concept of it seeming like your bog-standard dating simulator VN on the surface, only to be shocked beyond speechless at the turn of Act I and the subsequent events of the game. NEVER has a game made me so deeply and profoundly emotional before, and I've been invested in the fandom and in the many different interpretations of the characters and world since. The discovery of and subsequent infatuation with DDLC sparked my motivation to pick up my pen and begin writing a new story for the first time in almost five years, and as a result, that little tease you guys got of my ability to write horror and tragedy in the Prologue of ToD is now a defined part of my writing style.

Next, I want to talk about the media I've consumed to help manage my stress and how that led to the next major development in my writing style.

In December, I was watching a few of my favorite anime when they all ended up wrapping up back-to-back, leaving me with no way to relieve the building stress in my life. With that having happened, I came to the decision the only way to correct this atrocity would be to start an anime binge, where I saved any anime I found that peaked my interest with the intent of watching them all in a single sitting. I did this for about two and a half months, during which time I finished 20+ new anime series I might or might not have heard of up to that point, totaling more than 60 seasons and 800+ episodes across all of them. Among them, I want to highlight three key anime that have had a large impact on what I've been up to lately, those being Your lie in April, Rent-a-Girlfriend, and Love Live! School Idol Project.

Your lie in April is a rather short but immensely emotional and powerful romantic tragedy story that gained a lot of popularity for its theme and characters, but what drew me into the world immediately was how the anime heavily incorporates classical piano and violin compositions into the narrative of its story. On the other side, Rent-a-Girlfriend is a very silly romantic comedy anime where two young adults enter into a rental relationship, only to be put by their families and the world around them into increasingly fantastical situations that test one's resilience and the other's developing feelings while making it even more difficult for them to break off the fake relationship. After watching them and reading through the RaG manga, I discovered another spark that inspired me to start officially writing an active romance story. I'm not quite there yet but I have full intention of seeing if it's possible with the experience I've had in that regard the past four years to make a compelling narrative between the two properties.

I'll talk about LL later; you'll see why. Next, I want to talk about the things that made me start to change how I approach writing in general.

As I grew dissatisfied with how my old content was increasingly frustrating me due to the disastrously bad writing (at least for me), I ultimately decided in November with the immediate success of my DDLC story on FFN and AO3 that it was time to reinvent how I approach writing my stories and how I handle pacing myself to prevent burnout in the future.

Those who've followed me for a long time are very aware that I frequently suffered burnout from trying to do too much in too little time, and that I also struggled with the scope of my stories due to my reach far exceeding my grasp. Many of my stories were either reworked or scrapped (mostly the latter) as a result, because I just wasn't proud of what I had written anymore. Even some of my better stories, as I finally came back to writing, I realized had major flaws that prevented them from becoming stories I could genuinely enjoy. And one principle I've stoutly followed since two years ago is that I only write things I can enjoy myself. If I can't read my own stories and enjoy them the same way I do every other story I read, then in my eyes they're not good enough.

Harsh? Maybe, but as someone who can easily spot flaws in just about anything –and has absolutely no problem calling them out even if it gets me punched in the face– I always make it a point to be my own biggest critic, because otherwise I'd just be a massive hypocrite. It used to be that that mentality was a byproduct of my less-than-stellar outlook on life, but now that I've started fixing the problems that have been endemic to that mentality, now I just use it as a point of continuous growth and motivation.

I eventually joined the r/FanFiction subreddit's Discord server in December because I wanted to find more tools and advice to help further my writing, and through that I've found several resources that have allowed me to better understand things I wasn't doing correctly all this time, allowing me to better structure my stories. Through this, I've also started adding different kinds of flair to my story structures, allowing me to play around with different formats and see what fits my stories best based on how they're presented in canon and how I want to spice things up.

Finally, in late January/early February, I discovered the fandom that literally changed my entire outlook on life – Love Live! School Idol Project. I took a month break from watching anime in the middle of this anime binge because I was that focused on writing my other stories, but finished it in early March and have been invested in everything to do with the fandom since – I'm literally listening to a playlist of some of my favorite music from the anime even as I write this now. The immensely heavy emphasis on song and dance to help push the story as well as making for some very effective drama resulted in Love Live! quickly rising to the top of my favorite anime list, even passing Your lie in April, which had also been a favorite after I'd finished watching it. I saw a ton of potential in stories I could write with the fandom, and as a result, during a conversation in PMs which was sparked from a review I'd left on an LL fanfic, I was invited to a private Discord server specifically geared toward the fandom itself, where I've been an active participant since.

As far as the anime changing my outlook, it's no secret that up until recently, I hadn't exactly been happy with my lot in life. I felt like I just kept getting kicked in the teeth, and my job had already been years out on the idea of me actually enjoying what I did there thanks to being pushed into it by my father because 'it's where the big money's at', and it felt like I had stalled out on any real passion I could pursue in life. Watching Your lie in April and then Love Live!, combined with the three years I had spent in the eSports crowd, caused me to reach an epiphany and finally discover my dream, the thing I truly want to do in life, which is to eventually become a professional pianist and write my own compositions. This eventual realization was only solidified in my mind when I started listening to psychological rapper NF after the release of his latest album, HOPE. The song itself helped me realize that though there are differences in our experiences, I had a similar worldview thanks to everything I've been through, as well as a desire to change that and start working toward becoming someone and living a life I can look back on with pride.

Now it's time to go into detail with what happened to my old stories and projects, and what I've been doing as a writer since. I hinted at this earlier, but it's time to address the one most pertinent to you guys and this blog post.

The Trials of Destiny

In my last post, I announced that I'd put the story on hiatus. I can now confirm that the story is cancelled, and will never be making a return, nor will I return to writing any kind of shōnen content in the future. This story, despite being better than the steaming pile of shit I'd pulled it out of, was the latest in a long line of failures in terms of my attempts to write anything action-oriented, and through cancelling the story and the thought I've put into my writing style these past few months, I realized writing action stories just isn't my thing, nor is it something I'm even very good at, despite the people who have tried to tell me otherwise. If you were only interested in hearing about what happened to this story and have no interest in reading any further, you can go ahead and leave now.

The Legend of the White Fang

I deleted this story about halfway between the last post and now on FFN and AO3. It was supposed to be part of a series that would have tied back with ToD, but reach and grasp. Plus it was an idea I'd taken inspiration for from another writer on the platform, and I try to avoid that kind of stuff now, so the story got the axe.

The True Homefront

I still intend on rewriting the final chapter at some point, I just haven't gotten around to it what with the absolute maelstrom that's been my life this past year. I do still think I did good with that story despite there being action in it, so unlike my other stories from the past, once I rewrite that final chapter the story will stay up on FFN and AO3.

The Power of Us

I had announced in my last post this story would be going on temporary hiatus while I searched for a co-writer to write the story with. That situation changed when Ash won the World Coronation Series and TPCI did the thing everyone thought might happen but no one actually believed by retiring his character from the anime entirely. Seeing as his story is now complete after running for literally longer than I've been alive, I saw no need to continue writing the story, especially as the final series did a lot of things for his character and for the world that have, despite the many setbacks, made a lot of fans such as myself satisfied with the overall journey he's been on, so the story has now been removed.

Blades, Battles, and Bonds (originally my untitled story idea)

I decided not to move forward with writing this story, because being a crossover between two shōnen anime I love a lot, I knew I wouldn't be able to do the story or the characters justice. Nothing else to say on this.

Now that I've wrapped up on all the old stories that are now a figment of the past, it's time to introduce you guys to the new stories I've been writing since I returned. NOTE: the majority of these are not for the faint of heart, and I will warn people under a certain age not to read them depending on their content.

Doki Doki Eternity (also known as Exit Music: The Record Repeats) – Rating: Explicit (DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 OR THE AGE OF MAJORITY)

This is the story from DDLC I mentioned I was writing earlier in the post. This story focuses on trauma, tragedy, horror, and suspense, with some romance a bit later in the story. I haven't gotten very far into writing the story, but it starts out VERY dark and tackles a lot of extremely heavy real-world topics. Also of note is that playing through DDLC and the fanmod Doki Doki Exit Music are prerequisites for reading this story. Below is the summary of the story on AO3.

"In a world dominated by pain and suffering, five friends have had death tear them apart: Natsuki, who took her own life to stop her lover from being harmed; Michael, who took his own life after discovering Natsuki’s final suicide note, unable to handle the pain; Sayori, who took her own life after watching her best friend commit suicide, unable to fight her depression; Yuri, who died in a horrible accident while attempting to uncover the secrets of their reality; and Monika, who, unable to handle the emotional destruction of her friends’ repeated deaths, fell into a coma and died of heartbreak.

Once bright souls in the world, they all find themselves given new chances to restore order in their small town and build bonds. The road ahead is fraught with challenges, but when faced with perpetual rebirth, what can one do but bend the world to your will? These five traumatized friends will find themselves going against the worst pain any of them have ever known in exchange for the chance to have just one good life. They seek the answer to one question:

How far would you be willing to go to protect the ones you love when you’ve already died for them?"

Symphony of the Heart – Rating: Teen (this may change to Mature in the future depending on where it goes, but it's not likely.) – Recommended for age 13+.

This is the Your lie in April and Rent-a-Girlfriend crossover I mentioned earlier, and is probably going to be my first romance-heavy story, though it will also tackle some darker elements thanks to the influence of Your Lie in April in the events and characters of the story. This is also the first story I've written that involves active and extensive research to maintain worldbuilding and continuity, as I've found people are more likely to enjoy a story when it includes little things that help to keep them invested, instead of having something that doesn't make sense shattering their immersion. Below is the summary of the story on AO3.

"Five years ago, Kaori Miyazono died.

It was a very tumultuous time for young Kōsei Arima, who had spent the last year slowly growing closer to Kaori, who had sprung unexpectedly into his life and summarily turned it upside-down. Her death had changed him for a time, made him close back in on himself, but with the support and encouragement of his friends and family, Kōsei continued his renewed career as a pianist and did his best to look forward to the future. Now, Kōsei is set to begin a new life free from the shackles of the past, but one big obstacle remains, one that he has yet to handle or come to terms with.

He doesn't know what lies in store for his future, but he's determined to embrace it and learn the lessons he needs to to become someone Kaori can be proud of. There's just one problem - he's not sure if he's capable of love at all in the years since Kaori's death. And he doesn't know if he can trust his womanizing best friend's advice on how to go about solving that problem either. Little does he know, an encounter with a brunette performer at his friends' performances will change his fate a second time."

The Turning Point – Rating: Teen, mainly for safety. – Recommend for ages 13+.

This is a brief oneshot I wrote for Mob Psycho 100 back in February and March that reflects on issues I found in the story after it ended that made the final two episodes a bit difficult to come to terms with, and attempts to make the ending a bit more cohesive and give Tsubomi some desperately-needed character insight. Below is the summary of the story on AO3.

"In the wake of Mob's torrential release of power, Seasoning City has been left virtually in ruin. Espers and the authorities alike have done their best to both stop Mob and evacuate as many citizens as they could, but all attempts to stop Mob in his singleminded rampage have proved entirely fruitless. Even the Japanese government's attempts to step in have failed, Toichiro and Shō Suzuki's fight with Mob over in short order and with both badly wounded. Only through the efforts of his powerless master Reigen Arataka and a freshly reincarnated Dimple was the rampage finally brought to its conclusion, and Mob's power brought back under control.

However, with the physical threat now dealt with, Mob has to contend with another beast entirely - his feelings for Tsubomi and his own identity. As he prepares for a conversation he's been dreading yet also excited for, he must reflect on his journey over the past year and who he is, both as an Esper and as a person, and on the obstacles he's overcome to become who he is. How will his history affect this newly rejuvenated Mob, and when the emotional dust has settled, where will Mob and Tsubomi stand with each other?"

The Music and the Memories – Rating: Teen (this will more than likely change to Mature in the future) – Recommended for ages 16+.

This is my entry into the Love Live! fandom as a writer, and it's a story I'm taking great patience and care to write, because not only am I rewriting and reworking a BROBDINGNAGIAN part of the mechanics and lore introduced across the various iterations of the IP –and yes, that's actually a word, go look it up on Google, it means gigantic, I love it because it's such a fun word to say and it's easy to confuse people with– it's also the first (and probably only) self-insert story I've ever written. Patience and care are because I want to make my character as close a portrayal of myself as I possibly can, as well as making sure I'm keeping track of how I rebuild the world, so I have to do extensive research on this story and reflection of my own character attributes and qualities to make absolutely certain I'm doing this story justice. If all goes well, this will probably end up being my magnum opus as a fanfiction writer when all is said and done. Below is the summary of the story on AO3.

""I always thought things like reincarnation would be possible in some context. The universe works in very mysterious ways, and there isn't a concrete answer to what happens to our conceptual existence after we shuffle off the mortal coil. Still, to die and then be born again in the very world I had grown to be such a big fan of... I think anyone in that situation would be shocked. But I'm determined to make the most of this new chance! And while I'm at it, I'll do what I wasn't able to in my previous life and pursue my newfound dream!"

A self-insert isekai story set in an alternate timeline of the Love Live! universe where the main character must undergo various trials as he works to support his favorite school idols from the background and pursue his own not-entirely-unrelated dreams. What happens when you have to start again from square one, but everything around you has changed? Welcome to a study of human resilience and the drive to push forward even in the face of insurmountable odds."

CONCLUSION

This was a gigantic amount of information and updates I had to get through, but we're finally at the end of this long journey. I want to thank everyone who's supported me in the fandom for the past several years, even as I continued to fail to make genuinely good stories, and anyone who stuck around long enough to wait for me to make this update. Y'all are absolutely real and I wish you all the best.

As I said before, this will probably be my final interaction with the fandom as a whole, seeing as how I've drastically changed as both a writer and a person. If you guys want to keep following me on my fanfiction journey though, or if you're interested in the new content I'm writing, you can find me on FanFiction, Archive of Our Own, as well as on Discord with the handle @melodyofthelexicon.

Thank you to everyone who stuck around long enough to finish reading this and to those who decide to follow me. Here's to bigger and better things as I start this new and exciting chapter in my life!

– Melody of the Lexicon, formerly MajinSM