Across the land, under the afternoon sun, ponies and non-ponies alike were opening their mailboxes to find a mysterious note from the newest princess.
Dearest subject:
If you are receiving this letter, it means a pony by the name of Super Trampoline has been writing horrible short romantic fiction about you, as he has about scores of other ponies, myself included. I and others affected will be convening in the Ponyville town hall to discuss what to do about this libel, defamation, and generally trashy writing. This gathering will take place this coming Saturday the 16th at 2:00 p.m.. If you cannot make it, please send a representative in your place, because reasons. Enclosed you will also find a copy of the story (or in some cases stories) he has written about you. I eagerly await our meeting.
Yours Truly, Her Royal Highness Princess Twilight "I Love Books" Sparkle
Across the land, under the afternoon sun, ponies and non-ponies alike were reading what Super Trampoline had written about them. Among the many, two in particular were especially vocal: "WHY DOES EVERYPONY THINK I'M GAY?!?" Rainbow Dash and Braeburn simultaneously yelled from several hundred miles apart.
It Begins!
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Wait if they all get together then they will try to stop you from making these stories that I like for some reason
And if they do that there will be no new stories
And if that happens Í'LL HAVE TO GET A LIFE
Well *picks up shotgun* that gathering will NEVER HAPPEN
3484974 don't worry. I have... Plans.
3485199 Well I'm still going to kill some of them
3485223 please stick to hunting zombies
3485272 Can't no zombies to kill
Now to play the waiting game... *stares at watch*
Sneak peak from a forthcoming chapter:
SHINING ARMOR: "Darn it Twilight, why did you have to send my wife that letter? After she read it she made me dress up and role play as Gilda. I had the most confused boner.
TWILIGHT SPARKLE: Ewwwwwww!!! Shining, why do you always tell me about the most awkward parts of your sex life? TMI!!!
Why didn't i get this letter?
''Ok, if Breaburn and Rainbow want to know why everyone thinks they're gay, I'll tell them. Breaburn, we've never seen you hit on a mare but we've seen you eye a couple of stallions. Rainbow, season one, you had a wingboner when you saw Pinkie dressed as a stripper/prostitute. That's why.''
''Wh-what!? I never had a wingboner in season one! E-especially not one while Pinkie was there.''
''Keep tellin' yourself that. Breaburn? What are you doing?'' *Backs away from Breaburn who's walking slowly towards me*
''Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!'' *runs as far away from Appalosa as possible*
''Help meeeeeee! GAH!''
3486980 SNEAK PEEK that was half the chapter. (if the chapter is a hundred words)
Really Rainbow Dash, that's what upsets you?
You've been shipped with the FimFiction logo, a food processor, a lava lamp and some scrolling text, but you complain about the one time you were actually paired with a pony? And the one that wasn't even Super's fault?