"This was so... so very kind of you, Mister... Mister..." A pair of blue eyes blinked quizzically under a two-toned mane. A fuzzy peach muzzle tilted skyward from in front of the confectionery. "What was your name again?"
The gutters here on the other side of town were far from clogged-up. Nevertheless, Flash Sentry took his sweet time in cleaning them—if only for an excuse to drink in the moment... this moment of digesting yet another mild acquaintance from Canterlot High turned-into-an-adorable-talking-horse-girl. He perched atop the ladder and kept the pitch of his voice low and masculine, as if the job he was currently tasked with was just as difficult and important as mixing concrete.
"Brad," he said. "It's a family name," he breathily mused. In truth, his real name appeared to fit more in this "Equestria" than the monicker he had randomly chosen. Part of him was more amused than vexed by that.
"Heehee!" Bon Bon giggled, as chipper as ever. She fit right in this place. "Well..." She raised a hoof daintily while motioning towards the interior of her establishment with her fluffy head. "...I'll go and get some refreshments. That should cool you down after all the work you've been doing."
"Oh, I'm fine."
"You sure?"
Flash nodded, scraping meager bits of leaves and grit out of the gutter with a garden rake. "Mr. Cake was super-nice to give me plenty of water to drink back at Sugarcube Corner."
"Wow... you've been super helpful to everypony today!"
"Nah. You're just the second." Flash glanced down at the glossy windows of the place, behind which several bright candies and peppermint treats were displayed in full pastel glory. "Nice shop you have here, by the way."
Bon Bon giggled. "Th-thanks! It's a small start... but I'm hoping to branch out and open more locations! Set up an entire enterprise of candy shops, y'know..."
Flash smiled. "Guess you got over your mortal fear of baking, huh? That's good to know."
The mare cocked her head to the side, squinting. "What do you mean?"
Flash paled. He could feel his ears folding atop his blue head as he realized—to his stupidity—that this was far from the "Bon Bon" he had gotten to know back in his world. Of course she wouldn't know about the trials and tribulations of a certain blue-and-pink haired girl back in Canterlot High's Home Economics class. Of course... she wouldn't have any personal recollection of a petite teenager—blushing a rosy storm—hiding behind Flash Sentry's apron'd figure as the two were crucified before the judging council of the Friendship Games for a veritable log of inedible angel food cake. At some point—where the souls converged, human and equine—a masterful talent for baking must have been born.
"Just th-that..." He rambled, attempting to burst the clouds of his own contemplation before too much silence reigned. He fidgeted atop the ladder, scraping and stabbing. "It's one thing to have a talent." His eyes wandered to the distant markings on her flank. Beforehand, it had always been a random marking on her backpack—a button on her blouse. Now it was her everything. How curious and frightful all at once. "It's another thing to build your whole career out of it. You must be quite proud of yourself, Miss Bon Bon."
"Hmmmmm... thanks. I am." Her fuzzy cheeks turned slightly rosy, and Flash regretted not having fingertips anymore. "And thanks for calling me 'Miss.'"
"Don't mention it."
"Still, you may not be thirsty now, but you will be soon, I bet." She winked, turning to trot briskly back inside the establishment. "Let me fetch some lemonade! It's the least I can do!"
"Heh... if you insist."
As she entered, two other ponies exited. Flash recognized the lime and gray shapes in an instant.
"I see you've become fast friends," Octavia Melody murmured.
Flash scraped and scraped. "Shouldn't I have?"
"Bon Bon has been... uhm..." Lyra toed at the sidewalk in the ladder's shadow. "...super serious ever since she opened this place. The store means a lot to her... the success of it, I mean... uhm..."
Octavia spoke firmly over Lyra's voice. "Any small task—however menial—goes a long way. Thank you again, Mr. Brad."
"Please. Just 'Brad,'" the stallion said. "I insist."
"Mmmmm... indeed." Octavia smiled daintily, keeping within the shade of the front awning in order to keep from sweating through her soft, velvety coat. She adjusted her bow tie and gazed across the streets of Ponyville. "I swear—we get all the kind-hearted visitors in this town. I'm going to miss it terribly during the week Vinyl and I are away."
"Why's that?" Flash asked.
"Well, as much as I appreciate Canterlot culture and glamor—city life simply isn't as agreeable as I would like it to be."
"Yeah..." Lyra shuddered slightly. "It's why I moved in with Bon Bon."
Octavia tossed her a cool smile. "Among other things."
"Er, well..." Lyra blushed instantly, rubbing the back of her head. "Of course."
Flash—in the meantime—was busy scrunching his muzzle in abject confusion. "'Canterlot'... so there's a Canterlot here after all..."
"Erm... yes..." Octavia squinted up at him, nodding. There was a throaty, probing slant to her tone. "A most splendid capital. Why—is there a 'Canterlot' where you come from?"
"Uhhhhhhh..."
"Though, if you ask me," Lyra said, "It's a bit less 'splendid' now that we've got our own princess. Teehee."
Flash remarked, "You say that like you've bought a fishing boat."
"Well, I just mean that Canterlot's got princesses. The Crystal Empire's got a princess. But now—Ponyville's got Twilight Sparkle!" Lyra smiled wide. "Talk about putting our town on the map!"
"So... wait..." Flash wobbled a bit on the top of the ladder. "You mean... there's more than one princess?"
Lyra merely stared up at him, green lips pursed.
"Indeed," Octavia spoke with remarkable grace. "Twilight Sparkle, Celestia, Luna and Mi Amore Cadenza." The musical mare blinked hard. "Oh—and of course—the newly foaled Flurry Heart. Goodness... still getting used to that one."
"Holy..." Flash nearly dropped the garden rake from his muzzle. "Luna and Celestia? They're princesses too?"
"Uhhhhhh..." Lyra craned her head. "You feeling okay up there, sir? Maybe the heights are rushing the blood a bit too hard through your head."
"Does this surprise you, Brad?" Octavia asked calmly.
Flash bit his lip. All this time, he had assumed that there was only one princess in Equestria. When he thought of her silky purple hair, sparkly violet eyes, and fair lavender skin—it all made perfect sense. Then he felt another flutter to his heart, and he instantly regretted it. The regret had a familiar scent—of dust and shadows that had become his bedmates over the past few months. So—stifling a sigh—he thought past it... and past her. He thought about Principal Celestia and Vice Principal Luna... fellow sisters and career-oriented women... authoritative and graceful. In his mind, they'd make great Queens... but princesses? Still, he wasn't one to dictate to this world... only delight in it.
"Huh... Princess Celestia and Princess Luna." A dumb smile crossed his muzzle, chasing the dust and shadows away from the corners of his mind—replaced instead with sparkles and glitter. "Like..." He glanced down at the two mares. "Glass slippers and wishing upon a star and all that jazz?"
"Well... no..." Octavia slowly shook her head. "...something more akin to representative monarchy, wise diplomacy, and executive leadership."
"Oh!" Lyra hopped in place, grinning. "Don't forget raising the sun and moon!"
"Oh. Quite. Also important."
"Wait wait wait..." Flash squinted in the suddenly obtrusive sunlight. "Who does what now?"
"Uhhhhhhh..." Lyra talked out the side of a wincing muzzle, almost sarcastically. "Celestia raises the sun and Luna raises the moon?"
"Like... literally?" Flash blinked. "With their hands?" He blinked again. "Hooves—I mean."
"You... sure you don't need to come down from atop the ladder now, Brad?" Lyra asked. "Bon Bon's getting some cool refreshing lemonade! Why not have a sip... eheh..." She tittered nervously.
"I'm just trying to get this straight." Flash waved with the garden rake in his grasp. "These princesses... literally control the sun and moon?"
"Mmmmhmmm." Octavia calmly nodded. "Every day."
"You've seen them do it?"
"Well..." The music mare brushed her smoky bangs back. "I haven't actually attended any of the Summer Sun Celebrations in person. But that's like asking me if I see grass grow. It's just a known fact."
"Yeah." Lyra nodded. "I suppose if you wanted to see it being done yourself, you could just show up in Canterlot at daybreak and watch it for yourself. It's what I used to do when I lived there."
"In Canterlot?"
"Yeah! Up there!" Lyra pointed forty-five degrees skyward.
Flash turned. Flash gazed. And that's when he saw it, tilting his head up and up and up until at last his blue eyes reflected a monumental set of castle spires looming in the hazy distance atop an equally monumental mountain. "Holy smokes...!" His voice left him in a gasp, and soon did his balance. He teetered, tilted, and—
Th-Thud!
"Oh horseapples!" Lyra yelped. The ladder was still rattling to a sideways stop when she came down from her shocked jump. "Brad! Mister Brad!"
Octavia was the first to reach his side. "Shhhhhhh... easy there, sir." She steadied his stiff body with a gentle hoof placed on her shoulder. "No sudden movements. Stay calm. Now..." Her eyes narrowed. "Are any of your limbs broken?"
The legs in question stuck up like an orange cockroach's. Wide eyes beamed in the center of the stallion's face. "Mother of God..." To the mares' surprise, he shot up and sat in a dumbfounded stupor. "...you ponies built a high school on top of a mountain?!"
Octavia raised an eyebrow.
"Uhhhhhhh..." Lyra blanched. "What? High school?"
"Where the Hell do you have P.E.?" Flash teetered on the brink of dizziness and delirium. He smiled through the throbbing pain of having plummeted ten feet to the sidewalk. "Gotta watch out for those mountain goats at the line of scrimmage! Haha...!"
"Alright, good sir." Octavia gently hoisted the stallion to his legs. "Let's get you inside now."
"Do school buses just plummet into a ravine or what?"
"Shhhh..." Octavia gave him a shoulder to lean on as they hobbled inside the candy shop. "That's it. Keep asking questions. Even silly ones." She looked behind them. "Lyra, be a dear and go fetch Bon Bon."
"Right away!" Lyra nodded. After holding the door open for them, she scampered inside and towards the back. "Bon Bon! Quick! We have a gutter-cleaner down!"
I think the insanity of the situation is finally getting to him. He's likely to be a giggling mess for a while before sobering back up. And he will be very confusing for quite a while in the meantime.
I feel ya, Brad. I feel ya.
Oh don't mind me, just centralizing some powers here and there.
And the absurdity crashes into him like a southbound freight train. I wonder what he'll let slip when we see him next, or if his 'cover' will be blown...
7794520
That's what happens when you finally wrap your head around the implications of trans-dimensional quantum physics and all. I'm surprised his mind hasn't exploded....or imploded at this point.
He's not being very subtle. I suspect Twilight is going to find out about him pretty quickly. And she knows what he looks like as a pegasus even.
My fear of being on ladders continues to increase.
So.. I'm guessing this isn't in the same universe as "The Things 'Tavi Says"?
7794614
I'm imagining if every Skirts story took place in the same universe, and the astonishing clusterfuck that would be.
7794622
For some reason, we spordalically get glimpses that seem to point that they are atleast connected to a degree..
But the amount of rainbow dashes alone man!
We'd have a virtual rainbow of the emotional spectrum.
Yes, that makes you blink, but the idea of a school on a mountain warrants falling off your ladder. Flash. Priorities!
Oh dear Flash, you left your brains behind in tourist lost luggage. Dont worry, Im sure Pinkie will be along very shorty with a whole plate of Marble Cake.
7794588
Hence why the author made her conveniently out of town for an indeterminate amount of time, possibly just long enough for him to wise up and have everyone forget he was acting so oddly the first couple days he was there. Otherwise yeah, there's not much chance of him lasting two days before Twilight found him out at this rate.
Once she does get back though, I wonder how long Flash will stick around before fleeing town just to avoid any confrontation with her.
I don't think there's enough sunstroke in the world to cover for all of these questions that seem obvious to the locals. The good news is that they won't suspect a changeling; even they know about the royal celestial mechanics. The bad news is I'm not sure what they'll think.
Of course, if this Equestria stays as sugary sweet as it's been thus far, they may just give an absurd amount of benefit of the doubt.
I'm waiting for the inevitable pink, and the party that's sure to come along, and three guests - one purple princess in particular. With speaking to Starlight and the Cakes, and being as different as he is...I don't think it's an "if" but a "when."
It'll be a mess, but I think Flash-Brad needs it to happen. I just hope it ends up well, I want him to be happy.
Yep...his psyche is approaching critical mass before he cracks...
7795042
I'm torn between wanting Twilight to return and be informed about the really thick-headed changeling everypony feels sorry for, or having Thorax try to coax him into dropping the infiltrator act.
(Also, if the changelings know about the princesses moving the sun and moon, I wonder why they keep kidnapping/laser blasting them...)
Well... That's why they call it High School.
Flash lost it
Well, there's always only so much someone is able to handle.
At least he can make up a story about being too much in the sun or something, unless he really wants to tell the truth, heh.
7794588
7794764
Especially since there's precedence for Twilight to be called in for medical emergencies.
7795867
Ditto on dipomatic emergencies. The Thorax thing would be awesome, though.
Princess Twiliiiiight! Your weekly hijinks to be solved is here!!
7795947
S-shut it!
7795947 That and.....other reasons
Ehh, it could have ended worse.
Yep, he's definitely cracking. He can't even try to keep his guard up now, it's a good thing he hit his head when he did. Assuming him staying hidden is good, of course.
Honestly Flash really needs to learn just to roll with it at this point. His questions are going to get him in trouble, find a library to figure out the basics. That way you at least don't look insane.
7802176
But the only Library is in You-Know-Whos Castle :D
Well, lemme put it like this, Flash ..... Don't Slam-Dunk the Basketball Goal. It's a loooooong drop.
TOUCHDOWN BY ASRIEL FOR THE CANTERLOT DREEMURRS!
Octavia tossed her a cool smile.
SUHH KEWWWTT!
"Please state the nature of your medical emergency."
Wow. This is delightfully silly. I feel like you're sculpting marble out of flash (just like the sponge would) and making him into a whole new character from what we know about him already.
I like it. The first chapters were really depressing, but its so close to how it felt, and it really compliments the equestrian side of the mirror.
7795947
I expected to see Flash Sentry blow himself up to leave the world completely. I am disappointed. Thumbs down to this fanfic.
But in all seriousness, I didn't get what I came for and so I'm just going to go.
7794622
Austraeoh would be kinda short if she ran out of pills.
8778788
I mean, the prominently displayed and very obvious picture showing Flash standing in front of the portal, with his pony-self reflected in it was kind of a dead giveaway, no?