Nightmare Moon's returned and Twilight captured. In order to survive she must sacrifice everything
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Starting off with a Twilight scene this chapter. It's mainly to set the scene, show how she's been and how insane she now is with the whole hearing Celestia thing. Not much to say really.
Next is RD section. This one was originally going to be focused on Spitfire and Gilda, but I figured the chapter would be long enough as is so I cut out the whole Nightwish vs Spitfire and Gilda scene. Needless to say, this bit was as much to establish how power Dash is as it was to establish how powerful Soarin and Spitfire can be. Mainly Spitfire though and her throwing around of fire. I also tried to make Dash feel very much General, while still retaining that egotistical side of her. On the topic of everyone's favourite weather pegasus, obligatory Sonic Rainboom. And rescuing Rarity for bonus marks too though this time no Wonderbolts getting knocked unconscious.
Trixie now! This was an interesting one to write. I really wanted to show her as being more than an egotistical mare and that she actually cares about those under her command as well as feeling guilty over all the deaths that occurred while she was commander of Reinsville. Also, I tried to show her on a more equal footing with Twilight with both of them suffering pretty extreme injuries that they heal up.
If memory serves, AJ is next and this one was interesting to say the least. I wanted to the other facet of her whole Truth obsession that she has going on. This one was mainly for impact and character development considering how much action is in this chapter.
Then we get Pinkamina. I went for Rule of Cool showing her doing physics defying stunts, but I didn't want to go so far off that it ended up being a comedy or pulling people out. Hopefully I succeeded. I also wanted to show that she isn't just a total psychopath and that she does have more depth than "Kill". Of course, considering she is part of Pinkie (or Pinkie's part of her), I had to inject some humor in there.
And then it was Fluttershy and we finally moved past the Sonic Rainboom. This was one was really just showing how different she is now compared to who she was. Not much more to say on that note. The same really goes for Rarity's section. That was there to explain what happened to Pinkamina after the Sonic Rainboom. Oh, and also a cliff hanger.
Finally it was back to RD and her show down with Twilight. Originally it was going to be longer, but I felt it was unnecessary as the real point of the entire scene was the ending. With RD we're bought back a full circle to her very first revelation involving her mother, which I felt was a very nice sort of conclusion. And of course, cliff hanger. Maybe I should have extended it?
If you read all that, you deserve a medal.
well... this is what i'm kinda seeing right now with all the pony's, especially twilight.
852481 Yep, Twilight is... out there...
Holy crap man...Rainbow Dash
This is the second fic I've read in 2 days where Rainbow sacrifices herself. My heart, it weeps
you have something good going here, like really good.
These Dark knight Twilight stories never fail to entertain me, and i can't put a finger on why, i simply love them.
faved, tracked, watched and all that good stuff.
you need a proofreader though, because more then once did i find small errors that completely threw me off, really annoying..
i reckon both twi and dash are both still alive but very badly hurt, then get pick up by the dawn and the couler that twi is wearing is broken
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Chapter 1 reply: Why? Because I'm tired of dark fics that just go "Oh well, NNM won, let's call it a day guys" and that's that. Plus, I felt starting off with torture would set the mood rather nicely and let people know just why that dark tag is there and where I'll be going.
Chapter 19 reply: I'm glad you're enjoying it so much and thanks for the fav and watch! Yeah, the errors are a major problem for me, but I like tot hink I'm getting better. I'm currently in the process of finding a proofreader though so hopefully that'll be less of an issue in the future.
856810
After I finish typing this reply, I'll be editting and posting up the next chapter so wait and see!
I almost expected Pinkie to rape Silent Spell if the change in personalities hadn't occurred when it did. Very, very powerful chapter. Well done.
I have to ask, where did you get the inspiration for those griffin names? It's obviously something Italic, but I'm curious if there's anything else to it than a simple google search of foreign names.
When Trixie was fighting Twilight in Los Pegasus, this was all I could think.
i.chzbgr.com/completestore/12/6/24/5mPO26Oo0k6xyKweXrjKUA2.png
Cause Trixie sucks compared to Twilight.
I noticed you used "trust" instead of "thrust" a couple times. But since you admitted that you probably won't go back and edit, I forgot what else I saw.